Twelve Days of Gheorghe-mas: On the 6th Day

On this most mundane of hump days, allow the splendor of G:TB to get you through your work day:

On the sixth day of Gheorghe-mas
Big Gheorghe gave to me
Six gifts worth giving
Fiiiiive(ish) feeeet of height
Four awful words
Three Richmond wins
Two sweet 'stache photos
And a fat guy in a jer-sey

Gifts are generally considered fun. Some folks, like us at G:TB, are more into the "getting" of gifts than the "giving" of them, but the whole process is usually kinda fun, especially when the gift-giving is done to the special lady in your life. Or to your wife.

So we celebrate Day 6 with a sextet of holiday gift ideas, ranging from the cerebral to the less cerebral. With Festivus only fourteen days away, you'll want to get your shopping done before you need to prepare your list of grievances for airing.

Gift 1: Leinenkugel' s Sunset Wheat Beer
Quite simply, this is the most delicious beer I've come across since I first met the Yuengling brand in the late 1990's. Known as Leinie's, these Wisconsin beers are perfect on hot summer days, and they continue their trend of deliciousness this winter. Buy a 6-pack of them for someone you love. Or for your wife.

Gift 2: Music
Although the audience of G:TB still awaits reviews of a recent epic release, there is still a lot out there that is worth purchasing. In the "worth buying" category, we lump the following: The new Killers (stick to sports chats and ignore your horrendous musical tastes, Bill Simmons), any Killers you don't own (even Sawdust is worth it), the new Hold Steady, The Gaslight Anthem's "The '59 Sound" (so in the wheelhouse of the elder editors' tastes that it's almost eerie), the new Metallica and, of course, the new Slipknot.

Gift 3: Books
Continuing the trend of "things you can lazily buy people on Amazon.com", I present some of the best things I've read recently that I recommend highly. Or sober. "The Gargoyle" by Andrew Davidson, "The Best Game Ever" by Marc Bowden, "The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao" by Junot Diaz, "Boys Will Be Boys" by Jeff Pearlman, "The Great Railway Bazaar" by Paul Theroux and "Under the Banner of Heaven" by Jon Krakauer. This list of books I've read is the one positive thing I can show for myself as a newly minted suburban commuter.

Gift 4: Manliness
As men's men, the editorial staff of G:TB needs very little in terms of machismo. But we seek to help out you "lesser men" out there. So allow us to introduce you to a scintillating gift: A chest hair shirt. Ideal for the follically challenged brethren in our burgeoning readership.

Gift 5: Pure Genius
When you think genius and you think comedy and you think of DVD sets, you end up pontificating upon Frank Caliendo. Now you have the opportunity to get all the Caliendo you can swallow in one fell swoop. At the man's eponymous web site, you can buy a gift box containing two DVDs, chocolate and popcorn for a low price. Actually, you may not be guaranteed to get all of the popcorn and chocolate because Frank is packing the boxes himself. But you'll at least get the crumbs. And the DVDs.

Gift 6: Nudie Films
When shopping for the family, I've always found erotica to be a fun gift option. How am I versed enough to make a recommendation, you might ask? Well, I grew up in central NJ with a high school friend who worked in a video store (Yes, it was very much like Clerks). He showed me every disturbing movie offered for rent in this store. Among the deviant material proffered was a serious of films featuring a large, ebony woman named Bad Mama Jama (NSFW link). The films were tame, disturbing and funny at the same time, like most of the women roaming the campus of William & Mary. But the passion, the heartache, the thespian efforts (and the lesbian efforts) were noteworthy. Go indulge yourself today. Just not after you recently ate.