Friday, July 18, 2008

"Two all beef patties, special sauce...

Give me the fucking keys, you fucking cocksucking motherfucker, aaarrrghh.

...lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun!"
MIAMI (AP) - A Miami man who held up a McDonald's at gunpoint in 1994 is now promoting the restaurant's signature sandwich in song. Tamien Bain is among five finalists in the fast food chain's contest for a new jingle promoting the Big Mac.

Bain was arrested on Memorial Day 1994 for the holdup. He served 12 years in prison, where he became interested in making music.

The 29-year-old Bain says he was up front with contest officials about his past when applying for the MySpace.com/BigMacChant competition.

The public has until Sunday to vote. The winner gets a trip to Los Angeles and their song featured in a national McDonald's ad.
I strongly urge all G:TB readers to vote for Mr. Bain.

18 comments:

Mark said...

Nice work TJ. Though, I probably should've posted this since my uncle created the Hamburglar. Rubble, rubble.

TJ said...

Well, my uncle created Ephram the Retarded Rabbit. You might know him better as Bugs Bunny.

Mark said...

He'll always be Ephram the Retarded Rabbit to me.

Greg said...

What about Sarcastic Horse, Flatulent Fox and Dinner Dog?

rob said...

hi everybody! the weather is beautiful. wish you were here. sort of.

TJ said...

Hi rob. EAD and LMB pal.
-Your friends in Christ

Mark said...

I spent some time decoding what TJ said to Rob and, let me tell you, it was NOT nice.

Oh yeah, fuck off you little midget. I hope they packed an extra children's life vest for you. Sort of.

TJ said...

Joakim Soria's new nickname is "The Mexicutioner"? That's fucking awesome.

Mark said...

That is pretty damn solid.

Mark said...

So Im watching the Knicks/Suns summer league game and Mike D'Antoni is sitting with the announcing crew. He mentions that he and Eddie Curry willbe having dinner tomorrow night and then says, "But we're only having salads."

There you go Mike, make fun of the fat kid.

TJ said...

I'm not sure letting Curry put down three pieces of lettuce and then having him blitzkrieg the Ponderosa buffet line truly counts as a salad. Eddy, the Banana Cream Pie is not a topper.

Mark said...

I've heard the Knicks announcers mention at least 4 guys who have clearly lost weight so far this summer (Q, Mardy Collins, Wilson Chandler, somebody else). My question is this? What the fuck was going on last year? Was Isiah serving onion rings and cheesesteaks after every practice?

The general lack of self motivation amongst NBA players is horrifying.

TJ said...

Once again I have to ask - what the fuck was D'antoni thinking?

Mark said...

That he really, really likes money...at least that would be my guess.

TJ said...

So I haven't seen a second of todays final round of the British, but let me guess, the Shark's no longer the leader?

TJ said...

Jason Taylor's a Redskin now?

rob said...

indeed. nice to see little danny starfucker's still got it.

Rhymenocerous said...

On the lardass members of the Knicks, Isiah pretty much stopped having the team practice for the second half of the year. He would rely on pre-game shoot-arounds that were less than 30 minutes to "prepare" for their opponent.

Marbury always kept in shape with his TRUCK FUCK work-outs in Mt. Vernon. Not sure if the others followed his lead.