Thursday, February 04, 2010

World's Fastest Frozen Wren: Foiled From Worldwide Festivities?

Bobsled, or bobsleigh as the cognocenti call it, became an Olympic event in 1924. Unsurprisingly, the event involves a sled. In the sled are two or four people who hurl said sled down a frozen chute. The sledders need explosive strength and speed to get the sled off to a swift start.

That's all I know about bobsledding. I have no idea if the sledders steer the sled, let alone how they do so. I don't know how to tell if the sledders are sledding swifter or slower than they should be, if they're screwing up, or if they're doing an especially superior job on any particular run.

But I still watch the event, even though I don't know the nuances, because the goal is simple: go faster than everyone else. There are no judges, no referees, no objective points for artistic merit, no vote swapping collusion. Just speedy sleds. And fans with cowbells. It's a pants-splittingly splendid event.



I bet Brian May loves that clip.

If that isn't enough to convince you, then how about this: the US women's team includes a former Wren. Her name is Ingrid Marcum, class of 1997, and I remember seeing her around the delis and possibly Unit M. She was featured in the most recent the alumni magazine, which says she was a member of the gymnastics team and a marketing major. She's also the 2009 US National Champion weightlifter in the 75 kilo class. This might make her the most accomplished Tribe athlete from my tenure in the Burg, aside from Darren Sharper.

So here's an excuse to watch TV instead of working on your honey-do list: root for the US women's bobsled team and in turn support the Tribe.

Or so I thought. Shortly after I wrote this breezy missive, I realized that the alumni magazine described Marcum as a team hopeful and not a team member, so I decided to double-check my facts. The US bobsled federation has a women's team and an Olympic team. It appears that Marcum is not on the Olympic team. I'm sure that she is, however, rooting for the US team. As you should too.

Need another reason to watch bobsledding? How 'bout this: Gheorghe Muresan will. Romania has won 1 (one!) medal in Winter Olympics history, despite missing only the 1924 and 1960 Olympics. That medal was a bronze in ... that's right, 2-man bobsled. It stands to reason then that Romania's best shot to medal in Vancouver is in bobsled, so Gh-Unit will be watching. Join him.

34 comments:

TJ said...

Snowpocalypse '10 headed to DC...

cgormley said...

USA. USA.

So is this a bad Valentine's Day gift for the wife?
http://tinyurl.com/yl3lrcs

Dan said...

zoltanimal...in reference to your winchester/hairy armpits comment earlier - eeeassy big guy on the chester! there's a lot of sweet action that comes out of that town. (hello? patsy cline!) trust me - have been rejected there by many and often.

zoltan said...

I've never ventured to Winchester, I was just making fun of Dave's sentence structure. I'm sure that the ladies in Winchester are delightful to behold and that they are naturally hairless in places where one would like them to be. Just like all the other ladies in Virginia.

Dave said...

it's difficult to use "heckuva" in a coherent sentence.

heckuva good bobsleigh preview. you've continued my slant of reporting more on people who aren't on the team than the folks that are . . .

mayhugh said...

Ok, so there's a potentially vicious rumor going around that the local weather people are withholding the real total expected snow accumulations to avoid mass hysteria, and that actual totals could approach 50". Not buying this yet.

rob said...

but wouldn't that cause people to rise up en masse and drive the weatherfolk from their homes for not warning us? via snowplow, snowshoe, and toboggan, of course.

TJ said...

If that is true, well, I hope to god Snake Plissken knows how to get to Shirlington...

mayhugh said...

Or Dennis Quaid and Jake Gyllenhaal.

I can't think of a legitimate reason for withholding this information if it were in fact true. Aside from local outrage at weather people that are by default perceived as typically inaccurate, it just seems too irresponsible for any recognized organization to not provide this information.

rob said...

i'm quite sure rahm emanuel has something to do with this.

Mark said...

It's going to be in the 80s and sunny here tomorrow. Just thought you guys like to know.

rob said...

try not to get run over by a senior citizen

Mark said...

Are you kidding me? Those old bastards better hope I don't run a whole pack of them over. (I'm looking at you Red Hat Ladies)

rob said...

awl

zoltan said...

Tell your local government to invest in snowplows and rock salt. Buy a Subaru maybe. Grow a pair of testacles. Then you'll be fine.

TR said...

What are testacles?

rob said...

trial spectacles - used for deciding whether or not you look cool in glasses.

zoltan said...

They're a type of testicle found in the scrota of idiots who can't spell.

TJ said...

Spectacle
Testicles
Wallet
Watch

mayhugh said...

I don't foresee a scenario where I would be purchasing a Subaru by tomorrow morning.

TJ said...

Note to Gov of Va: I don't think you're allowed to declare a state of emergency BEFORE said emergency even remotely occurs.

That is all.

rob said...

my kids' schools are already closed for tomorrow

TJ said...

Snowgasm.

Shlara said...

TJ--you, Mrs. The Teej, me and my sister should trek up to Cap City and toast the Snowpocalypse this weekend.

It's nice to be within walking distance of a bar in a snowstorm, isn't it?

TJ said...

Hoth Happy Hour?

Mark said...

Damn you all. I want a snow day. Or, in my case, a Hurricane day. I didn't get a single one in 2009 and I feel cheated dammit.

TJ said...

You know who's pretty damn good at hoops again?

UNLV.

Mark said...

Lon Kruger's unibrow is powerful and wise.

rob said...

bama/florida is funnnnn

rob said...

i expect chandler parsons to do something crazy here

rob said...

wow, nobody can stay in front of walker

Mark said...

Walker is awesome. I couldn't love his game or his gigantic brass balls more, no homo.

Mark said...

Is there anybody alive who looks more like a bird than Trent Johnson?

Michael said...

how come that I can't be invited to Cap City? I live within walking distance. Is Shlara too good for me? wait, no need to answer that.