FOG:TB Robbie Hummel is out for the season after injuring his ACL in the second drill of the season. The NCAA is in the process of deciding whether to grant him a 13th year of eligibility.
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Dedicated to the premise that life would be better if we all took ourselves a little less seriously.
214 comments:
1 – 200 of 214 Newer› Newest»I live next door to an old guy from Chicago. He got on the elevator this morning with a soggy cigar clenched in his teeth and said "Did you see that game last night? I hate the Yankees. But when I saw George Bush on TV I had to root for them. The Rangers should ban that stupid sonofabitch from games, otherwise the entire nation will turn against them!"
Hummel got pummeled.
Yeah, he's positively flummoxed!
Wait? That doesn't rhyme? I should go fuck myself?
Tough crowd here.
i often hear commentators talk about christian ponder's talent, but i don't think i've ever seen him play well
Yes. Very Dave. Tho in his defense that I N T was a tipped pass.
Dave? was supposed to say "average"
Got me one of those new smaaht phones which ain't too smaaht
Ok
He sucks
who, dave?
No. Dave's on 2nd.
Nice slate of 3:30 games we've got ahead of us here.
What's that? Am I nervous about Mississippi State tonight? Why yes. Yes I am.
/jams self
Oh, and I've been to Auburn recently for a game. Let me assure you, those redneck motherfuckers LOVE Zombie Nation. 30 times a game, minimum.
Texas...I like what you're doing here.
Gary Danielson just commended Bobby Petrino for being able to think to or three plays ahead? Isn't that like applauding a dentist for being able to open a patient's mouth?
Wait a minute, Bobby Humphrey's kid plays for Auburn? Fuck me. I am old as fuck.
Cam Newton. Manbeast.
Danimal's phone thinks "very avergae" equals "Dave"? That phone has quite a sense of humor.
Elvis Andrus is a pesky little fuck.
Two TVs is not even close to sufficient right now.
nice to see the rangers down early
CBS fell asleep at the switch - Ryan Mallett went into the locker room right under their nose.
Greg Childs is a manbeast.
Why does Jeff Tedford still have a job? I want Mike Leach on the Cal campus.
Robinson Cano is locked in...jesus.
Does Arkansas employ a full time engraver for all those student names? Seems to be a waste of resources.
Auburn is incapable of playing a football game that isnt wildly entertaining.
Oh goodie - time for the Rangers bullpen.
texas' crowd is dead-solid convinced they're going to blow this.
Seriously, this game is awesome. Who needs defense.
I'm speaking about Auburn-ARK. I'm definitely NOT watching baseball.
Defense isn't even optional in this game. Michigan-Iowa has suddenly gotten interesting as well.
Are both teams going to go for 50? I feel like that's a legitimate possibility. Bananas.
Actually. It's nearly a lock that both teams will go for 50+. Will someone break 60?
You know what's only slightly better than the defense in this game? The officiating.
I'm not sure, but I think Arkansas got fucked twice on replays and it cost them 2 turnovers and 14 points.
just gettin back in the mix...love the skinit.com commercials, or commercial rather
i don't know who's who in the lsu mcneese state game.
the o/u on pryor INT's tonight (and i don't know if he's thrown any yet)...i'm going w/3.
parents went to "mass" 3 hours ago...mark - are they w/you
I agree, Dan. The blonde is hot, and slutty.
And yes, your folks are here. Dad and I just knocked back a couple lines.
pat forde is such the twitter whore. can someone stop him? please.
parents just rolled in....they're bouncin.
Erin just said "pounding it in" hee hee
click clack's about to lose to kentucky
Wow. Had the wrong game on. Could b a great finish
South Carolina...nice to see you again.
Al Toon's kid is named Nick Toon. I find this very, very amusing.
Florida is terrible. This is not debatable.
Osu toast
2 minutes to play. Florida down 3 with the ball on their own 4 yard line. Kicker out. Season on the line. Confidence level: Subterranean.
Fuck me. Florida sucks.
florida loss + osu loss + nd win = declan gets a christmas this year. thank the lord baby jesus. mark - i feel your pain. have felt it since 1993 actually.
My pain is expressed through copious amounts of liquor. FUUUUUUUUUCK.
bodhi's about to surf the 50-year storm, if that's any consolation
It is. What channel?
i am an fbi agent but can't find the channel.
I've informed my friend Vitas that I blame his recent marriage for the downfall of Florida football.
wilson's beard is definitely colored no? is that real?
how bout that catcher's helmet? it's sceery.
what else you guys wanna talk about?
How about we talk about this Brad Lidge character? Pretty shaky, eh?
bodhi really does a shitty job surfing that wave. at least carve a little bit before taking the dive.
Raul Ibanez, ya gotta swing buddy...
Anybody want to take a trip down to Florida and stab me in the eye?
*purchases eticket*
Jake Locker looking good right there.
I expect a pick six on his next possession.
i love me some kiss commercials
rob - thanks for the answering the channel question. preesh. no, i can't look for it. just tell me the FUCKING CHANNEL!!!!!
be back in a second
rob - how's that calf muscle? you gonna make that 1/2 marathon...which is when?
Danimal...was supposed to head to Jax for the Cocktail Party. Not looking like that's gonna happen now. However, I will be up there for Jags-Texans in early November. Holler at your boy...
Washington-Oregon state is going to cause me to stay up way to late and drink way too much.
Florida is fucking horrible.
Mike Vrabel, TD catch.
And Nate Burleson quiets New Meadowlands early...
Are they going to make a sequel to Blindside where Michael Oher holds every time on the outside rush and can't remember the snap count? I don't think that was appropriately covered in the first installment.
And 10 seconds after post type that, another false start...
Too bad Jay Cutler is back, I miss seeing Todd Collins' miserable stat lines.
had to listen to the giants on the radio today-- some cable stand-off and my aerial wasn't doing the trick.
Serioulsy, Minnesoata, do me the favor that Detroit and Atlanta couldn't today - one NFC team has to drop aside from the Skins (probably).
That INT helps. Why can't Dallas help themselves with the passing? They've converted every third and one with a running play and then decide to throw it...
Albert Haynesworth: Inactive - Coach's Decision.
jay glazer's tweet machine said that was going to happen - related to his brother's death
carlos rogers' hands write their own jokes at this point
and then drop them
Oh right. I think that's excusable. Also inactive is Rocky McIntosh, so we get more of H.B. Blades, whom I really enjoy.
Rogers' hands are a liability, at least on this play.
If they rule this a catch for Rogers, he becomes the biggest asshole in history. He can't catch when it matters, he does catch when he can fuck his team royally.
Good challenge by Indy, they should get this reversed. Carlos took 3 steps before he fell.
That was much less of a catch than Calvin Johnson's non-catch.
Tits! Carlos still can't catch.
It's official - I have no idea what constitutes a catch anymore.
Punts being returned! Still getting used to that.
Carlos Rogers couldn't catch gonorrhea in Dave's mom's sleeping bag.
Dwight Freeney with a Yankees hat. Bad karma.
Collinsworth is really good - great comment about the fullback (Sellers) blocking backside on the counters. Not something you see every day.
because i know you care, i need 14 yards from chris cooley to win my fantasy game this week. i expect him to be kept in to block.
also, fuck.
What a fascinating turn of events.
"LaRon Landry was trying to disguise his coverage.".
As good.
Ok, get the big play out the way...
Final score...7-6 Colts.
I was told that everyone could run on the Colts. Liars...
I might go to bed after the first quarter.
I would like to revise my prediction to Colts 54, Redskins 0.
Its gonna be 14-0 before I can finish my first Arrogant Bastard Ale,
Yep, I'm getting vibes of a reboot of that Philly night game the first year under Spurrier. At FedEx, fans had started feeling good about the team, then a mercilous drubbing.
You started your own brewing company?
All falling into place. Phillies took the lead already. Staying on the couch for fear of slipping, falling down some stairs, and getting my scrotum caught on a bannister splinter.
Why can't Al say "New Orleans" properly?
Damn it Carlos.
"Amoeba Defense" - somebody start a band immediately.
My girlfriend committed a "sack fumble" the other night when she treated them like craps dice. Total mood killer.
Cooley...needs 1 more yard for rob. Nervous...
Let's stop running the ball. Forever.
The Skin's Yards After Catch has got to be a league low.
technically, 3 more yards, geoff. though i may petition the league for points for his blocking on that drive.
that was a remarkably competent drive.
All Torain.
Yuk yuk yuk.
Somebody catch the ball, please. That's three.
If you see a football...swat it to the ground.
Somebody call Lester Hayes. We need some fucking stickum.
Bullshit on that forward progress call. Way to be a simpleton, ref.
All this jittering about on the line is having no impact. Aside from giving me a tick.
that shit was clinical
Haslett looks like he'll adjust to this hurry-up by Week 9.
Took the 49ers three seasons to learn that Andre Carter can't play OLB. Took Haslett 3 weeks. I respect that.
New score prediction: Colts 42, Redskins 35.
80+ yards in 3 minutes - it's the anti-Gibbs offense.
Kareem Moore won the starting spot via a call-in raffle on WTEM, yes?
Al Michaels - Crisp Shirt.
Anyone see J. Campbell's numbers today? Explains a lot.
Wow - 10.7 QB rating? That is some impressive sucking.
hensley 'bam bam' meulens is the giants' hitting coach. this makes me happy. i knew him when he played in the carolina league for the prince william cannons.
They're not stopping Manning rushing 4.
Speaking of "Tits!," I told the zwoman that I was going to bill my tits off this weekend, and now she uses "my tits off" all the time. Like "I brought the laundry up, now I'm going to fold my tits off." She thinks that's funny.
What she didn't think was funny is that her friend got some sort of staph infection in her nipple, and I couldn't remember her name so I said "How's what's-her-face with the fucked up titties?"
So remember that: doing something until your tits are off is funny, but fucked up titties is not funny.
Campbell was Collinseque (Todd or Kerry).
Wow. Vinatieri makes that in his sleep. (Gano makes that in practice... sometimes.) Big break.
I once hooked up with a girl with such fucked up titties that it prematurely ended a hookup. I removed her bra, and the horrified look on my face caused her to cry. It looked like two torpedoes diving for her waistline.
Was she 60?
Just flipped over to watch the Giants drop an infield pop-up. I need to stop doing that.
No, she was like 24...and not overweight. It was unexpected...which explains my surprise at seeing the hideousness.
Squirrel, please have a little talk with Cooley.
Please come up with this ball.
Squirrel, please pay my taxes.
i fear that little rogers imitation will cost me.
like you and your offshore accounts pay taxes, geoff
carlos rogers has no idea what pierre garcon just did
I didn't say that I pay my taxes...just that I thought it'd be nice if you paid them for me.
Need some points on this drive.
who the fuck is wearing cody ross's uniform?
Might be bedtime.
i'm now the proud owner of the worst 4-2 team in fantasy history
ganope
20-7. Game. Over.
Hmmm...another break. Interesting.
I think this lead will hold up for the Colts. Manning is unimpressed with this 3-4 thing.
verrry sneaky, oklahoma
So I have had a 50 inch Samsung DLP tv in my basement for 3 years. Yesterday a white spot the size of a pin showed up on the tv. Today another showed up. I just googled the problem and apparently my tv will be covered with these spots in a matter of days. I feel like my tv got genital warts or something. Its a defect that Samsung will come out and fix for free...but it sucks.
Stink. Stank. Stunk.
This game feels over. The Colts are just a lot better than the Redskins. This is news to no one.
Zombies are the new vampires.
Just benched the Riggo jersey in favor of Darrell Green. Look for positive results immediately.
Holy shit. I was kidding.
Orakpo..best player on the team.
FG here would be a setback. Need a TD to be in the game.
Boom goes the dynamite.
Darrell Green, still making things happen. Holy fuck. That's all it took?
I also took my pants off...let's not overlook that.
Be careful. Last time you ended up with two children.
Tell Tarkanian the amoeba defense isn't working.
Pierre Garcon seems like a fake name you'd take if witness protection sent you to France.
My wife is safely upstairs...allegedly alone.
Reed Doughty...commitment to excrement.
Worst safety play in the NFL. Mark Murphy is rolling over in his grave and barfing on Alvin Walton.
Remember Alvin Walton's triangle haircut? When i was a kid, that was both confusing and awesome.
Murder in a Toyota 4-Runner and a kidnapping in a Chevy Tahoe on the next Law & Order: SUV.
Bad jokes brought to you by the defensive backfield work o Reed Doughty.
Best play of Sellers life?
Angerer is pissing me off.
Just when I think I'm out, they pull me back in.
If your last name is Moore, you've crapped your pants in this game tonight.
Sack took them out of Gano's range.
Name the best Redskins kicker since Mark Mosely?
Speaking of out, did mayhugh go to bed? Or did Geoff's pants off scare him off?
Ask your doctor if Cialis for daily use is right for you. Also, ask your friends if you're actually good looking and cool enough to warrant daily use.
Who do you think took my pants off? Mayhugh's upstairs pressing them.
Chip Lohmiller.
I wish I could sell of some of my superfluous erections.
Good call...totally forgot about Johnny Field Goal. After him, its a parade of Scott Blanton's and Nick Novak's.
Do roosters have nuggets?
Skins cannot stop Manning. Its turnovers or touchdowns. Very frustrating.
Haynesworth is in the luxury box? Not on the field? Ugh.
Like I said...
Defense showing its nuggets tonight.
Igor...its worse than that. Haynesworth's charitable foundation owns a box at FedEx. Seriously.
At some point, you stop taking the nitrates for chest pain and take the damn Viagra, right?
What a disaster.
Nice 3rd and 1 playcall with a big bruising back, Richie Petitbon.
Reed Doughty should just come to my home and kick me in the balls.
He'd misread Google Maps and end up in Vermont. And miss when he tried.
Skins will be 3-3 and I believe they have the Bears next week. Playoffs still unlikely...but improving.
Thank God they instituted that 3-man wedge rule. Otherwise someone might hit someone. This will be a much safer game once we go with flags and stop this barbaric blocking and tackling.
Nice sense of urgency, smilla.
Really wishing Gano didn't suck so bad now, eh?
Not much of a hold to call back a TD, assfuck.
Geoff, did you step away so mayhugh could measure your inseam, so to speak?
I was switching from beer to bourbon....this takes time.
This seems like a bridge too far.
Say no more. And good call.
French for "The Ron."
Good first play.
Good second.
Let's hope this doesn't play out like the Godfather films.
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