Yes, I have an unhealthy obsession with the luckiest man in the history of the United States criminal justice system. So of course I would know that 14 years ago today, on Sunday, June 12, 1994, Orenthal James Simpson went to the McDonald's drive-thru (in his Bentley) with Kato Kaelin around 9pm (cheap bastard even had Kato pay) and just over an hour later was gruesomely murdering his ex-wife Nicole Brown Simpson and her waiter "friend" Ron Goldman.
As Whitney so eloquently put it when we were helping O.J. find "Charlie, the Real Killer", "it's difficult to justify continually making light of a brutal double homicide, but this caricature of a human being warrants tongue-in-cheek mockery at all times." He sure does.
In that light, I present to you this ancient commercial starring today's featured double murderer (and an innocent 1970 Chevrolet Nova), wishing I had the YouTube editing skills to splice in some "Christine" footage (with Rollie Fingers look-alike Fred Goldman happily playing the Arnie Cunningham role):