The Sequel Sucks Nearly as Much as the Original

Assistant U.S. Attorneys Daniel Butler and Steven Durham likely have little appreciation for irony this evening. In fact, it's fairly likely they're more than five fingers deep into a bottle of something strong after their gaffe in the perjury trial of Roger Clemens. Most reading this post already know that Judge Reggie Walton angrily declared a mistrial today after the prosecution violated his pre-trial instructions and allowed the jury to indirectly hear testimony from Andy Pettitte's wife, Laura. We don't spend much time in courtrooms, not since that unfortunate skinny-dipping/goat-tipping incident, but we suspect it's rare that a Federal judge denigrates an AUSA by calling his conduct less competent than that of a first-year law school student.

Were Butler and Durham in the mood to wax philosophical, though, they might draw some small amusement from the symmetry between today's result and that of Game 4 of the 1990 ALCS. Clemens had a lot on the line that October day, as well. He took the mound with the Red Sox trailing the Oakland A's, three games to none. He'd pitched effectively in Game 1, tossing six scoreless frames before the Sox' bullpen imploded, giving up nine runs in the final three innings. And just as the U.S. had a solid opening day in Judge Walton's courtroom, Clemens set the A's down in the bottom of the first inning of the fourth game, erasing a leadoff single by Rickey Henderson with a double play and retiring Jose Canseco on a meek grounder to second.

In both events, though, the second act proved pivotal. Clemens got Harold Baines to pop to third to lead off the second inning, but Carney Lansford and Terry Steinbach both singled, with Steinbach heading to second on a error by Mike Greenwell. The tightly-wound Clemens visibly chafed at the Greenwell error, but seemed to avoid real damage when Mark McGwire grounded to short, scoring Lansford. Willie Randolph worked a walk on five pitches (and in the movie, this is where the director employs a split screen showing the Government screening Clemens' Congressional testimony), bringing light-hitting Mike Gallego to the plate.

As an agitated Clemens received the ball from catcher Tony Pena, he began yelling at plate umpire Terry Cooney (playing the role of Reggie Walton in this bizarre shadow performance). Several of Crash Davis' magic words followed, leaving Cooney/Walton no choice but to eject Clemens/declare a mistrial. Gallego doubled off relief pitcher Tom Bolton, giving the A's a lead they wouldn't relinquish, as they swept the Sox for the second time in three ALCS matchups.

Durham and Butler certainly wouldn't appreciate this observation, either. At the time, Sox fans like me figured Clemens a bit gutless, folding under the pressure. In hindsight, it's possible that certain other factors might have caused the Texas Con Man to exhibit irrational, uncontrollable rage.

If only he'd lied about it to Congress.