Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Our Namesake Selling Sh*t In His Native Land...and Native Tongue

Zoltan dug this up yesterday, and frankly it's enjoyable enough as is, but since we're an enterprising lot here at G:TB, I first thought I'd take a crack at translating the ad for you our loyal reader. This was the best I could muster:

"Hi there. Are you a large person? Pleasantly plump? A little on the hefty side, perhaps? Well, let's face it: Are you FAT? When you go jogging, do you leave pot-holes? When you make love, do you have to give directions? At the zoo, do the elephants throw YOU peanuts? Do you look at a menu and say 'OK'? Well, now, you can eat all you want, because at Gheorghe Muresan's "Tall & Fat" stores, we've got you covered. That's right. Fine woolen, and woolen-blend suits and sport coats, in all the larger sizes - husky, stout, extra-stout, and the new Hindenburg line. And for you ladies we have caftans, muumuus, and our own exclusive A-frame in all colors and patterns. Yes, we have miles and miles of fabric. So take it from me, Gheorghe Muresan, if you want to look thin, you hang out with fat people."

Then realizing I don't speak a lick of Romanian, I thought to walk a few cubes down and ask one of my colleagues who just happens to be from Romania (and also happens to have the same first name as Mr. Muresan) to take a crack at translating this for us. Here's the ad...the proper translation is beneath the clip:



"I always had a hard time finding something to fit me...

...A suit...
...or shoes...
...Or a car sized for me...

... But I found something sized for me...

The interest rate on Volksbank deposits...

...A supersized interest rate... [ding!]

[show numbers]

[squeeze girl]"


So, there you have it folks...super exciting stuff, eh? Carry on.

12 comments:

TR said...

"You're tall and fat!"

"And you're short and stupid. Gimme my pencil back."

TJ said...

The other translation that didn't make it into the post...

Gheorghe: Tired of not being able to find clothes that fit? I know I was. That's why I started Gheorghe's Big and Tall Man Shop. If your portly or tall, you'll find a friendly atmosphere brimming with personalized and expert service.

Customer: Hey Gheorghe? How's the weather up there?

Gheorghe: Very fair...like our prices!

Mark said...

I get jokes.

zoltan said...

The pause for a goofy smile at 0:19 kills me.

Mark said...

For a second, I thought Pedro was getting out of that jam.

Whitney said...

Well, the Yankees are back on top. Congrats to TJ, TR, and legions of people with back hair everywhere.

Whitney said...

Memorandum from the fan base of New York Yankees to that of the Boston Red Sox:

You guys enjoyed the last five years, but really -- you call that arrogance, entitlement, and massive bandwagoning? We fucking invented those concepts! In short order we're going to take them to new heights.

Okay, lemmings, take off the B caps and put back on the NY's. That is all.

P.S. 27!

P.P.S. Did you happen to hear us mention 27?!

Jerry said...

Wait, Hideki Matsui doesn't speak English?

Whitney said...

Why, were you thinking about having him over for dinner? Asian athletes are just as dumb as American athletes.

Jerry said...

Can we get some Rollins or Victorino interviews?

Jerry said...

He's been here for 7 years. How the hell does he survive? You don't have to be a genius to learn English. For proof, just go outside and start talking to somebody.

TJ said...

Jerry, the guy who still kills me is Soriano. That motherfucker speaks Spanish AND Japanese, but still can't speak English.