Friday, September 04, 2009

The Bear: I Will Lick All Your Stuff


This is my friend Igor's favorite Greasetruck song. He's a huge music fan and he likes cool bands like Wilco and Sunvolt and Uncle Tupelo, so that counts for something. He also really like Ween and Adam Ant, so maybe it doesn't count for all that much.

The song, which I call The Bear, is my take on the current economic meltdown. If you listen carefully, you can hear my banjo run through an amp simulator.

The Bear

When I come, I will not come alone
I will come like a pack of flying monkeys.
I will come like the hun,
Like a bullet from a gun,
make you run down your street,
clinging to the things you think you need.

I will come into your kitchen,
seize your breakfast, key your Lexus,
chase you all the way to Texas
just kick you in your solar plexus.

You will believe in me.

Like a disease,
Like a horde of killer bees.
Like a pox of rabid fleas,
you will know it's me--
When your trees are full of monkeys,
dirty nasty smelly monkeys.
I will scratch your DVDs,
ruin their alphabetical order.
Make love to you daughter
on your flat screen TV.

Steal you wife, steal your life,
play with all the blades on your swiss army knife.
Drink you high end tequila,
autograph your sports memorabilia.
Treat you rough, treat you tough,
I will lick all your stuff.

You will believe in me.

7 comments:

Dave said...

sorry about deleting, i wanted to put the small mp3 player code in.

T.J. said...

No worries maestro...

Dave said...

i love being called "the maestro." i think i'll make my wife and kids start calling me that.

rob said...

music month, dave. music month. if you'd stop falling asleep at the staff meetings we wouldn't have to keep telling you stuff multiple times.

T.J. said...

He's too busy daydreaming about his time in Tuscany as "the maestro"...

rob said...

my secret 'draft jeremiah masoli' strategy for our college league took a bit of a dent last night, no?

Dave said...

music month? shit! i spent twenty minutes this morning trying to figure out how to get that mp3 player widget working because i wanted to get something in before the deadline.

so the longest "random idiots" song to date will premier during "music month."