I was halfway through a jelly-filled when she walked into my office. Legs all the way to here, hair as black as Dean Keener's mood, and eyes colder than Eric Maynor's blood. It was the Pocohontas costume that really got me, though – me and Gabriel Byrne, suckers for cartoon babes.“I don’t know where else to turn”, she whispered, her sweet-warm breath dissipating the bluish haze for the briefest of moments. (I don’t smoke, but I don’t dust much, either). “I took something from the Big Blue Beast, and he wants it back.”
(Dramatic music swells. A lightning crash is visible through the slits in the window blinds. An announcer’s voice is heard.)Will our hero save the day?
Will the Big Blue Beast get revenge?
Will Litos continue to do his part?
Is it weird that I find cartoon women alluring?
Tune in tomorrow night in Williamsburg for all the answers.
Posts
swint's last comment in the post below gives me a brilliantly awful idea. how 'bout we all take the 'stimulus' checks we're getting from the government this summer and pool them to create a gambling syndicate?
ReplyDeleteRob, I thought you could use a pic of Nathan "You Da" Mann for this post.
ReplyDeleteah, i like that better.
ReplyDeleteI'm in. although who is this swint guy that you're talking about?
ReplyDeleteright. sorry, quint.
ReplyDeleteThis shark, swallow you whole.
ReplyDeleteMan goes in the cage.
ReplyDeleteCage goes in the water.
Shark's in the water.
Our shark.
farewell and adieu to you fair spanish ladies/farewell and adieu, you ladies of spain.
ReplyDeleteYou have city hands, Mr. Hooper. You been countin' money all your life.
ReplyDeleteHubie, just once in your life, call "the painted area" the oaint.
ReplyDeleteAnd Mike Tirico likes the bad touch.
that'd be original, at least
ReplyDeleteIndeed. Spelling things correctly would help.
ReplyDeleteGonzaga at Memphis, noon, ESPN. Get excited.