But I'm too lazy to come up with much. My beloved Bills will be atrocious this year, as Jerry noted in his Wheelhouse. This woman may be the only person in America who will be this excited to cheer for the Bills this year.
EMBED-Hot Colts Fan Cheers For Wrong Team - Watch more free videos
Update: Glad to see zman throw a post up for kickoff weekend banter. I also had planned to get the world excited for Week 1 of the Inaugural Imaginary League. That's right folks, we haven't even called it fantasy football and you're already bored. But bear with us, briefly, and then jump in the comments to laugh at me for losing by 169 to Zman this week.
In brief, ten of us obviously wanted to waste more time on imaginary football at work, so here's the esteemed lineup of owners (with week 1 matchups):
Leinart Wig Company (TJ)
I couldn't even come up with a funny name. Great start to the season.
homeboys bonanza (zman)
I sense some very tense Monday and Tuesday conversations on "Zman and the Teej" over this league.
Sports! (Dennis)
I hope this is an homage to Huey Lewis.
Mr. Mashed Potatoes (GoldenBoy TNT)
Probably a reference I should get. Or not. Ted likes Philly. Enuff said.
JoeMontanaFishburne (Mark)
A great Week 1 matchup between the two clear winners in "Best Team Name"...
Paging Dr. Faggot (Geoff)
...though this name has to be #1 simply because it made it through the Yahoo filter unscathed.
Bears (Michael Jack Lang)
Worst. Name. Ever.
Shinola (Igor)
WILL HURRICANE IGOR RAVAGE THE LEAGUE WEEK 1!!!!! Jim Cantore will tell us at the half.
The Lumberjacks (Mayhugh)
Hopefully a reference to the classic Monty Python sketch.
The Seaward (WheelhouseJerry)
Not googling this one...don't think it's a Seinfeld reference...it is Jerry, so maybe Arrested Development. Just googled it...I guessed right.
I think we all agreed to chip in 20 bucks for this league. Excitement ensues.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
If it's any consolation, the Bills will be better than my Bucs. I'm expecting 2-14. With that said, I still want to watch so I can monitor the progress of (what I believe) is the NFL's youngest team. Sadly, that won't happen today (or plenty of other Sundays, I'm betting) because their game is blacked out. So, I get to watch Phins-Bills.
ReplyDeleteInaugural Imaginary League update added.
ReplyDeleteI'm getting Carolina-Giants, Bengals-Patriots for the early games. Pretty excited for both those games, for very different reasons. Cinci/NE should be a TD-fest.
ReplyDeleteBlogger picked a great day to shit the bed.
ReplyDeleteAs I tried to comment about 5 times...I took the Giants in my King of the Hill pool this week. I really hope they don't open a new stadium by losing to Matt Moore at home.
ReplyDeleteTJ - TNT's team name is a reference to the "Turn Your Key, Maura" episode of Seinfeld. Because she talks to her food. And I'm pretty sure you were present for this conversation last weekend.
ReplyDeleteAnd my team name is one of the team names in Dodgeball. Yep, couldn't think of anything better under pressure.
Yep. I was. Flashbacks are awesome.
ReplyDeleteAm I gonna get to "hang wit da Teej" today?
ReplyDeleteGreg -- Don't beg. Its not a good look.
ReplyDeleteNice update by the Teej. You know, I had no idea Geoff was a doctor. I did, however, know he was a...oh nevermind.
Gus Johnson doing Bills/Fins. I like.
ReplyDeleteGreg knows how to find me. He just needs to use his decoder ring. That...and actually check his email.
ReplyDeleteHopefully you left some sticks and rocks outside your place, Teej, because Greg doesn't knock.
ReplyDeleteThe panthers linemen have really boring names.
ReplyDeleteRed Zone channel just cut away for a one yd Tebow dive at the 40. What the fuck?
ReplyDeleteCharlie Martin just got concussed.
ReplyDeleteThat Bob Sanders stat says it all:
ReplyDeleteGames Played - 47
Games Missed - 49
Dierdorf already ruining Colts game for me.
ReplyDeleteKevin Boss on his way to the locker room, next play Godfrey gets the pick. Not a great start for Jerry.
ReplyDeleteShot of the Bengals bench - Ray Maualuga's hair is sensational. It almost covers his number.
ReplyDeleteNot liking what I see out of the Giants so far...
ReplyDeleteJay Cutler, pick #1 on the young season. Death, taxes...and Cutler INTs.
ReplyDeleteI would like to know what games our resident gambling fiend Michael Jack laid some dough on...
ReplyDeleteTJ beat me to it. I'm hoping Martz can get Cutler near 30 picks this year...
ReplyDeleteGiants O-line looks like they have no idea how to run-block. Chris Snee was slow on a pull and knocked Bradshaw down. Anything to the outside has been squashed. And then Matt Dodge got way too excited to be punting. Somewhat lucky the D could hold them to a FG after they started from the Giants' 30.
ReplyDeleteJay Cutler - the only individual player I actively root against in the NFL.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteZOLTAN MESKO SIGHTING!!!!
ReplyDeleteI just made the first nonsensical impulse pickup of the inaugural imaginary season.
ReplyDeleteOr...I made a waiver claim. Lame.
ReplyDeleteLemme guess - Vince Young?
ReplyDeleteClose. Nate Washington.
ReplyDeleteBased on fact Red Zone Channel hasn't flipped to Bills/Fins once I take it the game sucks balls?
ReplyDeleteThe Dolphins heard me.
ReplyDeleteThe Bengals need to remember they are a running team, even though they have two whiners playing WR.
ReplyDeleteJust got back from Time Warner in Queens and I'm waiting for my "new" (but extremely dinged-up) cable box to boot. Did I miss any football?
ReplyDeleteUh oh. Tom Brady looks like badass Tom Brady again. Despite that haircut.
ReplyDeleteYou said it TJ. His balls look great. You know what I mean.
ReplyDeleteZ-man, you didn't miss much out of your Bills.
ReplyDeleteWes Welker is a medical marvel.
ReplyDeleteWho has Brady in our league?
ReplyDeleteCable box finished booting and then re-booted. Very bitter.
ReplyDeleteOn my way to Queens I saw a kid in his early 20's rocking a CJ Spiller jersey. Buffalo, not Clemson. I felt bad for him.
ReplyDeleteIGOR!!!! has Brady.
ReplyDeleteHurrican Igor has struck land, folks.
ReplyDeleteI like Scott Hanson being a dick during RZC highlights, pointing out CBS just showed a TD the RZC had 9 minutes earlier.
ReplyDeleteScott Caan and Jinn from Lost star in the new Hawaii 5-0? Where did this come from?
ReplyDelete"This cable box is not authorized for service." Angry.
ReplyDeleteWhic Bucs are worse? Pittsburgh Pirates or Tampa Bay.
ReplyDeleteHas any QB ever been benched for their brother? Because it might happen today.
ReplyDeleteDid Javon Ringer just steal a Chris Johnson TD? Mother f'er.
ReplyDeleteThat's the thing nobody acknowledges about the Bengals. Carson Palmer just isn't that good. And he hasn't been for at least the last 3 years.
ReplyDeleteAnd the Bucs are fucking atrocious. I hope Raheem Morris has a good Realtor. Actually. No I don't. Fuck that guy.
I'm truly excited for the USA-Turkey game.
ReplyDeleteRian Lindell lining up for a 63 yard FG.
ReplyDeleteShort. That would've been good. Gus Johnson was ready to explode.
ReplyDeleteIs Week 1 "Try to blow out you kicker's leg" day?
ReplyDeleteI'm going back to Queens for a new new cable box.
ReplyDeleteWow. The Bucs are turrrrible.
ReplyDeleteBernie "zman" Goez. Falling Down. Laces Out.
ReplyDeleteSomeone's about to break...
Ronder Barber just textd me "LMB and EAD".
ReplyDeleteOB of KB?
ReplyDeleteAwesome TD catch by Mike Williams.
ReplyDeleteI caught a 20 min discussion on espn radio this morning about how the Bengals are the nfl's best team.
ReplyDeleteI'm not getting enough games. But the bright side is I'm seeing more than Z-man.
ReplyDeleteKimo von Oelhoffen may have completely changed Palmer's career trajectory. He hasn't been the same since that injury - he does some thinks good but nothing great and not much even very good.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking of the Redskins game (no one was) I have a hunch its going to be a 9-6 shitfest of a game...something like 3-0 Cowboys at the half. Get excited.
ReplyDeleteSkins love losing close. And ugly.
ReplyDeleteBeast Alert: Hakeem Nicks.
ReplyDeleteMy new fantasy stud - Stephen Gostkowski. Make it happen, Steve-O
ReplyDeleteBoo
ReplyDeleteThe USA-Turkey game is already getting chippy. Crowd is on fire.
ReplyDeleteNBA TV?
ReplyDeleteMarvin Lewis must have given a doozy of a halftime speech.
ReplyDeleteESPN. I feel like I need 5 TVs in my living room right now, two is not sufficient.
ReplyDeleteDennis Dixon showing "moxie" in Pittsburgh.
ReplyDeleteMayhugh was totally right. Giants' O-line is playing horrendously.
ReplyDeleteJags got screwed on that PI call.
ReplyDeleteDid the Giants line just get old all of a sudden?
ReplyDeleteGood to see the Raiders are improved.
ReplyDeleteOh Jay Cutler, you are hilarious.
ReplyDeleteOchoTweeto!
ReplyDeleteThe Browns have a black punter?
ReplyDelete/backing.away.slowly.
Eli and the G-Men need to score a TD here. Please. Fuckers.
ReplyDeleteMartz with play action pass paly from two foot line.
ReplyDeleteFail.
Fans booing lustily.
Mark is torn - Joe haden just got torched on a Tampa TD.
ReplyDeleteThe Bears are also awful.
Hakeem Nicks is collecting TDs. He's also collecting dust on my bench in my $500 fantasy league. Fuckfuckfuck.
ReplyDeleteWhy is Brandon Jacobs so painfully bad in short yardage?
ReplyDeleteHe's channeling Ron Dayne.
ReplyDeleteFalcons and Steelers aren't interested in your stinkin' TDs.
ReplyDeleteArian Foster. Near 200 yards rushing. Well then.
ReplyDeleteOh Tampa bay...
ReplyDeleteThe Bears were down 1 pt halfway thru the 4th...and they went for it on 4th and goal from the 1? Maybe the dumbest thing in the history of football.
ReplyDeleteArian Foster...kicking it on my bench.
ReplyDeleteIt looks like there are A LOT of bad teams. Bears, Detroit, Tampa, Cleveland, Denver, Jax at the least. Something tells me the Panthers are secretly dreadful aside from their running game.
ReplyDeleteFoster has 32 points in our fantasy league. Not to rub it in or anything Geoff, because that's about as much as my whole team.
ReplyDeleteHey Steve Slaton, hope you look forward to free agency Tuesday.
ReplyDeleteIn our league. Not in real life (I don't think).
ReplyDeleteJust got back from Time Warner. They apparently gave me an HD cable box. I don't have an HD tv so the wires don't fit. Fucking livid.
ReplyDeleteWait...you have to go back AGAIN?
ReplyDeleteDenver's kicker has terrible arm tats.
ReplyDeleteJeff Reed, not making friends.
ReplyDeleteWhat the deuce is going on in Houston?
ReplyDeleteCalvin Johnson just fucked all of Chicago, without lube.
ReplyDeleteWow. If this gets overturned...
ReplyDeleteThe Bears are some lucky bastards.
ReplyDeleteI have a picture but no sound. Fucking Bose.
ReplyDeletejags football....catch the so-so'ness
ReplyDeleteI have sound. I better get a beejay for my efforts today. Otherwise no Mad Men or True Blood tonight for the zwoman.
ReplyDeleteCalvin Johnson and Detroit just got royally screwed. You can bring Mike Pereira in to explain how 2 seconds after he caught the ball and fell down the ball hit the ground and came loose. Neat. Ask 50 people to watch that replay and 49 will say TD. The 50th is Teejay, who will say TJ!!!!!!
ReplyDeletejags football...predictable frustration
ReplyDeleteHe palmed the ball post catch. After hitting the ground. How is that not possession?
ReplyDeleteThe Clausen Era gets an early start...
ReplyDeletejags football...don't get too excited yet, they'll likely fuck it up.
ReplyDeleteAnd just checked out ESPN. Way to be, USA.
ReplyDeletehow 'bout them jmu dukes heh guys? heh? ha? how 'bout 'em?
ReplyDeleteJM-who?
ReplyDeleteI like the early nonsense we're seeing in the Rams/Cards cripple fight.
ReplyDeleteDanny boy, you should indeed be whooping it up. I know we did after whipping UVA last year... And we did it in W&M's uniquely dorky way.
ReplyDeleteIgor, go look at Tom Brady's day.
ReplyDeleteglad to see mathis has chosen to go through at least another year without cutting his hair.
ReplyDeletejags win. brohsome.
Hey, Aaron Rodgers, not cool dude.
ReplyDeleteUSA.
ReplyDeletePlaying against Arian Foster and Chris Johnson in money league fantasy. Bumming.
That Calvin Johnson call/rule was horrific.
Sam Elliott has a cool voice. Now doing voice over for both Coors and Dodge. Makes we want to drink and drive.
ReplyDeleteThe Dude abides.
Oh, and my team name is a very lame reference to The Jerk. The movie, not Rob.
ReplyDeletehe's not my michael, he's JERmichael
ReplyDeletelook at you guys with your 124 comments. nice work. way too much effort to read them all, but i'm sure they're awesome.
ReplyDeleteYou should at least read Zman's. Together, they paint a great example of overcoming adversity, and there's some good bitter in there.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteWhy are so many helmets flying off today?
ReplyDeletekevin durant needs to be celebrated in a big way
ReplyDeleteWhitney Kolb = attainably hot.
ReplyDeleteNo beejay yet but the zwoman is cheffing up some mackin' cheese. I like the Eagles' new unis. And there will be no tennis tonight in this weather.
ReplyDeleteYikes - that Weaver injury looked bad. Some CL's may have been torn there.
ReplyDeleteSeahawks are unstoppable. Or something.
ReplyDeleteskins are wearing gold pants tonight, per sportsbog. get excited.
ReplyDeleteI hope Weaver's okay. He's a Satellite Scorpion just like yours truly (I may have mentioned this once before).
ReplyDeleteRashean Mathis' hair is absolutely ridiculous. It covers up most of his number. Even if he was a woman, he'd be overdue for a haircut.
And I really, really love Kevin Durant. Can't wait to see him team up with LeBron, Wade and some of the others from the 2008 team in London in 2012.
At this point, shouldn't we be at least a little suspicious of Donald Driver and PEDs? Dude doesn't age.
ReplyDeleteOne more thing: Its really not a big deal that Arian Foster is "kicking it" on Dr. Faggot's bench as my team has scored a total of 25.7 points today.
ReplyDeletedustin johnson...up 1 over paul casey who is in the clubhouse...going to last hole...can he finally close one out? this story and more in about 14 minutes.
ReplyDeleteryan moore - dapper
ReplyDeleteSomeone recently told me that Alex Smith was going to have huge year. Someone lied pretty bad.
ReplyDeleteSo...the Kevin Kolb era...maybe not gonna be so great, huh?
ReplyDeleteBody Bag Game II: Electric Boogaloo in Philly. Except this time the Eagles are sharing the pain.
ReplyDeleteHey, D-train, thanks for keeping us up on the minor golf tourney results on the 1st Sunday of NFL football. Preesh.
ReplyDeletePete Carroll is still a terrible NFL coach. I saw what he did in NE and NY. I know he has mucho suck still left in him.
ReplyDeleteSeattle up by 22. Glad I don't gamble.
ReplyDeleteJerry, you have unprotected sex with strangers on beaches in other states while little kids ride on motorbikes within dangerous proximity. You gamble.
ReplyDeletefederererer and erin brokovic in 5the set....federrrererer up 5-4
ReplyDeletewill see what other sports i can find
And he orders out.
ReplyDeleteHey...slow down on the unprotected. My record on that front is worthy of the HoF. If there were one for that.
ReplyDeletewould anyone else like to see vick come back and make this a game, thus creating a potential controversy in philly?
ReplyDeleteNo. I would like to see Vick be eaten by a pack of dingos.
ReplyDelete"Maybe the dingos ate you backup QB?"
Michael Vick can still run pretty damn well. Throw and complete passes...not so much.
ReplyDeleteLance Harbor?
ReplyDeleteFlorida State hasn't been the same since Harbor tore up his knee. They'd never of had to turn to Chris Rix if Harbor had made it on campus.
ReplyDeleteun . . . pro . . . tec . . . ted
ReplyDeleteI'd like to see Vick sent to permanent college football as purgatory for his crimes. He'd go to a different "edgy" program in need of a QB each year. Instead of Masoli, Ole Miss takes Vick. Next year he goes to WVU. Then he livens up a program like Washington State. It would be awesome.
ReplyDeletevil...i...i....gant
ReplyDeleteIt sucks that we can only chant in 2+2 syllables.
Told you Rams/Cards had comical scoring potential.
ReplyDeleteI hope Philly sucks this year. I have no particular reason to hate them but I'm fucking tired of them as a team and their fans are annoying as shit.
ReplyDeletehow 'bout this then - is there anyone else here besides me that's really diggin berman's mustache?
ReplyDeleteEveryone should hate them. It's an integral part of the human condition.
ReplyDeleteMine was a reply to you telling me to "slow down" on the unprotected, a Jim Ignatowski nod. As always, I'm a bit too old for you guys.
ReplyDeleteAaron Rodgers can toss the old bean around, that's for sure. I hate to say this but I really like the Eagles helmets. Tastefully simple.
ReplyDeleteIs Larry Fitzgerald gonna have to choke a Derek Anderson?
ReplyDeleteI never, ever get Igor's references, and I didn't spend my childhood trapped in Germany like Greg. It's okay though because Igor always explains them.
ReplyDeleteMatt Hasslebeck and Hakeem Nicks, just hanging out on my bench.
ReplyDelete/fail
There's a fine line between stupid and clever.
ReplyDeletePlease don't make me explain that one.
Fred Jackson's ypc (4.8) was higher than Trent Edwards' ypa (4.1). Both were better than starting RB CJ Spiller's 0.9 ypc. I can't wait for the Jake Locker era to begin.
ReplyDeleteNice throw by Vick down the middle to Celek. Whether Andy Reid wants one or not, he's going to have a QB controversy.
ReplyDeleteSettle down, gramps. I don't want you to break a hip.
ReplyDeleteTD throw. QB controversy is on.
ReplyDeleteControversy status: Budding
ReplyDeleteI wonder if the Vick signing was a shrewed plan to get rid of McNabb and insure against Kolb's suckitude?
ReplyDeleteAndrew Luck >> Jake Locker
ReplyDeleteStupid/clever was intended to depict my references; sorry if it came out more crankpot. That's how everything sounds when you're pushing 40.
ReplyDeleteAt this point, Andy Reid will welcome any controversy that has nothing to do with his progeny.
ReplyDeleteAaron Rodgers, buddy, you're killing me.
ReplyDeleteShhh...... The Arian Foster Nation is born.
ReplyDeletefoster child
ReplyDeleteIf that Calvin Johnson TD/non-TD had happened in the playoffs, it would be talked about all summer and here would be a new "Palm Rule" next fall. Week 1, Detroit... eh.
ReplyDeleteWow. Here come the Iggles.
ReplyDeleteI know all that dog stuff happened, but Vick is still pretty great to watch.
ReplyDeleteYes. Very entertaining. I didn't realize I missed watching Vick play, but I did.
ReplyDeletegreat finish, great call.
ReplyDeleteAS IF!
I hate the Wildcat as a short yardage option for Vick. The wildcat in that situation is most effective with a battering ram (Ronnie Brown, Tebow, etc). It just doesn't work with a elusive 200 lb guy.
ReplyDeleteCome on Sammy B, pull this thing out.
ReplyDeleteMayhugh loves the Redskins.
ReplyDeleteSam Bradford threw 55 passes today. Way to ease the kid in.
ReplyDeleteSkins busting out new home uniforms tonight. Old burgundy jerseys...new gold pants. I like.
ReplyDeleteJerry with a Sammy Baugh reference. I wouldve guessed Igor there.
ReplyDeleteThink Jerry was making a "Bradford a native american" joke, Sparky.
ReplyDeleteI need the Redskins defense to absolutely pummel Romo en route to a single digit point night for Tony Two Tone.
ReplyDeleteIt works on so many levels...
ReplyDeleteMichael Jack looks like he will have highest scoring team of week in the imaginary league. But how did his real gambling go?
ReplyDeleteThe uniforms are classy, just like Tony Dungy. Starting to get nervous for the game.
ReplyDeleteI think the Cowboys will beat the Skins tonight, possibly handily...but all these folks picking Dallas to win the Super Bowl? I just aint seein' it...
ReplyDeleteJust because you're a racist, Geoff...
ReplyDeleteFaith Hill is still bringing the wood.
ReplyDeleteI just want the Skins to look competitive and somewhat organized.
ReplyDeleteFaith Hill looking like the wheels are starting to fall off! Joan Jett cover! Al Michaels' rug! Must be NFL Football on Sunday night.
ReplyDelete