Friday, April 17, 2009

"Kyle, I hate you, I want you to die..."

I am quite certain more than a few Kansas City Royals fans muttered those words around 9:55 PM CST Wednesday night. And they weren't directed at the young man in the green hat to the right. No sirree, Bob...they were directed at none other than Kyle Lynn (figures) Farnsworth, a man I have had the honor and privilege to "root" for as well.  Wednesday night was par for the course for Kyle, the man with the career 4.52 ERA and 1.41 WHIP.  He managed to give up three runs while getting only one out in relief for the Royals.

On the season, Kyle the Lead Obliterator has made four appearances.  In those stellar trips to the mound, this is his line:
3IP, 6H, 6ER, 1 HR allowed, 2BB, 0-2 record, 16.20 ERA, 2.40 WHIP

For his career:
The aforementioned 4.52 ERA and 1.41 WHIP, as well as a 30-50 record, 27 saves (excellent) and 23 blown saves (bogus), and let's not forget the 113 HR allowed.

The man is a menace to any bullpen he sets foot in.

21 comments:

rob said...

i love this very much. teejay's irrational farnsworth hatred is one of my favorite things. also, french toast, the sound of a basketball swishing through a net, and orangutans.

T.J. said...

This hatred is in no way irrational. I suggest you go take a look at that baseball reference page again.

Jerry said...

Getting back to Dave Terry,

I can still see the look on Teejay's face right before he unleashed that one for the first time. It was a look that said, "I have, inside my head, the single funniest joke that anyone has ever told." It was bursting out of his mouth and ears. He was grabbing somebody by the shoulder (probably Greg) just to balance himself so that he'd be able to blurt out the words.

That was a great day. One for the ages, as Jim Nantz would say.

T.J. said...

And the choice of "lunch" that day sure didn't hurt.

Jerry said...

It's the ultimate "you had to be there" both physically and mentally. And maybe spiritually.

rob said...

can we get a cliff's notes version, as inadequate as that may be, given the apparently world-shaking nature of this comedic outburst?

TR said...

The thing about Farnsworth that helps his rep is that he will absolutely throw a ball at the head of any opponent, if that opponent's pitcher threw at one of his guys. He'll also be the fastest sprinter out of the pen in a brawl, and the most likely to throw a haymaker at anybody in a different uniform.

My favorite memory of Darryl Strawberry is when he went ghetto on Armando Benitez after Benitez drilled Tino b/w the shoulder blades. After benches cleared, Darryl somehow got his hands on Benitez in the O's dugout and went apeshit on the guy. You always love a teammate that will do that to a foe.

Not sure how/if the Straw tangent is related to Farnsworth's suckitude...

TR said...

So I'm about to go on a 4 PM interview on a Friday afternoon that happens to be the nicest day of the year.

Blessing or curse?

rob said...

show some moxie - tell the interviewer that you'd prefer to have the interview outside.

TR said...

"Perhaps you and I can take this chat down in the main atrium of Grand Central and continue it over a black-and-white cookie and a couple tall boys. Does that sound like something you'd be interested in?

"Why are you walking away?"

T.J. said...

Looks like Joba had a tough day.

TR said...

My 4 PM appt just got pushed back to...4:20 PM. I like where this is going.

Now it's back to cranking the Crue's Wild Side in a stairwell, a la Dwight Schrute.

zman said...

You should refuse to work with someone who won't drink tallboys with you.

zman said...

This gets funny at the 2:30 mark.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqjoY51buf8

T.J. said...

Does anyone actually know a Kansas City Royals fan?

Whitney said...

Teejay, we live on the east coast and the Royals haven't won a title in 25 years. Plus they don't have any bandwagon caché . Do you know any Brewers/Twins/Rangers/A's/Blue Jays/Diamondbacks/Astros/Angels fans?

Whitney said...

The Smothers Brothers are still alive and touring?? I'd have bet against that!

T.J. said...

Out of that entire group, I know one Brewers fan.

rob said...

sox wearing alternate caps tonight. i do not approve.

Whitney said...

Two months later, I just saw this post. And I laughed, especially at:

"TJ – You have the name of a 10 year old and the attention span of a 5 year old."

...not to mention a A Few Good Men reference. Right one cue. Before the fact.

zman said...

I went to high school with a Blue Jays fan. His family was from Toronto.

I approve of Brad Penny's effort. Dunkin' Donuts just ran the worst musical ad in baseball history.