Saturday, October 03, 2009

What the High School Kids are Watching

I did some research (which consisted of mentioning YouTube in Shakespeare class when we had some time to kill and then trying to follow the ensuing allusion laden conversation about various clips) and I have determined that high school kids are watching YouTube. A lot of YouTube. In fact, if I mentioned something from YouTube, whether it was a particular clip (news reporter who turned ghetto after swallowing a fly, hip hop guy who gets whipped off a treadmill, Chad Vader) or a genre (guitar lessons, soccer ball tricks, fake injuries) everyone in class had seen it.

Here are a few of the clips they've been watching.

This one was particularly disheartening, because I've been meaning to do a fake injury video for YouTube for years now, but I've never gotten around to it (my pesky children always seem to need bathing and feeding), but apparently lots of other people have found the time to perfect the art of feigning an atrocious and bloody accident. I want to do one where I'm pretending to give a guitar lesson and I electrocute myself. Perhaps I still will, as my fake injury acting is pretty damn good.



I don't think this one is fake, but the young folks still love it.



They are also watching a show called Glee, which I have not seen, but I hear it's pretty funny-- from kids and adults alike-- and it features the big funny lesbian from Best in Show.






And they are also watching a show called Skins, which I have seen and highly recommend: it's sort of a British post-modern version of Saved by the Bell, if everyone who was on Saved by the Bell and all the writers of Saved by the Bell did a lot of acid. This clip is even trippier than the show-- all the regular trailers disallowed embedding.




Now here's what the adults are watching-- my high school buddies just sent me these clips, and they were well worth the forty seconds I invested in them.








I will refrain from my usual elitist rambling about aesthetics, art, and literature, and instead take great pleasure in the modern populist democracy of entertainment. Though we lose a few newspapers and the art of poetry and short-fiction, look at what we have gained. I will now go and work on my fake screams for my very own fake injury video-- hopefully the final cut will be ready before the end of Movie Month.

158 comments:

Mark said...

Do you know there's football on today, Dave?

Mark said...

It's Mark Month, Dave. Not Movie month.

Geoff said...

Teams from Washington, regardless of which one, suck in the red zone.

Mark said...

Those are two of the worst excessive celebration penalties you'll ever see.

Mark said...

I'm glad LSU won. It only adds to the hype for next week's game. Though, at my advancing age I'm not sure I can handle the stress of a night game game in Baton Rouge between LSU and Florida with both teams ranked in the top 5.

rob said...

we need to teach dave about timing. he's used to writing a sentence a day over at his place.

Geoff said...

Come on Huskies.

Whitney said...

I was going to beat Mark to the punch by insinuating that Geoff's last comment was an open invitation to portly boys, but it appears he willed Washington into overtime, so I will insist that Mark knock off such comments, at least for now.

Geoff said...

I like my boys like I like my salsa...chunky and hot.

Dave said...

the only amateur sports i watch are high school girls soccer games-- for obvious reasons.

we are stuck inside-- ian has bronchitis, so i wanted to share my research.

Whitney said...

Holy crap. USC dude leapt from the 5, through and over people, and gets into the end zone without a knee coming down. I . . . I can't do that.

Mark said...

Tennessee's uniforms make me Ill.

TR said...

Tremendous comments run by Mark today. 18 of 21 to close the last thread, followed by 4 of 5 to start this one. That's an 85% run for that period. Well done.

In that time, I watched the first 45 minutes of Away We Go on On Demand. Good times.

Mark said...

Thanks TR, Whitney just called me a lonely loser but i don't care. Im dedicated to keeping G:TB moving during fall Saturdays. It's easy, college football provides all the material I could ever need.

Whitney said...

Have you heard about the lonesome loser
Beaten by the queen of hearts every time
Have you heard about the lonesome loser
He's a loser, but he still keeps on tryin'

rob said...

speaking of losers, how tight are the tigers' sphincters heading into this afternoon's action?

Mark said...

Pink gloves and pink cleats are going to annoy the fuck out of me today. Not as much as Dave knocking my post below the fold with this filler yesterday but still, its going to be a bit much on my hungover eyes.

zoltan said...

Pink cleats? Is this the lingerie bowl?

Whitney said...

Tiger sphincters - reminds me of The Hangover, which I saw again the other day (and it holds up in repeat viewings).

Whitney said...

Gheorghe: The Blog, not exactly endorsed by the American Cancer Society. Or women.

Geoff said...

Mark, you gonna be around to live blog this cripple fight we've got before us today. I'm expecting 25,000 empty seats and booing during the first possession. Get psyched...

zoltan said...

I googled "nfl pink cleats" and now I get it. Like when MLB used pink bats. Apparently it's Deangelo Williams' idea. He lost three sisters to breast cancer. Sad story.

zoltan said...

NY's Fox affiliate has hands down the worst audio/video feed of any network in the country. It's like they're transmitting the sound with two soup cans and a length of string.

Geoff said...

Holy fuck. Skins sacked twice and a fumble out of the gate.

zoltan said...

The Chiefs unveiled their version of the Wildcat - the Wildcoathanger. Hay-oh!

mayhugh said...

Skins down 7? That's close to what they average a game.

Reed Doughty looks a shitload better this year than I remember him.

Geoff said...

This first quarter has been a new low for the Redskins...and that's saying something.

mayhugh said...

Jesus Clinton. Is it that hard to run upright?

mayhugh said...

Geoff, what odds would I have to give you for you to take "The Skins will execute a 95 yard drive right now."

Geoff said...

I'd take it at 75 to 1... Zorn might get fired at halftime.

Whitney said...

Yes! Bucs missed field goal! Yeah, baby!!

(When the best part of the game happens, you need to soak it in.)

mayhugh said...

Portis is useless out there. Campbell is over his head. Time to pull him.

Geoff said...

Fire Zorn, bench Campbell and put Portis out to stud.

Whitney said...

Dan Snyder just cleared out the owner's suite for Tantrum Time. That brie wheel is history.

Geoff said...

If they don't score points here its got to be Toddas Collins time.

Whitney said...

If they don't score some points here, it's gonna be Tom Collins time.

Geoff said...

Sam Rosen just said "something doesn't look right with Jason Campbell.". Hear hear. Hasn't looked right since Auburn.

Geoff said...

My first half has been brought to you by Guinness. My second half might be sponsored by Bushmills.

Whitney said...

What's even more disappointing is that one of the Skins' best players is out. Hunter Smith was playing as well as anyone, and there are going to be a lot of punts this year.

zoltan said...

Speaking of Tom Collins, you should try substituting genever for gin. Very refreshing. The Chiefs might be worse than the Redskins. Probably some sort of racist karmic thing catching up with both teams.

Geoff said...

Sweet merciful crap...that's two picks and a fumble for Campbell in a quarter and a half.

Whitney said...

Malcolm Kelly saw that Georgia-LSU game last night and tried to be AJ Green. Unfortunately, he came off like I'd look trying to mimic Lynn Swann's acrobatics after I'd put away 15 Dale's Pale Ales.

Whitney said...

Yes! Bucs missed field goal! Yeah, baby!!

(When the best part of the game happens, you need to soak it in.)

Whitney said...

Malcolm Kelly, having a bang-up game. Again. Thank you, Vinny!

Whitney said...

Oh my God. He hit the ref in the ear. Shoulda been another pick. When Campbell is on the run, he oughta throw lefty.

Geoff said...

I hate watching Jason Campbell play.

Whitney said...

Geoff, I can't imagine you'll have to for all that much longer.

Geoff said...

I'm excited for the postgame comments by the Skins when they talk about how they knew they were the better team even though they lost.

mayhugh said...

Dammit Carlos. Are you ever going to learn to catch?

Whitney said...

Carlos Rogers couldn't catch crabs with a boat full of crabpots, $200, and Mark's dick. Good players on good teams make that play. He's neither.

Whitney said...

Somewhere on this blog, somebody wrote, "Dear God, take the Bucs." That guy knew his shit.

Geoff said...

Players on the Redskins that I don't hate:
Chris Cooley
London Fletcher
Rock Cartwright

Mark said...

I'd like to say I'm encouraged by Josh Johnson's play but, the truth we all know this game is about the Skins being terrible. Like, historically fucking terrible.

Mark said...

In other news, I might be the worst fantasy owner of all time. If I sit a guy he's going to have a great game. Guaran-fucking-teed.

rob said...

for my diversion this week, i took the girls out shopping for their mother's birthday present during the skins game. intentionally. and it appears i should have made it a longer outing.

Geoff said...

Yeah, I thought this team had some heart and self-respect left. As always, I'm an asshole.

If we don't see Todd Collins in the second half, I'm rooting for the Bucs.

Without marked improvement in the second half, even a reasonable owner has to fire Zorn.

Geoff said...

Bring back Spurrier.

mayhugh said...

Marty.

Mark said...

Tommy Tuberville's available...

zoltan said...

You really don't want Todd Collins out there. Trust me. He's not good at football. He's affirmatively bad. Profootballreference.com has no stats for Collins for the 1998, 1999, and 2000 seasons. Either he didn't take a snap for 3 years or he was unemployed for 3 years. Regardless, it's 9 years later and he can't be more athletic than he was then.

mayhugh said...

It's not so much who is brought in, it's that there has to be some visible effort to change. There are absolutely no results on the field, so there's no down-side to who runs on to the field instead.

mayhugh said...

Oh sweet, I forgot the skins got the ball first...

zoltan said...

Oh, Todd Collins has plenty of downside. Not as much as Alex Van Pelt, but there's plenty of downside.

Geoff said...

Collins is 5-0 as the Skins starter is reg season games. I realize he still sucks...but the degree to which each Redskins player sucks is key.

mayhugh said...

5-12, 60 yards, 2 INT, 1 fum lost.

Todd would have to work pretty hard to be worse than that for a half.

Whitney said...

My Serenity Now moment was switching to the MLB network. Verlander is bringing it today.

Geoff said...

First and ten at the Bucs 40. I predict zero points.

mayhugh said...

They're saying BOO, not COOLEY...

mayhugh said...

What is Portis averaging right now, about 1.5 yards a carry?

Whitney said...

Good one, Mr. Mayhugh. Worth a chuckle.

Whitney said...

Timmy Wakefield not on the ALDS roster. That makes the Red Sox even harder to root for.

Geoff said...

It feels like the Skins D might score. That's really the only hope here...though I'm leaning towards rooting for a loss.

Whitney said...

I'm rooting for Dan Snyder to go hunting with Dick Cheney.

rob said...

tim wakefield's back is so badly hurt he can't tie his shoes. i love the man, but even he knows he shouldn't be on the roster. but cuddly kevin youkilis is, so there's your hook, whit.

Geoff said...

When Portis gets the handoff he immediately falls down. Its a joke.

rob said...

davis, nimble

Geoff said...

That Fred Davis pick is shaping up nicely.

mayhugh said...

This drive is almost inspiring.

rob said...

competence!

mayhugh said...

Fuck yeah. People looked like they were trying for that drive.

Geoff said...

That felt like splitting the atom.

zoltan said...

Have the Titans given up?

rob said...

forgive me. spoke too soon.

Geoff said...

Hahahahahaha...this team is a fucking joke.

mayhugh said...

I'm unphased. I think the D has things figured out. Of course, they still have to score again.

rob said...

mayhugh is also immune to the tides.

mayhugh said...

Well, my stuffed crust pizza just got here, too. So that might explain things.

Whitney said...

Jackpot!

mayhugh said...

Where did THAT come from?

Geoff said...

Didn't see that coming.

Whitney said...

I didn't see that coming! Awesome move by Moss, great ball by Campbell. My keyboard just tried to AutoCorrect that last sentence.

Whitney said...

I am laughing heartily at the uniformity of our responses and the consistency of our disillusion in this team.

Geoff said...

Swint has the Bucs and the points and he's getting a little nervous. Time for Johnson to throw another pick.

Whitney said...

ChiSox not going quietly. Someone in Detroit's gonna need a new set of pants.

Mark said...

I really want to like Raheem Morris. He's making it very, very hard.

Geoff said...

The Skins scored 16 pts in the third quarter. An embarrassment of riches.

Whitney said...

Does Randle El know that it's legal to catch a punt? Jackass.

mayhugh said...

Can I request that they score in the twenties or is that just plain greedy?

Geoff said...

Mayhugh, settle down. This team is still capable of losing by 20.

Mark said...

What could Campbell possibly have been thinking on that throw?

mayhugh said...

Byron Leftwich - looking a whole lot like Fat Albert.

mayhugh said...

Ever notice how no one seems to fumble against the Skins?

Whitney said...

A few plays ago was the Skins in a nutshell - big hit, dance + swagger by Washington defenders . . . 1st down, Tampa.

mayhugh said...

Good observation, Whit. Those two missed figgies looming large for the Bucs right now.

Whitney said...

Anybody NOT thinking that blocked PAT will cost the Skins the game?

TR said...

Chiefs are horrendous. And the Giants continue to soundly beat bad teams without looking like they're playing their best football.

Geoff said...

Fumbles are caused by effort. That's not in the Skins business plan.

Geoff said...

Boy, I question Morris kicking the fg here.

Whitney said...

Kansas City... Chiefs lying down against the Giants, Royals lying down against the Twins, and the Kings left town for the greener pastures of that booming metropolis Sacramento. Thank God for the barbecue.

rob said...

what are the odds zorn does something mindboggling here?

mayhugh said...

Yikes. I did not want a 4th and 1 here.

Geoff said...

I don't care if Hunter's injured. You punt. End of story.

mayhugh said...

Agree. Going for it here is criminally negligent.

Whitney said...

3rd and 5, 4 yard run. Seems like we've been seeing that since the Petitbon days. Norv, Martyball, Gibbs 2.0 - we love that play. The draw, the screen, anything but a 7-yard slant or out. Snyder's trying to get a patent on it and make a little cash off it.

Geoff said...

Admirable job by Suisham. If you can't stop Josh Johnson, you suck.

mayhugh said...

Ball game?

Geoff said...

That felt like going home with the ugliest chick in the bar.

Whitney said...

Holy crap - that drive, that quarterbacking, that playcalling, that result - very Redskinesque. The Bucs do suck.

mayhugh said...

I still hate this team.

Whitney said...

If that crud win takes the heat off this underpeforming, hideous team, then people are stupid and we might as well have lost.

TR said...

A-Rod with a grand salami and a 3-run jack to reach the 30/100 level on the season. Impressive. And extra satisfying b/c the 3 run tater came after the Rays intentionally walked Texeira with a guy on second to preserve the HR title for Pena. Bush league move by Madden. Faux-intellectual d-bag.

Geoff said...

I contend that it would have been better for the future of the team if they had lost.

rob said...

things are breaking nicely for the yankees - minny and detroit having to go late on tuesday, verlander having to pitch today. pretty much a bye into the alcs.

rob said...

also, is this where i come to complain about how lousy cbs.sportsline.com's servers are performing? fuckfaces.

rob said...

bengals just scored to tie the game at 20, but the browns blocked the pat to keep it tied. redskin-esque.

Whitney said...

Yesterday my younger daughter wet her pants when we were one block from home. Redskin-esque.

Whitney said...

Anybody else watching John Harbaugh have a Redskin-esque 4th quarter? He pissed away challenges and TO's terribly, then just ran McGahee off-tackle on 4th + 1 with no fullback. Stupid.

zoltan said...

Earlier today my cat was sitting on my couch next to me and she started licking her asshole. Redskinesque.

rob said...

harbaugh might be crazy like a fox. ravens moving at the two-minute timeout.

Mark said...

I'm watching Harbaugh and the raisins. He has been...less than impressive.

rob said...

joe flacco on the other hand, quite impressive.

Whitney said...

Michael Clayton just dropped a ball in the numbers to lose the game. Redskin-esque.

Whitney said...

Does Kyle Orton look like a slightly retarded version of Dave Grohl?

rob said...

why is tyler hansbrough on my television? i feel temporally dislocated.

rob said...

cincinnati's plays are being called by two 9 year-olds with an xbox.

Whitney said...

Cincinnati... where they are jealous of the good fortune in Kansas City. And 5-way chili doesn't hold up to KC 'cue.

Jerry said...

TD Darren Sharper and we're about to find out if there's a 2 minute warning in OT.

Jerry said...

For any Whiskers in the audience, there is a 2 minute warning in OT. And we've hit in Ohio.

rob said...

who won the chelsea/liverpool game today, jerry? i'm too lazy to look it up.

Jerry said...

Chelsea, 2-0. Arsenal beat Blackburn 6-2. That was fun.

Whitney said...

And I just re-read this -- TR, why is intentionally walking Teixeira with men on second and third so obviously about denying him the HR title? There was a righty on the hill, Teixeira's a switch hitter and A-Rod's a righty. Both are dangerous, but one offers the platoon advantage (and is historically more prone to choking). Plus now you have a force play at any base. Did anyone outside the think tank known as the YES booth raise an eyebrow?

It's so very New York Yankee fan to suggest -- unless there is additional evidence to the contrary, and I'll gladly retract this rant if there is -- that it was really about the HR title. Number one, the universe clearly revolves around the New York Yankees, and everything non-Yankees do is focused on hating the Yankees. Baseball logic can be cast aside; nothing is without its ulterior motive.

Second, only a Yankee fan would take the best record in baseball, the best roster $200MM+ can buy, the best shot of a World Series trophy in 2009, and a season-ending exclamation point of a 10-run inning to smoke those uppity Rays . . . and come away with, "We shoulda had the home run title, too, but that 'bush league' Maddon (misspelled for extra cred) gypped us out of it."

The entitlement is back, Bronx fans!! So thick and rich, you can drizzle it on your gyro!

Whitney said...

Sorry, TR. That's pretty much just me bitching about the Mets in not so many words.

zoltan said...

I like gyros. Can't get good ones outside of NYC.

Jets' D looked stout on that goalline stand.

rob said...

the mets' season finally broke whitney.

rob said...

wow, i nailed it

Whitney said...

Also, some friends in town went to Europe for a week and asked us to watch their daughter. For a week. Who knew Damien had a sister?

rob said...

man, marion barber runs like a tazmanian devil. dude is tough. unredskin-like.

rob said...

tony romo's pocket presence makes me happy.

Mark said...

Thank you Whitney. Your rant was probably the highlight of my weekend. A tour de force.

Mark said...

So...Mark Sanchez...maybe not the next Joe Montana.

zoltan said...

Is there a reason why Shannon Sharpe doesn't have a speech therapist?

Whitney said...

But Mark Sanchez could be the next Joe Mantegna! Someone has GOT to fill those shoes. Horatio Sanz is a bust in that regard.

Whitney said...

Yeah, you guessed it. I took the kids out to a Mexican joint for the filming of a trailer for Problem Child 4, and when the waiter was taking drink orders, the tractor beam sucked me right in and I found myself involuntarily uttering, ". . . and a Herradura jumbo margarita." And they do not mess around with the drinks at that place. Yeah . . . think twice before you leave your next of kin with me for the weekend.

Whitney said...

Nice Bills for you, Zoltan.

zoltan said...

If Snyder fires Zorn and Wilson fires Jauron, I bet that Snyder will hire Jauron and Wilson will hire Zorn.

Geoff said...

Snyder should fire Zorn tomorrow. I'm guessing an NFL coach has never been fired midseason after a win. That'd be awesome. Is Marv Levy 90 years old yet?

TJ said...

Andrea Kramer's jacket tonight?

I mean, wow.

Lindasy Rosenwald said...

Nice blogging, My review is very good example.
Lindsay Rosenwald http://www.lindsayrosenwald.info/ Dr. Lindsay Rosenwald is one of the re-known venture capitalists and the hedge fund managers in the world.