Two Recurring Features
And a Doofus Dancing (hee, hee)
If you're a regular G:TB reader, you know that we've got a handful of recurring features that may or may not recur. (Also, if you're a regular G:TB reader, you should probably get out more. See the world - it's magical this time of year.) It's my distinct pleasure in this season of wonder to combine a pair of them in celebration of my new favorite sports franchise. Bite Me Randy Newman, meet Know Your Minor League Mascot.
The Richmond Braves vacated their home of 43 years after the 2008 season, relocating to Gwinnett County, GA and leaving the Capital of the Confederacy without a longtime staple of its local sports scene. The good folks of the CAA's hometown didn't take long to find a new tenant for The Diamond, inking a deal with the San Francisco Giants after just one dormant summer.
This is where it gets good. The eminently wise management of the Richmond AA Eastern League franchise crowdsourced the team's name. And the fine, whimsical, people of Central Virginia eschewed the obvious themes (the War of Northern Aggression, slightly offkilter gentility, mild and dated racism - the Braves were originally called the Crackers) for a truly inspired choice. Friends, I give you the Richmond Flying Squirrels.
Team: Richmond Flying Squirrels
League: Eastern (AA)
Affiliation: San Francisco Giants
Mascot: To Be Named on December 20
Self-Absorbed East Coast Elitist Commentary: Truly self-absorbed, in this case, and the tangential tie-in to Randy Newman. As many of you know, my collegiate (and in many circles, current) nickname was Squirrel. (Because of my quickness and cunning, natch - or, possibly, because my freshman roomate was exasperated by the mess I made in our room and likened it to a squirrel's nest. Either way.) In an interesting aside, my father's college buddies called him Ratto because he was a biology major who completed his thesis on the mating and feeding habits of wild mice. My daughters Chipmunk and Chinchilla couldn't be happier about the family's rodent heritage.
Richmond itself holds a special place in my heart, for a number of reasons. I met my wife there, in an extremely random turn of events, as neither of us lived in the area. William & Mary's once-in-a-lifetime-so-far run in the CAA Tournament happened at the Richmond Coliseum. The girl I dated right before I met my wife lived in Richmond. (I seem to be lucky with women in Richmond. Why the hell am I just realizing this now? Not to get all Tiger Woodsy or anything.)
Where was I? Hell, in all the furry declamation, I lost my place. In any case, Bite Me, Randy Newman, and save me a seat on Opening Day, Flying Squirrels.
Gheorgheness Quotient: 77/77. Best. Nickname. Ever. Like I'm giving the Flying Squirrels any other rating.