Tuesday, December 02, 2008

The Twelve Days of Gheorghe-mas

In these, the most holy and wondrous of times, the G:TB team wishes you and yours a joyous and extremely ridiculous holiday season.

Today, in our 1,000th post, we return to our annual tradition, bringing the world the Twelve Days of Gheorghe-mas:

On the first day of Gheorghe-mas
Big Gheorghe gave to me
A fat guy in a jer-sey

38 comments:

rob said...

liberty is just kicking the shit out of the caa. gracious.

TJ said...

I look like Hot Plate Williams in that photo. Good god.

rob said...

well, in your defense, low-angle camera shots are not slimming. and you're fat.

Rhymenocerous said...

You've always been more of a Paul Mokeski than a Hot Plate Williams to me.

TJ said...

Billy Curley maybe?

rob said...

jack sikma

rob said...

edited because whitney's a homophobe.

zoltan said...

I never realized how freakishly small TJ's head is in relation to the rest of his body.

TJ said...

Seriously, why the additional spacing?

rob said...

because whitney's a homophobe.

and blogger sucks. can we move this freaking thing already? and where's the podcast?

rob said...

not to get off on a rant here, but that scumbag saxby chambliss is gonna win today. white people are stupid.

zoltan said...

And where are the curtains? Who is the House/Blog Manager?

Whitney said...

It's not being a homophobe to say, "Don't be so flamboyantly gay, Rob."

Oh, wait. Maybe that is. My bad.

Mark said...

Does anybody else remember that Bill Raftery used to call Curley the "Irish Lunchbucket"?

I think I'm going to start calling TJ that. And Rob, don't call TJ fat, or out of shape for that matter. Greg did a few weeks ago and TJ still hasn't recovered.

TJ said...

I did enjoy Mark selling Greg out and forwarding me that email though. Good to see profiteering still occurring.

Dave said...

redd foxx coincidence was just that, whitney.

TJ does have a really small head in proportion to his body (or perhaps it's foreshortening.)

You know what they say:
small head=small brain.

Rhymenocerous said...

So I guess TJ's small head makes him White Beetlejuice? The nickname also works because he's wearing a Juice jersey.

So the circle is complete. At least for White Beetlejuice.

Geoff said...

What, exactly, would you say makes Saxby a scumbag?

Jerry said...

I gave him that jersey.

Geoff said...

For example, if you had said the same about Norm Coleman I would have quietly been on my way...

Geoff said...

And Jerry...and...

Jerry said...

And GREG noticed that THE NAME on the back was SPELLED INCORRECTLY

rob said...

saxby's campaign against max cleland was one of the more repugnant in a long list of repugnant rovian gambits. that's my beef with saxby. also, his name is saxby. that's nearly as bad as whitney.

Whitney said...

Other Whitneys and I rag the hell out of people named Saxby! Yeah!!

Mark said...

Every time I read Saxby I think of Zaxby's (eerily similar to Guthrie's in their locations, chicken and sauce), and I get hungry. And I'm not even stoned...yet.

TJ said...

RELAX GUY

Whitney said...

Saxby's Wikipedia page:

"Chambliss ran for the Senate in 2002, defeating the Democratic incumbent, Max Cleland, a decorated Vietnam veteran and triple amputee.

Chambliss focused on the issue of national defense and homeland security during his campaign, and released an attack ad that included Osama bin Laden and Saddam Hussein, highlighted Cleland's record on the issues of war and terrorism. Cleland was one of the senators who had blocked the passage of the homeland security bill by voting against the bill.

Chambliss received criticism from Democrats and Republicans for this ad, pointing out that he, who hadn't served in the Vietnam War due to receiving military deferments, had attacked a Vietnam War veteran who lost three limbs during his service for not being tough enough on issues of war and homeland security. Republican Senator John McCain of Arizona said of one ad, "It's worse than disgraceful, it's reprehensible;" Senator Chuck Hagel of Nebraska said the ads were "beyond offensive to me."

Despite this controversy Chambliss won the election, receiving 53 percent of the votes to Cleland's 46 percent."


I guess that's what Rob was referring to with "white people are stupid"?

TJ said...

And Dave, you're being removed from the G:TB letterhead.

Whitney said...

Scenes from Teejay's past...

Kid in Bank: Hey, Mom! It's the guy who robbed the bank.
Tommy: I didn't rob any bank.
Kid in Bank: Oh, yeah, right. Like it was some other real fat guy with a tiny head.
Tommy: I got a tiny head?

TJ said...

I have the shoulder/head combo of the guy from the waiting room scene in Beetle Juice. If that's what Rhymo was referencing, he's spot on.

TJ said...

Let's be honest, discovering that a guy with a double major in Chemistry and Economics spelled OJ's last name wrong on a replica jersey had to be one of the funniest moments in my life.

TJ said...

Economics? Or Finance? Doesn't matter I guess...still funny.

zoltan said...

I hope the Rhymenocerous takes heed of this before his next trip to Uganda:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20081128/od_afp/ugandacrimeoffbeat_081128190419

zoltan said...

I suck.

http://tinyurl.com/6mbn36

Rhymenocerous said...

My Beetlejuice reference was to the frequent guest on Howard Stern. He's a little African-American guy with an abnormally small head for his body. He stands under 5' tall, yet he smokes butts and drinks. And he HATED Hank the Angry Drunken Dwarf (God rest his soul). The two of them used to fight all the time when they were on together.

One more thing - you can rent the real Beetlejuice for your function. He will attend your bachelor party for a small fee. Not a joke.

Here's a youtube clip of TJ's alter ego. I'm sure they would get along well together:

www.youtube.com/watch?v=qU11WfGBfLo

Mark said...

Pretty sure I said this before but, here goes:

I stayed at a Residence Inn in downtown Cleveland one summer while I was interning with Octagon. One weekend, there was a pimp's convention in town and many of the the pimps were staying at the RI. Unaware of this, I came home drunk one Saturday night and ended up meeting both Don Magic Juan and Beetlejuice (separately). Beetlejuice is frightening in person and could barely walk when I ran into him.

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amanda young said...

Oh wow! this guy must be santa clause! Merry Christmas Santa! Amanda Vanderpool