Tuesday, August 19, 2008

An Olympic Performance to Remember

Now that we're a couple days past the magic, we can sit back and try to gauge the magnificence of the performance - the raw power, the dominance over the competition, the ability to step up and bring the goods. Yes folks, we are here to praise Liu "Muscles" Chunhong for her ballsy gold medal winning performance in women's weightlifting.

As predicted on this modest site two weeks ago, the Honger ran roughshod over the competition. Despite weighing only 69 kg (152 lbs for those of you who like your weights in US terms and your metric conversions without sarcasm), the Honger snatched 128 kg (282 lbs) and did a staggering clean-and-jerk of 158 kg (348 lbs). Both individual amounts are new world records.

So here's to you, Liu Chunhong. Though you may have a penis like Gheorghe, you have a heart like him too, so much so that we don't begrudge you for annihilating Gheorghe's Romanian competitors on your road to victory.

To all you smitten fans out there, no more yanky her wanky. After this tough competition, the Honger need food.

17 comments:

rob said...

i wish i could sell west virginia short this season. anyone care to make a wager?

Dennis said...

West Virginia wins the Big East. 12 Victory Golden Monkeys says so.

rob said...

you're on, provided you define 'wins the big east'. outright?

Rhymenocerous said...

Rob:

The Big East will be more mediocre thisyear than it was the last couple years. Pundits are way too hyped up on Pitt, Louisville looks like a mess, and it's hard to get a read on UConn and USF.

Rutgers was ranked 33 in SI's preview. That seems about right for them. They have an early game against Butch Davis' "who knows how good these guys are" Tar Heels, but they face a cream-puff schedule after that. Their out-of-conference schedule will get them to 8 wins, but they won't storm through conference play.

My point is that WVU should win the conference by default because nobody else looks like they can step up and snatch it away from them. And Pat White will continue to put up big numbers if he's healthy.

rob said...

pat white's awesome, as is noel devine. i'm just completely underwhelmed by bill stewart.

Rhymenocerous said...

What coaches whelm you?

rob said...

urban meyer whelms the shit out of me, much as i hate to admit it.

rob said...

i also like the cut of chris petersen's jib

Mark said...

I covered the joy of hurricanes earlier, but what we had today was the rarely seen "olympic hurricane"...good times

rob said...

that aaron ross/sanya richards piece on nbc actually lowered my quality of life. i'm suing.

mayhugh said...

What about the segment on Kite Fighting?

Rhymenocerous said...

I haven't tested this formula, but I'm pretty sure this is how it goes:

Alicia Keys + Rashida Jones = Lolo Jones

Geoff said...

She hid it well on the Office, but Rashida Jones is disturbingly roomy through the hips. She's got the ass and thighs of a 200lb woman.

Rhymenocerous said...

What Geoff means is that she's "Pam Oliver-esque"...

Geoff said...

Google images has some pretty damning shots of Pam O's caboose. Osi Umenyiora is intrigued...

rob said...

fortunately, i was watching red sox/orioles during the kite fighting piece. that will not be part of my lawsuit.

Geoff said...

I caught the kite fighting piece. It was spectacularly vapid.