Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Bite Me, Randy Newman

Jose Altuve is the starting second baseman for the Houston Astros. He's a two-time all-star, and he just won the American League batting title, hitting .341 and leading the league in hits, with an Astros franchise record 225. He also lead the AL in stolen bases with 56. Houston management initially wanted to bench Altuve for the Astros' season-finale to ensure he won the batting title, but he successfully argued his way into the lineup, then went 2-for-4 to seal his place in history.

Jose Altuve is also the shortest player in major league baseball, standing 5'5". BMRN alumnus Dustin Pedroia towers above him, even as they now share one of the blogosphere's most coveted accolades.


Altuve's stature is not only inspirational for diminutive kids of all ages, he's also become part of the lexicon. Astro broadcasters now use 'Altuve' as shorthand for measurement. As in, "that homer traveled 156 Altuves". Careful GTB readers already knew that, of course, as we've got the short dude beat fairly well covered.

Huge(ish) congratulations from our team to Jose's. We'll be expecting big things next year. In a manner of speaking.

53 comments:

Whitney said...

Rob and I are going to have pretty much that same Watt/Altuve photo from Homecoming this year. Except it will be a beer instead of a bat in my hand.

TR said...

Holy crap. Go on-line and watch the trailer for PTA's new film Inherent Vice. Looks amazing.

T.J. said...

then go watch the trailer for Taken 3, just 'cause

Dave said...

my kids are very excited about the new dumb and dumber movie.

mayhugh said...

Inherent Vice looks like a cross between Lebowski and LA Confidential. If that's the case, I'm fine with it.

Greg said...

Taken 3: No Take-backs

zman said...

There will be pig.

rob said...

cnbc is reporting that the cdc just announced the first us-based case of ebola. if we can all survive the panic, we'll probably make it.

Greg said...

Ebola, like Wu Tang ain't nothing to fuck with

rob said...

i can't believe it's taken obama this long to infect us, frankly.

zman said...

He brought it over here on his foreign birth certificate.

Greg said...

winter is coming....

Greg said...

Politics aside, our initial reaction to the ebola outbreaks back in August was pretty poor; essentially we told the governments of the afflicted countries in West Africa to "handle it" and threw some resources their way.

rob said...

just saw the first official publication selecting the tribe as the top team in the caa. thornton and prewitt preseason all-league and thornton preseason poy. these expectations carry some weight. i'd much prefer to sneak up on folks.

zman said...

Because W&M has enjoyed oodles of bball success by being sneaky?

Danimal said...

Apparently Kansas hired Charlie Cheeseburger over Gus Malzahn who was ready to take the gig, and Michigan Brady Hoke over Sumlin. Whoopsy.

rob said...

your logic, zman, intrigues me. you must've studied the law.

Marls said...

KC, never say die. Anybody else watching this game?

zman said...

Hi Gheorghies!

T.J. said...

zman, what were u doing up at 4am? was zson torching the neighborhood?

zman said...

zdaughter was angrily teething and pounding a bottle.

Mark said...

To Danimal's point about coaching hire blunders, Purdue also passed over Sumlin (former Purdue LB) for the guy currently running the program into the ground.

Greg said...

And Florida "stole" Muschamp from Texas who now has Charlie Strong.

Mark said...

Thanks for mentioning that Greg.

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Unknown said...

My name is Mr. EHIJATOR ADEBAYO, I am 33 years old and I based in Canada. I want to notify the general public how I was helped by Illuminati temple in regaining back my business position after been sacked for about a year and six months. I have been in pains and trouble since when I was sacked from the company where I work called Canada Deposit Insurance corporation in Ottawa (headquarter) in Canada as an agency executive. I have been hopeless, financially down through out that year. But one day as I was browsing through the Internet I came across the testimony posted by Mrs Thereasa Mathew on how an Illuminati agent MARK ANORLD helped her, saying you can be famous, rich and successful in life by been a member of the great Illuminati Brotherhood, immediately I contacted him and I explained everything to him and he recommended me and he helped me by initiating me to the Great Illuminati Brotherhood and also he gave me all the guidelines and told me their place of worship here in Canada. With the help of Mr. MARK ANORD I was able to go to the temple and there I was initiated fully as a complete Illuminati member. Surprisinly 40 hours after I was initiated, I received a call from the company that I have been accepted back again as the agency executive of the company at first I was shocked and surprised but latter regain myself, I was told to resume work the next day by 7:00am. Starting from that day I and my family had been living a joyful and a luxurious life. So viewers who are interested in becoming a member of the great Illuminati Brotherhood and also wants to be famous, rich, wealthy and gain power should peacefully contact Mr. MARK ANORLD on his email address on (illuminatitempleofriches33@gmail.com) or you can as well call/whatsapp him on +2348139568891.

agent william said...

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illuminati agent said...

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agent william said...

It is a well-known fact that Illuminati consist of Multi Millionaires,
Billionaires who have major influence regarding most global affairs,
including the planning of a New World Order. Many world leaders,
Presidents, Prime Ministers, royalty and senior executives of major Fortune
500 companies are members of Illuminati. join a secret cabal of mysterious
forces and become rich with boundless measures of wealth in your company or
any given business, the great Illuminati can make everything possible just
contact : illuminati666official@gmail.com or WhatsApp +1(863)733-6604 EL
IAI LEXION Thaddeus Iam Vice-President of Citizen Outreach THE ILLUMINATI
ORGANIZATION

Do not hesitate to contact us by WhatsApp.

Whatsapp: +1(863)733-6604
Email : illuminati666official@gmail.com

BEWARE OF SCAMMERS, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS REGISTRATION FEE AND YOU MUST
BE ABOVE THE AGE OF 18YRS.
THANKS.'....//

illuminati agent said...

INTRODUCTION TO ILLUMINATI

or you can ADD US ON WHATSAPP on this

Whatsapp; +1(506)710-0125

,It is a well-known fact that Illuminati consist of Multi Millionaires,Billionaires who have major influence regarding most global affairs, including the planning of a New world order.
Many world leaders, Presidents, prime ministers, royalty and senior executives of major Fortune 5000 companies are members of Illuminati.

Now, for the FIRST TIME IN HISTORY ,we are opening our doors to the masses. If you would like to join illuminati, Just register with us today

ADD US ON WHATSAPP on this

WhtasApp; +1(506)710-0125

OR
E-mail: join666fraternity(at)gmail(dot)com


BENEFITS GIVEN TO NEW MEMBERSWHO JOIN ILLUMINATI.

A Cash Reward of USD $500,000A New Sleek Dream CAR valued at USD$120,000

A Dream House bought in the country of your own choice one Month holiday (fully paid) to your dream tourist destination. One year Golf Membership package a V.I.P treatment in all Airports in the world a total Lifestyle change Access to Bohemian Groove One Month booked Appointment with top 5 world Leaders and Top 5 Celebrities in the World///

agent smith said...

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Chris Manuel said...

HOW I GOT CURED OF HERPES WITH THE HELP OF A GREAT SPELL CASTER DR BEN CALL/WHATSAPP +2348140111921

I am so grateful to the great Dr BEN i for curing my herpes disease,for 4 years ago i was having this infection that made me look so horrible, since i have been having this disease i have been in a complete agony weeping everyday, i have gone to several places trying to get a cure but nothing was change, i had to search for solution in the internet, luckily i came across this testimony of how Dr BEN a cured a lady from this terrible affectio so i decided to contact him through his email voodoospelltemple80@gmail.com i told him exactly how i was feeling and he assure me that he will help me to get cured from my disease, i believed him and obeyed all his instruction that he gave to me, afterwards he prepare a cure for me and when i received it and started using it just as he has promised me, i was cured totally within 2 weeks of usage. contact him at his email: voodoospelltemple80@gmail.com Whatsapp +2348140111921






HOW I GOT CURED OF HERPES WITH THE HELP OF A GREAT SPELL CASTER DR BEN CALL/WHATSAPP +2348140111921

I am so grateful to the great Dr BEN i for curing my herpes disease,for 4 years ago i was having this infection that made me look so horrible, since i have been having this disease i have been in a complete agony weeping everyday, i have gone to several places trying to get a cure but nothing was change, i had to search for solution in the internet, luckily i came across this testimony of how Dr BEN a cured a lady from this terrible affectio so i decided to contact him through his email voodoospelltemple80@gmail.com i told him exactly how i was feeling and he assure me that he will help me to get cured from my disease, i believed him and obeyed all his instruction that he gave to me, afterwards he prepare a cure for me and when i received it and started using it just as he has promised me, i was cured totally within 2 weeks of usage. contact him at his email: voodoospelltemple80@gmail.com Whatsapp +2348140111921

Greg Adolf said...

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seek from us.if you are ready to become a member
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fill in the following as well-:
NAME....................
NEXT OF KIN...................
ADDRESS.................
MARITAL STATUS.............
COUNTRY.........
STATE..................
OCCUPATION................
MOBILE LINE............
A NEW MEMBER WILL GIVEN THE SUM OF
120MILLION DOLLARS, A CAR AND A HOUSE IN ANY
PART OF THE WORLD. NOTE: WE ARE NOT FORCING
ANYBODY FOR THIS. IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED
PLEASE DON'T APPLY



Greg Adolf said...

JOIN THE ILLUMINATI666 BROTHERHOOD?!!!
contact us on +2348035692248 or illumnatib53@gmail.com
Are you a business man, or woman,are you a pastor
or an artist,, do you want to be famous or you want
to be rich or powerful, it is better you become a
member of Illuminati and make your dream come
true . this is the chance for you now to become a
member of the temple KINGDOM and get what you
seek from us.if you are ready to become a member
of Illuminati and realize your dream then-: whatsapp
us or email
illumnatib53@gmail.com
fill in the following as well-:
NAME....................
NEXT OF KIN...................
ADDRESS.................
MARITAL STATUS.............
COUNTRY.........
STATE..................
OCCUPATION................
MOBILE LINE............
A NEW MEMBER WILL GIVEN THE SUM OF
120MILLION DOLLARS, A CAR AND A HOUSE IN ANY
PART OF THE WORLD. NOTE: WE ARE NOT FORCING
ANYBODY FOR THIS. IF YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED
PLEASE DON'T APPLY



Peter bello said...

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Do you want to be a member of Illuminati as a brotherhood that will make you rich and famous in the world and have power to control people in the high place in the worldwide .Are you a business man or woman,artist, political, musician, student, do you want to be rich, famous, powerful in life, join the Illuminati brotherhood cult today and get instant rich sum of. 2 million dollars in a week, and a free home. any where you choose to live in this world and also get 20,000,000 U.S dollars monthly as a salary %2026
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Peter bello said...

WELCOME TO THE GREAT BROTHERHOOD.
Do you want to be a member of Illuminati as a brotherhood that will make you rich and famous in the world and have power to control people in the high place in the worldwide .Are you a business man or woman,artist, political, musician, student, do you want to be rich, famous, powerful in life, join the Illuminati brotherhood cult today and get instant rich sum of. 2 million dollars in a week, and a free home. any where you choose to live in this world and also get 20,000,000 U.S dollars monthly as a salary %2026
BENEFITS GIVEN TO NEW MEMBERS WHO JOIN ILLUMINATI.
1. A Cash Reward of USD $800,000 USD
2. A New Sleek Dream CAR valued at USD $500,000 USD
3.A Dream House bought in the country of your own choice
4. One Month holiday (fully paid) to your dream tourist destination.
5.One year Golf Membership package
6.A V.I.P treatment in all Airports in the World 7.A total Lifestyle change 8.Access to Bohemian Grove
9.Monthly payment of $2500,000,000 USD into your bank account every month as a member
10.One Month booked Appointment with Top 5 world Leaders and Top 5 Celebrities in the World.
If you are interested of joining us in the great brotherhood illuminati satanic hand symbol contact us now with this number or whatsapp me (+2348083325148 }OR Email- Illuminatimoney66@gmail.com

agent smith said...

It is a well-known fact that Illuminati consist of Multi Millionaires,
Billionaires who have major influence regarding most global affairs,
including the planning of a New World Order. Many world leaders,
Presidents, Prime Ministers, royalty and senior executives of major Fortune
500 companies are members of Illuminati. join a secret cabal of mysterious
forces and become rich with boundless measures of wealth in your company or
any given business, the great Illuminati can make everything possible just
contact : join666cult@gmail.com or WhatsApp +1(646)481-0376 EL
IAI LEXION Thaddeus Iam Vice-President of Citizen Outreach THE ILLUMINATI
ORGANIZATION

Do not hesitate to contact us by WhatsApp.

Whatsapp: +1(646)481-0376
Email : join666cult@gmail.com

BEWARE OF SCAMMERS, THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS REGISTRATION FEE AND YOU MUST
BE ABOVE THE AGE OF 18YRS.
THANKS.