Monday, May 24, 2010

Back to the World of Living

Much like my Florida counterpart who's been hobbled by maladies and forced to watch an inordinate amount of TV, I have been putting in a lot of quality time with my electric box lately. A few observations from the world of sports and beyond.

I thought of the name Stan Mikita without immediately thinking of Wayne's World for the first time in a long time today. And that's about all I needed to get fired up for the Blackhawks in the NHL Finals. I'm not fired up for the finals, mind you, just for the fact that a historic franchise is in there. Old-time hockey! Just like Eddie Shore.

To self-bashing Red Sox fans, Sox-bashing Yanks fans, self-bashing Yanks fans and self-bashing Mets' fans: Shut yer pie holes up already. We have almost 120 games left. Can we at least wait until mid-June until we decided if the sky is falling on our favorite teams or our rivals? The Sox are 2.5 games out of the wild-card spot, the Yanks are currently in the wild-card spot, and the Mets are 3.5 games out of the wild-card spot. Jeez.

To David Stern: your two-day "travel" break between games 2 and 3 was an abomination, especially because I was lying in a quasi-coma on Thursday and Friday nights, begging for some hoops to entertain me and my glassy eyes. I hope both conference finals series end in 4 or 5 games so we have an extended delay until the finals and we can all wallow in the assinineness that is your playoff scheduling policy.

30 Rock brought the goods again all season. This season also brought what may have been the funniest scene in the show's history - Tracy Jordan crying in the ghetto stairwell, talking about his memories of the building he grew up in:

I watched a prostitute stab a clown!
Our basketball hoop was a ribcage.

A puppy committed suicide when he saw our bathroom!

A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's.

I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were both very drunk.

43 comments:

rob said...

you can stuff your 'jeez' in a sack, pal

zman said...

You still have an electric box?

TR said...

Yes. I believe you are familiar with it and call it "your girlfriend."

TR said...

No offense.

zman said...

I keep it in my closet along with your mammy.

d-train said...

anyone watch all of Lost last night?
haven't started, but kind of curious to know general opinions...terrible? not good? okay? good? awesome!

T.J. said...

It was all just Bob Newhart's dream, d-train.

d-train said...

d-train on his way to play in a charity golf outing in st. augustine. translation: beers. beers. and beers.

Squeaky said...

Was it Igor that mention, Hunger Strike the other day?

Well anyway, Pearl Jam and lead singer for Band of Horses signing it live.

http://tinyurl.com/38v6hgn

rob said...

that song doesn't have as much impact in sign language

Dave said...

holy shit. i'm a season behind on 30 rock, so i haven't seen that one yet-- but i could hear those quotes in tracy morgan's voice and they made me laugh out loud-- which is creepy, because i'm at the computer in the ISS (in school suspensions) room and there are two kids wondering what i'm chuckling at.

Dave said...

also, here's my sports reporting for the day: we went to a minor league baseball game with my kids (age four and six) on saturday night, and my kids' eyes aren't fast enough to follow a baseball that is pitched and then hit. i ended up watching them trying to watch the game, more than i watched the game (because baseball is so boring.)

Geoff said...

30 Rock definitely was back to where it was in season one this year after some weak episodes last season. The scene where Jack used John Phillip Sousa marches to attempt to kill the mood was a personal favorite.

Shlara said...

That episode of 30 Rock was emmy-worthy.

The scenes with Tracey remembering his childhood were epic.

Oh, and the hot guy in the wedding that Liz wanted to date until she found out that he likes to dress up in mascot costumes...hilarious.

And, LOST was VERY disappointing last night.

Dave said...

i loved the "Lost" finale. i can't believe they were all robots! programmed by giant ants! and the earth is filled with caramel! very satisfying. sorry about the spoilers.

mayhugh said...

Yes, Lost was great. The Waylon Jennings voice-overs were a nice touch.

T.J. said...

I'm so glad the Lawnmower Man just happened to survive...you know, in case Captain Oveur hadn't recovered.

Dave said...

i was just punished for my ironic "lost" comments-- i've never seen the show and five teachers just critiqued it for forty five minutes int he office. i tried to switch the subject to "madmen"-- cat and i watched the finale of last season last night and it was awesome.

T.J. said...

Dave also can't believe how "Mad About You" ended.

Dave said...

people have told my wife she looks like helen hunt.

T.J. said...

And you look like Richard Karn. Perfect.

Professor G. Truck said...

dave is much better looking that richard karn. he's also smart, funny, and very hip. i love his comments.

Dave said...

i like this mr. truck fellow!

zman said...

Mad Men is the shit. I've never seen Lost or 30 Rock. I tried to watch Family Guy for the first time last night but it just wasn't funny, I gave up after 3 minutes.

TR said...

Family Guy > South Park > Simpsons.

Give it more than 3 minutes, Zman. Try and find this episode to get a taste: To Live and Die in Dixie. The world wide web tells me it's Season 3, Episode 12.

Mark said...

I'm somewhat in the middle. Never watched Lost but love both Mad Men and 30 Rock and I'm catching up on the past season of each of them right now. Well, not at this exact moment but, you know, I'm in the process and such.

T.J. said...

It sounds like TR wants to ride side-car in my "Family Guy is Awesome"-cycle...so yeah, get on board Zman. And soon.

T.J. said...

TR, this is very random, but I made a "Super Devil" joke at work today...and I am pretty sure that is the episode you just told Zman to watch.

Geoff said...

Family Guy is funny. Zman--you're watching it wrong.

zman said...

My big problem is that I'm bad at calendars so I never know what day it is, let alone what's on and at what time. So I end up watching sports, whatever's on HBO, and random crap that's always on like Top Gear and River Monsters.

T.J. said...

You do not have a DVR or TiVo system?

zman said...

I'm too stupid to figure something like that out. I'm only good at two things.

Geoff said...

Are we almost out of one of them?

T.J. said...

OK, 100 people surveyed...top 5 answers are on the board (pls, someone jump in):

1. Jenga
2.

zman said...

http://tinyurl.com/yfp33hc

rob said...

2. body hair topiary

T.J. said...

3. the worm

zman said...

Yes! I carved my armpit hairs into elephants.

T.J. said...

Ah, so you're an Old Spice "Denali" guy...

zman said...

They have elephants in Alaska?

T.J. said...

I couldn't pick Fiji or Matterhorn, now could I?

zman said...

Didn't Hannibal Lecter take elephants through Alaska?

rob said...

new post - afternoon filler thanks to gormley.