Monday, April 05, 2010

They are Not David

I'll leave a full-fledged finals preview to the more proficient prognosticators and budding analysts among our editorial staff, but I want to take a moment to attempt to debunk the popular "David vs. Goliath" theme that's circulating the sports world today, regarding tonight's tournament final.

Butler is from a non-power conference. Butler plays in the state where Hoosiers takes place. Butler has some scrappy Caucasian players and a scrappy Caucasian coach. And even though Duke may well be a Goliath (and Zoubek looks like an oafish ogre), Butler is no David. Here's a quick look at the team's results this year:

Record: 33-4. Three of these losses came against power conference schools (Minnesota, Clemson, Georgetown), two of which were ranked all year. The fourth loss was against UAB, which looks like the lone fart on Butler's schedule. However, UAB was 25-9 this year and had some decent wins of their own. That UAB loss was on December 22nd. Butler has reeled off 25 straight wins since. Among its 26 regular-season wins (pre conference and NCAA tourney wins) are out-of-conference wins against Northwestern, UCLA, Ohio State, Xavier and Siena. And the team ran the table in twenty conference games.

Yes, the coach looks like a nerd, especially when he hip-bumps his players in the locker room. Yes, you may not have known where the school was located. No, they are not David. They are an exceptionally well-coached team with a suffocating defense.

294 comments:

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Clarence said...

I was in the same fraternity and know many of the guys you are talking about and it still sounds like Tales from Band Camp to me, so it's to be drudgery for Mark and Dan.

Mark said...

And Rob's right. I didn't want to say it but Butler's beating on Duke.

d-train said...

looked like a goaltending

Jerry said...

I think I've been able to pinpoint the source of Butler's defensive effectiveness -- commit at least 5 fouls on every defensive possession.

d-train said...

igor- it's your consideration of others that inspires me so.
i'm printing out the storyline as we speak - i plan on diving in tomorrow during my 8:30 a.m. visit to department 13.

T.J. said...

Dan, break out your galoshes, cause Butler's raining threes...

rob said...

damn, butler is so sound defensively

Geoff said...

A guy named Gabe, who had a Noreiga-esque (the dictator, not the rapper) complexion experienced a similar Jeff Bergman rush denoument in the late 90s. He was brought up at maybe 10 meetings over several years. He did finally get in as a junior I believe, after I graduated. He was about as cool as anal warts.

Geoff said...

A guy named Gabe...you know the rest...

Mark said...

You're not playing fair, Rob.

d-train said...

speaking of "as cool as anal warts" let's give it up for the duke band everybody

zman said...

If Butler wins is this the best tournament ever?

rob said...

the throws are free!

Clarence said...

Jukes has begun his second charity, "Bricks for Uganda."

rob said...

at the risk of recency error, z, i think it's in the conversation regardless who wins

zman said...

Doubtless.

TR said...

Don't forgot Jukes' blatant blocks of Duke defenders when his teammates drive.

Hayward looks like his mom. Not a strong statement for Mrs. Hayward.

rob said...

i kinda liked mrs. hayward

TR said...

Coach K has "no interest" in the Nets' job. If I remember correctly, Roy Williams had "no interest" in the UNC job a few years back...

Mark said...

I think Gordon Hayward is Zoltan's new favorite player.

zman said...

Does he have anal warts?

Clarence said...

If Butler ends up winning it, what are the odds on the NY Post being "Butler Did It"? 6:5?

TR said...

Rob - Did you also have a crush on Roseanne's sister Jackie, from the show Roseanne?

zman said...

Joyce DeWitt over Suzanne Summers?

T.J. said...

Daddy Mack...first out o' limo.

zman said...

I made the mistake of asking someone at work "Who do you like in tonight's game" after they brought it up and they said "How can you root against Duke?" This is why I generally don't talk sports at work.

mayhugh said...

Quick quiz for the younger frat guys on this thread - who was the gentleman for which Greg threw out his strongest gray?

Mark said...

It's fun to yell things like 'Das Scheyer' in a thick German accent when Jon Scheyer makes a big play.

mayhugh said...

Or for whom. Whatever.

zman said...

I'm stunned that we don't have more chatter here about Howard's stache.

Clarence said...

How can you root against Duke? Let me count the ways...

1. I want to smack that shitty smarmalade look off Scheyer's face so hard that Singler's anal warts fall off.

mayhugh said...

Scheyer looks a bit like Doug Neidermeyer.

Mark said...

AHL x 2000.

mayhugh said...

Now THAT was a foul.

d-train said...

i think this is howard's way of expressing interest in your little fishing trip...i mean i'm sure he's a g:tb follower

wow that's a big foul...

T.J. said...

How's it feel to be an independent Plumlee?

d-train said...

good acting job on hayward. seriously - he was hardly touched.

rob said...

i enjoy dan after a few captain and cokes

T.J. said...

For the first time tonight I am actually believing Butler can win the national title.

d-train said...

danimal is up way past his bedtime

Clarence said...

Kudos to whichever of you gents mocked the Duke band earlier. Goodness.

TR said...

Clark Kellogg just tried to pull a Gus Johnson with his "making sweet music" line. Didn't work for him.

Mark said...

I heart timeouts.

d-train said...

so you're drinkn' cap'n and cokes tonight heh rob? arrrghh!

rob said...

fuck you, teejay. karmafucker.

TR said...

http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0582418/

Greg said...

Doesn't Rob want Duke to win?

zman said...

I think she went to school with us.

mayhugh said...

Butler hates scoring the ball in the second half.

mayhugh said...

Doozy of a last minute.

rob said...

waugggggggggh

d-train said...

howard loves 'em some o-rebs

T.J. said...

I'm so excited I just spilled my ballots

Mark said...

The take and assist by Hayward were the play of the game so far. Great instincts and courage.

TR said...

Good to see Luke from Modern Family in the commercial for The Hartford. Thank you for making that happen, Marls.

mayhugh said...

This just got really interesting

d-train said...

a foul on z there...jesus

T.J. said...

Anyone seen Ollie?

mayhugh said...

Coach K looks spooked.

Greg said...

Hobbits love the Scheyer

Clarence said...

You guys have GOT to see what show is on TBS right now. Hilarious.

d-train said...

now hoping for:
a) a butler win, or
b) overtime and duke win by more than 7 points
not necessarily in that order

rob said...

most intense final ever? at least since 2007, anyway.

T.J. said...

I have not drank a red bull this eveing and I'm shaking like a farley wrapped in a belushi to go

Mark said...

A bit of a case of nerves for Duke. Smith leaves an open lefty layup short and then Singler nearly airballs a 15 footer.

TR said...

Think Coach K "Pitinos" women on the table-tops of Durham restaurants?

mayhugh said...

Come on Butler

d-train said...

you got me there igor...
i usually tivo it and watch it on neverday

mayhugh said...

This ball is coming back in to Heyward. Kellogg will tell you the most dangerous guy is the guy inbounding the ball.

zman said...

That CAN'T be the play they drew up.

rob said...

damn.

TR said...

Kellogg can not say that was a good shot by Hayward.

No way Z makes both.

zman said...

I hate Duke.

Greg said...

That would have been totally rad

mayhugh said...

Good game. Hard to be mad about that.

rob said...

can you imagine?

TR said...

Nate James needs to tone it down. He's been a little too excited all night. Dammit.

zman said...

Zoubek celebrates like he has an extra chromosome.

zman said...

Whose clock did Howard clean on that screen?

Mark said...

I agree that Hayward's shot wasn't optimal, but it looked like it was good to me. And his half court heave was pretty fucking close too. Which would've obviously been the greatest thing ever.

TR said...

Singler is the one who got decked and flopped.

zman said...

http://www.kfc.com/doubledown/

d-train said...

ummm....yeah....thanks for these nice hats, but ummm....i think you're gonna need to re-do 'em....yeah....we're not real crazy about the gangsta look down here at duke....

rob said...

yeah, no beef with hayward's shot. bet he makes that half the time. the half-courter would've been the biggest achievement in human history.

Jerry said...

I think I threw up in my mouth a little bit when that last shot was in the air.

2010 Champion. Wooohoooo!

Clarence said...

Back in Durham, the Duke lax team celebrates by getting a stripper.

d-train said...

just saw obama's first pitch. wow. he even pitches way left.
sorry. he's a homo.

T.J. said...

Mark, vote early, vote often. http://bit.ly/d1MigC

TR said...

So is Dan gonna get himself arrested now?

d-train said...

not that there's anything wrong with that
and the whole white sox cap donning - the way he put it on annoyed me....as did yesterday's presser when tiger called someone "broh" and "longwinded" when the question posed wasn't to his liking - am rooting for 80/80 thurs/fri scores for the d-bag

T.J. said...

Oh the humanity!

The rules of word game Scrabble are being changed for the first time in its history to allow the use of proper nouns, games company Mattel has said.

Greg said...

That makes scrabble worthless. If "Lacedarius" is a proper noun that can be allowed, then what can't?

Dave said...

fuck. in my life, i am undefeated in scrabble. this rule is going to jeopardize that. i don't watch tv or buy clothing or partake in the american consumer society, so i don't know how to spell brand names, such as "ugggggs" and "peepz." i am screwed.

Dave said...

the scrabble rule change is an urban legend.

there is a new scrabble-like game comig out that will alow backwards words and stealing letters and all sorts of tomfoolery, but this has nothing to do with the classic scrabble game.

where does TJ get his information from?

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