Thursday, October 28, 2010

Name That Tune

I recently returned from a highly productive three day jaunt to Boston during which I got more stories than JD's got Salingers.

1. I got a haircut from my old barber Baldino who was recently named runner-up for best barber in Boston, which is bullschtein because he's still #1. You're a donkey if you let anyone else in Boston cut your hair. Now like the Knicks I got game like I work at Hasbro.

2. I got my "Biz's Baddest Beats" CD back from my buddy J-P, who borrowed it some time around 2003 and who returned it on Tuesday with nary a scratch. Now I got more [of Biz's] hits than Sadahara Oh.

3. I got a gurgling cod. I can put juice in it, and I got more juice than Picasso got paint.

4. I got a King of Kenmore and some beers including Samuel Smith's India Ale and a really good porter the name of which I cannot remember, at The Lower Depths. With that porter, I got more flavor than Fruit Striped Gum.

5. I got a good music tip from Chris, the kickass bartender at The Lower Depths, because he put "Exploding Head" by A Place to Bury Strangers on, and I said how much I like them, and he said he was embarassed to admit that he just heard about them, and I said that that made no sense as they were totally up his alley, and he agreed and then suggested I check out Film School, claiming that they are very similar acts.



I think the comparison is pretty good musically ...



... and when it isn't close musically it's close graphically ...



In any event, with the addition of Film School to my iPod I can now say that I got more rhymes than Jamaica got mangoes. I counted. Really, I did.

6. I got home and the zwoman just finished doing the laundry and was folding her tits off, so now I have clean clothes. You could even say that I got more suits than Jacoby and Meyers. Or, for bonus points, that I got more styles than all the Jamaicans in Brooklyn.

10 comments:

Igor said...

Zman is very Mike D. Best lyrical references in the bunch, and just a touch of pencil-necked smarm. Plus, his last name became an accompanying initial.

As for me, I got mad hits like I was Rod Carew.

T.J. said...

Well, I ain't no soft sucker with a parrot on his shoulder cause I'm bad gettin' bolder - cold getting colder.

Mark said...

I always enjoy the stylings of the Zman. But that's because I'm sweeter than a cherry pie with Redi-Whip topping, ngs.

T.J. said...

You might not see Danimal 'round these parts today, because I reached in his pocket, took all his cash and left my man standing with an egg mustache.

rob said...

with his bad breath onion riiiiings

zman said...

I got more Adidas sneakers than a plumber's got pliers. Seriously, I have at least 6 pairs of Adidas.

And it seems like no one wants to name any of those tunes.

Dave said...

"folding her tits off"?

waxin' and milkin' all of your square heads.

Igor said...

Zman, this is a game better suited for a bar than a bunch of guys at their desks with internet access. Remember, it's not how you play the game, it's how you win it. I cheat and steal and sin, and I'm a cynic.

Seems like several of them are Shadrach material. Whatever it is, makes me want to pull out Paul's Boutique-a (and we're in Brooklyn) and give it a spin.

Hard to believe it was 21 years ago that Rob, Dave, and I were first boogie-ing down to that album in Williamsburg. Lord.

Mark said...

To be honest, I didn't eve read the post's title but, yeah, that's Shadrach.

zman said...

I know what you mean. I mix business with pleasure way too much. Ask for Janice.

The "I gots" all come from different songs with a non-Beasties bonus.