Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Abbreviated Bracket Thoughts

As if we weren't already late to the party with any sort of bracket talk, rob has to go and post about the Pope this morning. Something needed to bump that down the page, and that something is me coming to you via blackberry while sitting on the can. That's right folks, here are some rambling, rather incoherent thoughts about this year's NCAA Tournament, typed while sitting in the john. The post ends when I start losing feeling in my legs. Let's call it the "Shitter Twitter" for fun (be prepared for horrendous spelling errors, a complete lack of capitalization, and mercifully for you, no links or clips...IT won't give me a damn media card for my bberry):

*siena is beating ohio state. thought i'd get that out of the way first and foremost. unfortunately, seth davis and many other "pundits" agree with me, possibly leading to the reverse jinx. speaking of the reverse jinx...

*vcu will not be beating ucla. sorry resident caa pole smoker rob, but the maynor magic is not to be this year. i just don't see a club with a bunch of dudes who have been to three straight final fours losing in the first round, even though i recognize they're not as good as in previous years.

*tr and tj will be winning their bet with dennis, though i forget if it was duke winning two games or three games in this tourney. texas might not get them, but villanova will.

*i'm pretty sure the big ten is poop (see, it took me that long to make a poop joke...where's my award ribbon?) and i see first round loses for the aforementioned ohio state, minny (to tx), wisconsin (to toney douglas, er florida state) and yes, the 12/5 upset western ky over illinois. illinois' point guard has a broken right hand. he's right handed. and these clowns lost a game this year 38-33. come on.

*michael jack should be happy, because i actually buy into the whole "unique systems win tourney games" and thus think beilein and his 1-3-1 will give clemson fits. just don't leave oglesby open.

*i have absolutely no clue if washington is any good. yes, they won the pac 10, and yes, they have a very good big man who could probably carry them a long way. but jarvis varnardo (sp?) might just decide to go dwight howard on the huskies in round 1 and drop a 19/22/7 on them.

*obviously, i love the big east, and have a lot of their teams advancing a long way. not so fast marquette. you can just stop right there. no dominic james, no marquette. take utah st, even though none of us can name a guy on that team.

*if ty lawson's toe is really hurt, carolina has no chnace to win this thing. if any team gets dejuan blair in trouble, pitt can't win this thing. if mempis has to shoot free throws to win a game, they're done too.

*butler is good. very good. they have one of the top three freshman in the country, some white dude i would call hummel 2.0, but he might be better than hummel. i say they take down lsu and give carolina a game in round 2.

*let's knock off this crap about whether syracuse will be rested or exhausted when the tourney begins. these are young kids playing in the dance with almost a week of rest. you think they won't be ready for the dance? sweet 16 for sure for jhonny and mullet boy and woman face puncher and worst free throw shooter ever.

*ok, i'll give my final four teams later...riggs just came into the bathroom to get me off the john. apparently it is wired to an explosive device.

22 comments:

rob said...

the vcu over ucla over vcu backlash backlash has come full circle. which means the rams will win.

TJ said...

Can't bring yourself to pick against the CAA, can you?

rob said...

no. no, i can't.

TJ said...

Understood - you could tell me Siena's three best guys are out with SARS and I'm still picking the Saints.

rob said...

in reality, collison vs. maynor will be fun to watch, but the fact that ucla has someone who can match up with maynor is a problem for vcu. vcu's supporting cast will tell the tale - if garry shandling has another game like the one he had in the caa final, we'll see vcu in the second round.

TJ said...

I guess rob forgot to let Whit in on the plan...

Whitney said...

There's a plan?

jerome said...

um, abbreviated?

TJ said...

Whit, it's called the Marshall Plan. Check with Ad Hoc Jerry on that one.

And Work Jerry, settle down...I like to hide in the john from real work. I'm thinking you might understand that more than most. Should we go back to Dub?

TJ said...

You know, Jermaine Stewart, you don't HAVE to take your clothes off to have a good time, but it sure as hell helps.

TR said...

I would have picked 'Cuse to suffer a major letdown in the tourney, but 'Zona is the worst of the 6 seeds. I like Oklahoma big in that bracket, no matter how well Lawson's digits are responding.

And I think Texas could give Duke a hard time. I love the Oliver Miller impostor they have. I always root for the guys who are so fat they don't look like they should be wearing basketball unis.

TJ said...

TR, Zona St?

And no way...the James-less #6 seed Marquette team is a shell of its former self.

jerome said...

back to the Dub? Hmm......

TJ said...

OK, I had decided to do only one bracket this year...but then I just ended up with this Final Four:
Wake
Mizzou
Nova
Cuse

I think I might do a second bracket.

TJ said...

Hey Doug Gottlieb, I know it was super cool (gay) when you wore your shorts backward Kris Kross-style, but LSU aint beating Butler.

Oh yeah, nice job being the 2nd most famous athlete to be tossed by Notre Dame.

Shlara said...

I just checked in to G:TB for the first time today. TJ, are you serious about where you typed this post? I actually gagged when I read the first paragraph.

TJ said...

Shlara, my dear, this is my Sgt. Peppers...

TJ said...

Listen, I know it's not NBA talk time, but Boston being the 2 or 3 seed should work in their favor (sorry Mark).

rob said...

shlara, i had no idea you were such a shrinking violet.

TJ said...

For the hundredth time, LaceDarius is not even remotely a name

Whitney said...

Shlara- to TJ, decorum is how to lay out your apartment. He's something of a foil to the style, grace, and class I bring to Gheorghe.

Shlara said...

It's no secret that I'm a big Obama fan...but even if I wasn't, I would think the ESPN video of him picking his brackets in the WH was really cool.

And, is Kwame Brown really the leading scorer at the half?