Friday, July 25, 2008

Taking you into the weekend...Florida style.

Ever since I met TJ and he figured out that we worked in similar capacities at similar organizations, we've spent far too much time emailing ridiculous stories to one another throughout our respective workdays. I do not believe I am alone here. I imagine TJ's typical workday consists of him looking up various "news articles" on the ebays and sending them off to any number of friends and former colleagues. Followed by him trolling youtube for approximately 4 hours, a long lunch (which may or may not include three beers) and finally, about fifteen minutes of real, actual work. So basically, TJ is like everybody else who works in the District of Columbia.

Anyway, TJ's favorite thing to email me are the many wildly ridiculous and unbelievable stories that are produced by the population of my home state, Florida. Now, I'm fully aware that Florida is a disgusting cess pool of rednecks, immigrants, retirees, inbreds, annoying transplant northerners and people so dumb that they should have their genitalia removed via a blowtorch. I'm also well aware of what a joke Florida has become nationally because of its inhabitants. That's why I live two blocks from the beach and never, ever venture more than 20 miles inland unless I'm visiting Gainesville or Orlando (I even try to limit my Orlando trips now...It's like LA sans the whimsy...and if you replace the Mexicans with Puerto Ricans).

With all this said, TJ's decided that I should start posting some of these stories of Sunshine State absurdity semi-regularly here at G:TB. So, consider this post and it's various links the introduction to this new and, surely, short lived G:TB feature.

10 comments:

TJ said...

America's Wang produces one absurd story a day. Minimum.

Zoltan said...

Either John Updike or Tom Wolfe referred to Florida as America's unwiped bung.

Mark said...

Nobody likes that picture of Erin Andrews? That alone should make up for half of the bullshit Florida is responsible for.

TJ said...

Joba!

Greg said...

People don't believe me when I tell them that my high school, in addition to the normal-sized diploma, also gave out a wallet-sized diploma. Something to carry around with you, just in case your high school graduate status is ever in question.

Mark said...

Satellite did that too. I had completely forgotten about that.

TJ said...

Just spent a good chunk of my day playing Wii Sports. That shit is fantastic.

Mark said...

What's worse than excruciatingly long delays for replay reviews during an NFL game? Similarly lengthy delays during an Arena game.

Mark said...

The Wii is a fantastic invention.

My gf's daughter played at a friends house and then came home and asked us if she could have one for her birthday. Easiest decision ever.

rob said...

i don't know which would make for a better gtb post, teejay all hopped up on goofballs playing wii games or mark's arena bowl live blog. perhaps it's a symptom of my own personal dementia, but i'd read either one.