Friday, May 16, 2014

London 0 Hull 4

Much of the press coverage surrounding tomorrow's FA Cup Final between Arsenal and Hull City focuses on the London club's nine-year trophy drought. And while it's notable that one of English soccer's heavyweight's hasn't scratched in nearly a decade, it's their opponents' story that we find more compelling.

Fourteen years ago, Hull City was locked out of its home grounds as a result of fiscal mismanagement and missed rent payments. Only ten years ago, the club competed in England's Third Division, only one rung up from what is essentially semi-pro soccer. (The English system, in all its Byzantine glory, is explained in detail here.)  The Tigers slowly found financial stability, and earned promotions in 2005 and 2008 before being relegated to the Championship, then clinched their return to the Premiership last year. Despite being an early favorite for relegation, Hull City managed to stay up, finishing 16th, three points clear of the dead zone.

"I haven't heard of me, either"
Tomorrow's match at Wembley marks Hull City's first-ever appearance in the FA Cup final. Meanwhile, Arsene Wenger's Gunners have won 10 Cups, and taken three doubles (winning the Premier League title and FA Cup in the same year). Arsenal boasts household football names like Mertesacker, Koscielny, Ozil, Podolski, Wilshere, Giroud, and Arteta. Hull, well, Hull have a nice group of lads. Maybe you've heard of Tom Huddlestone, or Curtis Davies? No? That's okay, neither has anyone else.

Win or lose tomorrow, the Tigers have already clinched a berth in Europe next season, grabbing a spot in the Europa League by virtue of Arsenal's entry in the Champions League. From a geographical and probabilistic perspective, this would be roughly akin to the Portland Sea Dogs earning a berth in the American League. (Roughly akin, as there really isn't any American equivalent to the extra-league play that's such a vital part of European soccer.)

In the Tigers' honor, and because one can never have enough Housemartins, a song that describes (at least in the title) Hull fans' barely contained anticipation of tomorrow's 5:00 GMT kickoff.



46 comments:

Clarence said...

Hoo boy, that video. I dig the Housemartins, but that is . . . twee.

rob said...

pretty sure they own the licensing rights to twee.

Danimal said...

Jags Rookie Camp starts today. Still not too late to get on board people. Anyone?
Blake....and Shake! Yeah, that's right!
Bortles' Mortals!
Blakes' Bitches!

Clarence said...

Bortles' Mortals?

English 434: Advanced Mediocre Rhyming
And people in Winchester said that JMU education would never come in handy.

Danimal said...

Bortle Combat!

zman said...

Immortals would be tougher. We're all mortals after all. Rhyme issues notwithstanding.

zman said...

If they get Eddggerrinn they could be Bortles and James.

rob said...

blake's babies

Mark said...

Random tattoo bullshit:

Getting the inside of your upper arm done still blows.

During the course of my tattoo, the conversation ended up veering towards Williamsburg, VA. And then eventually W&M. My tattoo artist's last name is Wren. Yep, the Wren building at W&M is named after one of his great (many times over) grandfather.

Danimal said...

Time to stock up the kindle....Mark, what was the name of the hoops book you mentioned in the last week or so? Any other recs? Anyone?

Mark said...

It's Breaks of the Game. Great book and it certainly doesn't hurt that it's written by David Halberstram. It's from the 70s though so it might not resonate with you depending on your level of basketball love.

More recent basketball books aid recommend: The Dream Team, The Last Great Game, The Last Shot (not that recent...20 years ago but great), Pistol, Play Their Hearts Out.

Also, if you haven't read Boys Will Be Boys (about the 90s Cowboys), I highly recommend that.

rob said...

read matterhorn, danimal. and everyone else.

Mark said...

A local talk show host who's a bit of an Orlando legend (this, for once, is a compliment) read Matterhorn when it first came out and raved about it. Thanks for the reminder.

TR said...

Dave - read Doctor Dealer and Killing Pablo. Both are Marc Bowden books.

zman said...

No one reads fiction?

Danimal said...

Thanks guys, you too TJ.

rob said...

matterhorn is fiction, z

rob said...

tribe and charleston played the longest baseball game in ncaa history yesterday. c of c won, 3-2, in 23 innings. tribe still leads the league by 1/2 game.

Mark said...

Fuck fiction.

zman said...

Robert Mathis took Clomid because his wife couldn't conceive? Because he had low sperm count due to low testosterone? Even thought he's 250 pounds of solid muscle? Sounds fishy.

rob said...

fik-shun, though

rob said...

serge ibaka out for the playoffs. dagger for the thunder.

Shlara said...

I finally watched the Bad Boys 30 for 30--you don't realize how tame the NBA has become until you see that game footage from the 80s.

And I love Rick Mahorn--he went to college with one of my former colleagues, so he was around a lot during the offseason. He's such a cool dude. He would play in some office pickup games--and still set those picks on regular dudes--it's like hitting a wall.

Mark said...

Well, hello there Hull City.

Mark said...

This game tho...

rob said...

arsenal's quality seems to be wearing hull down

rob said...

just a phenomenal third goal for the gunners

mayhugh said...

For the fight fan(s), tonight's boxing throwdown is promising. Juan Manuel Marquez, the Mexican fighter who has fought over 60 professional fights (including a crushing knockout of Manny in their third meeting), takes on Mike Alvarado tonight on HBO. Alvarado was the first fighter to beat Brandon Rios (Manny was the second), avenging a knockout loss a few months earlier. Alvarado suffered boxing's equivalent of a a pantsing at the hands (fists?) of Ruslan Provodnikov, who is basically a smaller version of Sergei Kovalev, only with a slightly meaner streak and less English vocabulary.

Neither of these guys is afraid to throw punches, whether on the inside or from distance, and each has tasted the canvas multiple times in their careers. Further, each of them is coming off of a big loss (Marquez lost to Timothy Bradley, Alvarado quit on his stool before the 8th round to Provodnikov, and I don't blame him). Both of these guys tend to start slow (relatively), but I think this one will be exciting and high action from the first bell and I'll be surprised if it gets to the late rounds. I'll take Marquez, who somehow seems to be getting better in his 40's - I'm calling a KO by Marquez in the 6th round.

Mark said...

I'm excited too, Mayhugh. It's such a bonus when I don't have to pay for good boxing. And I'm pretty sure the somehow with Marquez is spelled PED.

rob said...

mayhugh, you should turn that knowledge into a guestie or two. lord knows we need the content.

mayhugh said...

Yep, he's gotten ripped in the past year or two especially. Added bonus that wife is taking her grandmother to Folger's theatre so I can actually watch it live and not at 1AM.

mayhugh said...

And Rob - would be happy to contribute whenever. The next one I will probably get worked up about is Rigondeaux, who is fighting an as yet unchosen opponent in July.

Mark said...

Marquez was stupid ripped for the Pacquiao fight. Im pretty sure that's not all from drinking his own piss.

zman said...

I drink pregnant horse piss to get ripped.

Mark said...

Well, duh. I'm more of a Cambodian breast milk guy myself.

Went out for dinner tonight at a local bar/restaurant. We're friends with the bartender. She offered me a free shot of Patron (because she wanted to start drinking) after dinner. I turned it down. I also taught my two year old to say "turn down for what" tonight. Father of the Year.

rob said...

now i think you're just making up names, mayhugh. but write that shit up and we'll post it anyway.

Mark said...

At this point Rob will post anything somebody writes for G:TB. So thirsty.

rob said...

ain't that the truth

rob said...

found a variety pack of 4 22 oz. stone beers for $15.99 at costco today. arrogant bastard, stone ipa, imperial stout, and sublimely self-righteous black ipa. the cheapest of the 4 retails for $4.99 in my local market, so that's a bargain, and they're kickass brews. happy time.

TR said...

I have two things to say here:

1) Anybody who hasn't watched the "Turn a Down For What" video must do so. Immediately. Without your kids nearby.

2) Donny D got his swerve back on last week in Mad Men (just watched it).

3) Jameson's 12 year special reserve is fantastic. I highly recommend it if you have the means.

4) Whiskey

rob said...

holy shit. i can't reiterate tr's advice regarding the 'turn down for what' video more strongly. that's as good as anything i've seen in that medium in a cow's age.

zman said...

I swear to god that Matthew Weiner gets all of Betty Draper Francis's dialog from interviews with my ex-wife.

rob said...

is this a good time to mention that i've never seen mad men?

Mark said...

Rob...you're the worst. Just ask Greg.

rob said...

i always liked greg, too.

zman said...

Hi Gheorghies! rob, if you have a TV you should watch Mad Men. Trust me. I'm smart. I speak Italian!