Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Lagarfljotsormurinn!

The headlines out of Iceland this week are largely focused on the impending eruption of the island's Barbardunga volcano, so you'd be forgiven if you missed the far more exciting announcement made by a local government commission in Lagarfljot.

The commission, convened in 2012, announced earlier this week that a video captured by local farmer Hjortur E. Kjerulf is authentic, thus largely confirming the existence of Lagarfljotsormurinn, a legendary Icelandic sea monster. In the video, seen below, a large serpentine object moves across the surface of the water, before leaping clear of the lake's surface to snag a cow from the shore and swallow it whole. That last part is alleged - some of the video is a bit grainy.



According to local legend, Lagarfljotsormurinn is generally described as 90 meters long, with numerous humps. The creature is alleged to have been seen both in the water and coiled up on land.

Finnish researcher Miisa McKeown was extremely skeptical of the commission's initial findings until the existence of a second video (seen below) offered what appears to be incontrovertible evidence of the sea monster's existence.

45 comments:

rob said...

eye status: completely swollen shut. diagnosis now poison ivy vs. insect bite. it's a motherfucker.

zman said...

I saw something about this on The discovery channel. The animal in the grainy video is a Greenland shark, unless you're a cryptozoologist in which case it's whatever you want it to be.

rob said...

killjoy

Clarence said...

Hey, Rob, I hope your eye heals quickly and completely.


--OR--


I hope you wear a bad assed eye patch from now on. And talk like a pirate.

Danimal said...

pics please rob

Mr. Truck said...

i need you to post a picture of the eye, pus included, before i believe you. i am withholding sympathy until then.

rob said...

here you go, danimal:

http://ow.ly/i/6UPV9

T.J. said...

lookin' good

Danimal said...

Hey Nowwww!!!!

Casual Wednesday at Reuters today? Or are you staying at home so as not to scare people?

rob said...

staying at home because i can't drive with one eye. convenient, in that it lets me hang out in my pajamas for most of the day.

Greg said...

It's similar to the jaguar shark that ate Esteban.

Clarence said...


You winkin' at me, boy?

Squeaky said...

Damn that blows, Rob.

Just received a work email with a hashtag in it. For some reason this irritates me.

Clarence said...

But seriously, I hope it gets better soon.

Shlara said...

I love the pirate eye patch idea!!!

Marls said...

A work email with a hashtag should be a firing offense unless you work at twitter.

I still think Rob got in a bar fight.

Mark said...

You wear pajamas? Of course you do.

rob said...

not to sleep, mark. just to lounge about in the mornings.

mayhugh said...

That's fairly ridiculous Rob. Do you have poison ivy anywhere else or just your eye? And if just your eye, how the hell does that happen? Wearing gloves and scratch your eye?

mayhugh said...

Rob has kids. He can't just walk around naked all day.

Danimal said...

I think we have another spousal abuse victim here. Rob....we are here for you. Tell the truth. Don't be ashamed. It's not your fault.

Sorry...that's probably in poor taste.

rob said...

little bit on my right arm, left shin, and waistband area, mayhugh. it's really fucking weird, man.

Clarence said...

Right arm and the, ahem, "waistband area," I think we get what that's about. The other places...

mayhugh said...

I have a theory: Rob is a suburbanite, he's got kids. He probably found a hula hoop in his yard. When no one was looking, he picked it up and tried it out, tainting his ankle and "waistband" area in the process. Makes perfect sense.

mayhugh said...

The Hula Hoop was obviously covered in Poison Ivy

zman said...

FYI, Friday is National Talk Like A Pirate Day. Seriously:

http://www.talklikeapirate.com/piratehome.html

Make this happen rob.

rob said...

i shall talk like andrew mccutcheon.

Mark said...

Jameis Winston is a terrific QB and quite often a spoiled idiot in everyday life.

Mark said...

Andrew McCutcheon is from Ft. Meade, FL so it shouldn't be hard to pull that off.

Squeaky said...

How does one 'taint' their ankle?

Donna said...

I recall an incidence of poison ivy back at school!

Dave said...

yikes! why isn't government working harder to eradicate that stuff? is there a vaccine yet?

Dave said...

a vaccine might be ready in two years, it's in stage one clinical trials. no help there.

Clarence said...

I remember the poison ivy outbreak in college as well. Afflicted just two individuals, as I remember.

Anywho...

Poison ivy, poison ivy
Late at night while you're sleepin'
Poison ivy comes a'creepin' Around

You're gonna need an ocean
of calamine lotion
You'll be scratchin' like a hound
The minute you start to mess around

Poison ivy, poison ivy...

"Poison Ivy," The Coasters, 1959

rob said...

donna, i'm not touching that comment.

and clarence, you're telling me it can creep? is there anywhere we're safe from that menace?

mayhugh said...

That eye looks like it needs some steroids. And oatmeal baths.

rob said...

we got the steroids working. there's been some improvement over the day. i'm also benching like 250.

Greg said...

"Muscle Squirrel"

Greg said...

250 pieces?

Greg said...

I've got free Mets tix tonight. Do I bother going?

Clarence said...

Yes!!!!


No.

Greg said...

speaking of free tix, I got to see Lorde at the United Palace Theater on Monday...pretty good show but I'm glad the tix were free.

But the United Palace Theater is a fucking awesome venue; very ornate with lots of intricate gilded surfaces. I imagine it was even more impressive in the 1930's & 1940's. It's way up on 175th & Broadway though.

zman said...

Operation Ivy?

Dave said...

my most successful coaching tactic this year was when i taught my players how to identify poison ivy, which is rampant behind the track and also under the south river bench.

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