Saturday, October 16, 2010

Dag. Ger.

FOG:TB Robbie Hummel is out for the season after injuring his ACL in the second drill of the season. The NCAA is in the process of deciding whether to grant him a 13th year of eligibility.

214 comments:

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zman said...

I live next door to an old guy from Chicago. He got on the elevator this morning with a soggy cigar clenched in his teeth and said "Did you see that game last night? I hate the Yankees. But when I saw George Bush on TV I had to root for them. The Rangers should ban that stupid sonofabitch from games, otherwise the entire nation will turn against them!"

T.J. said...

Hummel got pummeled.

TR said...

Yeah, he's positively flummoxed!

Wait? That doesn't rhyme? I should go fuck myself?

Tough crowd here.

rob said...

i often hear commentators talk about christian ponder's talent, but i don't think i've ever seen him play well

Danimal said...

Yes. Very Dave. Tho in his defense that I N T was a tipped pass.

Danimal said...

Dave? was supposed to say "average"
Got me one of those new smaaht phones which ain't too smaaht

Danimal said...

Ok
He sucks

rob said...

who, dave?

Danimal said...

No. Dave's on 2nd.

Mark said...

Nice slate of 3:30 games we've got ahead of us here.

What's that? Am I nervous about Mississippi State tonight? Why yes. Yes I am.

/jams self

Mark said...

Oh, and I've been to Auburn recently for a game. Let me assure you, those redneck motherfuckers LOVE Zombie Nation. 30 times a game, minimum.

Mark said...

Texas...I like what you're doing here.

T.J. said...

Gary Danielson just commended Bobby Petrino for being able to think to or three plays ahead? Isn't that like applauding a dentist for being able to open a patient's mouth?

Mark said...

Wait a minute, Bobby Humphrey's kid plays for Auburn? Fuck me. I am old as fuck.

Mark said...

Cam Newton. Manbeast.

T.J. said...

Danimal's phone thinks "very avergae" equals "Dave"? That phone has quite a sense of humor.

T.J. said...

Elvis Andrus is a pesky little fuck.

Mark said...

Two TVs is not even close to sufficient right now.

rob said...

nice to see the rangers down early

mayhugh said...

CBS fell asleep at the switch - Ryan Mallett went into the locker room right under their nose.

T.J. said...

Greg Childs is a manbeast.

T.J. said...

Why does Jeff Tedford still have a job? I want Mike Leach on the Cal campus.

T.J. said...

Robinson Cano is locked in...jesus.

mayhugh said...

Does Arkansas employ a full time engraver for all those student names? Seems to be a waste of resources.

Mark said...

Auburn is incapable of playing a football game that isnt wildly entertaining.

T.J. said...

Oh goodie - time for the Rangers bullpen.

rob said...

texas' crowd is dead-solid convinced they're going to blow this.

mayhugh said...

Seriously, this game is awesome. Who needs defense.

mayhugh said...

I'm speaking about Auburn-ARK. I'm definitely NOT watching baseball.

Mark said...

Defense isn't even optional in this game. Michigan-Iowa has suddenly gotten interesting as well.

Mark said...

Are both teams going to go for 50? I feel like that's a legitimate possibility. Bananas.

Mark said...

Actually. It's nearly a lock that both teams will go for 50+. Will someone break 60?

mayhugh said...

You know what's only slightly better than the defense in this game? The officiating.

Mark said...

I'm not sure, but I think Arkansas got fucked twice on replays and it cost them 2 turnovers and 14 points.

Danimal said...

just gettin back in the mix...love the skinit.com commercials, or commercial rather

Danimal said...

i don't know who's who in the lsu mcneese state game.
the o/u on pryor INT's tonight (and i don't know if he's thrown any yet)...i'm going w/3.

Danimal said...

parents went to "mass" 3 hours ago...mark - are they w/you

Mark said...

I agree, Dan. The blonde is hot, and slutty.

And yes, your folks are here. Dad and I just knocked back a couple lines.

Danimal said...

pat forde is such the twitter whore. can someone stop him? please.
parents just rolled in....they're bouncin.

Danimal said...

Erin just said "pounding it in" hee hee

rob said...

click clack's about to lose to kentucky

Danimal said...

Wow. Had the wrong game on. Could b a great finish

Mark said...

South Carolina...nice to see you again.

Mark said...

Al Toon's kid is named Nick Toon. I find this very, very amusing.

Mark said...

Florida is terrible. This is not debatable.

Danimal said...

Osu toast

Mark said...

2 minutes to play. Florida down 3 with the ball on their own 4 yard line. Kicker out. Season on the line. Confidence level: Subterranean.

Mark said...

Fuck me. Florida sucks.

Danimal said...

florida loss + osu loss + nd win = declan gets a christmas this year. thank the lord baby jesus. mark - i feel your pain. have felt it since 1993 actually.

Mark said...

My pain is expressed through copious amounts of liquor. FUUUUUUUUUCK.

rob said...

bodhi's about to surf the 50-year storm, if that's any consolation

Mark said...

It is. What channel?

Danimal said...

i am an fbi agent but can't find the channel.

Mark said...

I've informed my friend Vitas that I blame his recent marriage for the downfall of Florida football.

Danimal said...

wilson's beard is definitely colored no? is that real?

Danimal said...

how bout that catcher's helmet? it's sceery.
what else you guys wanna talk about?

Mark said...

How about we talk about this Brad Lidge character? Pretty shaky, eh?

rob said...

bodhi really does a shitty job surfing that wave. at least carve a little bit before taking the dive.

T.J. said...

Raul Ibanez, ya gotta swing buddy...

Mark said...

Anybody want to take a trip down to Florida and stab me in the eye?

T.J. said...

*purchases eticket*

T.J. said...

Jake Locker looking good right there.

I expect a pick six on his next possession.

Danimal said...

i love me some kiss commercials

rob - thanks for the answering the channel question. preesh. no, i can't look for it. just tell me the FUCKING CHANNEL!!!!!

Danimal said...

be back in a second

Danimal said...

rob - how's that calf muscle? you gonna make that 1/2 marathon...which is when?

Mark said...

Danimal...was supposed to head to Jax for the Cocktail Party. Not looking like that's gonna happen now. However, I will be up there for Jags-Texans in early November. Holler at your boy...

Washington-Oregon state is going to cause me to stay up way to late and drink way too much.


Florida is fucking horrible.

T.J. said...

Mike Vrabel, TD catch.

And Nate Burleson quiets New Meadowlands early...

mayhugh said...

Are they going to make a sequel to Blindside where Michael Oher holds every time on the outside rush and can't remember the snap count? I don't think that was appropriately covered in the first installment.

mayhugh said...

And 10 seconds after post type that, another false start...

zman said...

Too bad Jay Cutler is back, I miss seeing Todd Collins' miserable stat lines.

Dave said...

had to listen to the giants on the radio today-- some cable stand-off and my aerial wasn't doing the trick.

mayhugh said...

Serioulsy, Minnesoata, do me the favor that Detroit and Atlanta couldn't today - one NFC team has to drop aside from the Skins (probably).

That INT helps. Why can't Dallas help themselves with the passing? They've converted every third and one with a running play and then decide to throw it...

mayhugh said...

Albert Haynesworth: Inactive - Coach's Decision.

rob said...

jay glazer's tweet machine said that was going to happen - related to his brother's death

rob said...

carlos rogers' hands write their own jokes at this point

rob said...

and then drop them

mayhugh said...

Oh right. I think that's excusable. Also inactive is Rocky McIntosh, so we get more of H.B. Blades, whom I really enjoy.

mayhugh said...

Rogers' hands are a liability, at least on this play.

Geoff said...

If they rule this a catch for Rogers, he becomes the biggest asshole in history. He can't catch when it matters, he does catch when he can fuck his team royally.

mayhugh said...

Good challenge by Indy, they should get this reversed. Carlos took 3 steps before he fell.

Geoff said...

That was much less of a catch than Calvin Johnson's non-catch.

Geoff said...

Tits! Carlos still can't catch.

mayhugh said...

It's official - I have no idea what constitutes a catch anymore.

mayhugh said...

Punts being returned! Still getting used to that.

Igor said...

Carlos Rogers couldn't catch gonorrhea in Dave's mom's sleeping bag.

Igor said...

Dwight Freeney with a Yankees hat. Bad karma.

mayhugh said...

Collinsworth is really good - great comment about the fullback (Sellers) blocking backside on the counters. Not something you see every day.

rob said...

because i know you care, i need 14 yards from chris cooley to win my fantasy game this week. i expect him to be kept in to block.

also, fuck.

Geoff said...

What a fascinating turn of events.

Igor said...

"LaRon Landry was trying to disguise his coverage.".

As good.

mayhugh said...

Ok, get the big play out the way...

Geoff said...

Final score...7-6 Colts.

Geoff said...

I was told that everyone could run on the Colts. Liars...

mayhugh said...

I might go to bed after the first quarter.

Geoff said...

I would like to revise my prediction to Colts 54, Redskins 0.

Geoff said...

Its gonna be 14-0 before I can finish my first Arrogant Bastard Ale,

mayhugh said...

Yep, I'm getting vibes of a reboot of that Philly night game the first year under Spurrier. At FedEx, fans had started feeling good about the team, then a mercilous drubbing.

mayhugh said...

You started your own brewing company?

Igor said...

All falling into place. Phillies took the lead already. Staying on the couch for fear of slipping, falling down some stairs, and getting my scrotum caught on a bannister splinter.

T.J. said...

Why can't Al say "New Orleans" properly?

mayhugh said...

Damn it Carlos.

mayhugh said...

"Amoeba Defense" - somebody start a band immediately.

Igor said...

My girlfriend committed a "sack fumble" the other night when she treated them like craps dice. Total mood killer.

Geoff said...

Cooley...needs 1 more yard for rob. Nervous...

Geoff said...

Let's stop running the ball. Forever.

mayhugh said...

The Skin's Yards After Catch has got to be a league low.

rob said...

technically, 3 more yards, geoff. though i may petition the league for points for his blocking on that drive.

rob said...

that was a remarkably competent drive.

Igor said...

All Torain.

Yuk yuk yuk.

mayhugh said...

Somebody catch the ball, please. That's three.

Geoff said...

If you see a football...swat it to the ground.

Igor said...

Somebody call Lester Hayes. We need some fucking stickum.

Igor said...

Bullshit on that forward progress call. Way to be a simpleton, ref.

mayhugh said...

All this jittering about on the line is having no impact. Aside from giving me a tick.

rob said...

that shit was clinical

Igor said...

Haslett looks like he'll adjust to this hurry-up by Week 9.

Geoff said...

Took the 49ers three seasons to learn that Andre Carter can't play OLB. Took Haslett 3 weeks. I respect that.

New score prediction: Colts 42, Redskins 35.

mayhugh said...

80+ yards in 3 minutes - it's the anti-Gibbs offense.

Igor said...

Kareem Moore won the starting spot via a call-in raffle on WTEM, yes?

mayhugh said...

Al Michaels - Crisp Shirt.

Geoff said...

Anyone see J. Campbell's numbers today? Explains a lot.

mayhugh said...

Wow - 10.7 QB rating? That is some impressive sucking.

rob said...

hensley 'bam bam' meulens is the giants' hitting coach. this makes me happy. i knew him when he played in the carolina league for the prince william cannons.

mayhugh said...

They're not stopping Manning rushing 4.

zman said...

Speaking of "Tits!," I told the zwoman that I was going to bill my tits off this weekend, and now she uses "my tits off" all the time. Like "I brought the laundry up, now I'm going to fold my tits off." She thinks that's funny.

What she didn't think was funny is that her friend got some sort of staph infection in her nipple, and I couldn't remember her name so I said "How's what's-her-face with the fucked up titties?"

So remember that: doing something until your tits are off is funny, but fucked up titties is not funny.

zman said...

Campbell was Collinseque (Todd or Kerry).

Igor said...

Wow. Vinatieri makes that in his sleep. (Gano makes that in practice... sometimes.) Big break.

Geoff said...

I once hooked up with a girl with such fucked up titties that it prematurely ended a hookup. I removed her bra, and the horrified look on my face caused her to cry. It looked like two torpedoes diving for her waistline.

mayhugh said...

Was she 60?

Igor said...

Just flipped over to watch the Giants drop an infield pop-up. I need to stop doing that.

Geoff said...

No, she was like 24...and not overweight. It was unexpected...which explains my surprise at seeing the hideousness.

Igor said...

Squirrel, please have a little talk with Cooley.

mayhugh said...

Please come up with this ball.

Geoff said...

Squirrel, please pay my taxes.

rob said...

i fear that little rogers imitation will cost me.

rob said...

like you and your offshore accounts pay taxes, geoff

rob said...

carlos rogers has no idea what pierre garcon just did

Geoff said...

I didn't say that I pay my taxes...just that I thought it'd be nice if you paid them for me.

mayhugh said...

Need some points on this drive.

rob said...

who the fuck is wearing cody ross's uniform?

mayhugh said...

Might be bedtime.

rob said...

i'm now the proud owner of the worst 4-2 team in fantasy history

rob said...

ganope

Geoff said...

20-7. Game. Over.

Geoff said...

Hmmm...another break. Interesting.

mayhugh said...

I think this lead will hold up for the Colts. Manning is unimpressed with this 3-4 thing.

rob said...

verrry sneaky, oklahoma

Geoff said...

So I have had a 50 inch Samsung DLP tv in my basement for 3 years. Yesterday a white spot the size of a pin showed up on the tv. Today another showed up. I just googled the problem and apparently my tv will be covered with these spots in a matter of days. I feel like my tv got genital warts or something. Its a defect that Samsung will come out and fix for free...but it sucks.

Igor said...

Stink. Stank. Stunk.

Geoff said...

This game feels over. The Colts are just a lot better than the Redskins. This is news to no one.

zman said...

Zombies are the new vampires.

Igor said...

Just benched the Riggo jersey in favor of Darrell Green. Look for positive results immediately.

Igor said...

Holy shit. I was kidding.

Geoff said...

Orakpo..best player on the team.

Geoff said...

FG here would be a setback. Need a TD to be in the game.

Geoff said...

Boom goes the dynamite.

Igor said...

Darrell Green, still making things happen. Holy fuck. That's all it took?

Geoff said...

I also took my pants off...let's not overlook that.

Igor said...

Be careful. Last time you ended up with two children.

Geoff said...

Tell Tarkanian the amoeba defense isn't working.

Igor said...

Pierre Garcon seems like a fake name you'd take if witness protection sent you to France.

Geoff said...

My wife is safely upstairs...allegedly alone.

Geoff said...

Reed Doughty...commitment to excrement.

Igor said...

Worst safety play in the NFL. Mark Murphy is rolling over in his grave and barfing on Alvin Walton.

Geoff said...

Remember Alvin Walton's triangle haircut? When i was a kid, that was both confusing and awesome.

Igor said...

Murder in a Toyota 4-Runner and a kidnapping in a Chevy Tahoe on the next Law & Order: SUV.

Bad jokes brought to you by the defensive backfield work o Reed Doughty.

Geoff said...

Best play of Sellers life?

Igor said...

Angerer is pissing me off.

Geoff said...

Just when I think I'm out, they pull me back in.

Igor said...

If your last name is Moore, you've crapped your pants in this game tonight.

Igor said...

Sack took them out of Gano's range.

Geoff said...

Name the best Redskins kicker since Mark Mosely?

Igor said...

Speaking of out, did mayhugh go to bed? Or did Geoff's pants off scare him off?

Igor said...

Ask your doctor if Cialis for daily use is right for you. Also, ask your friends if you're actually good looking and cool enough to warrant daily use.

Geoff said...

Who do you think took my pants off? Mayhugh's upstairs pressing them.

Igor said...

Chip Lohmiller.

Geoff said...

I wish I could sell of some of my superfluous erections.

Geoff said...

Good call...totally forgot about Johnny Field Goal. After him, its a parade of Scott Blanton's and Nick Novak's.

Igor said...

Do roosters have nuggets?

Geoff said...

Skins cannot stop Manning. Its turnovers or touchdowns. Very frustrating.

Igor said...

Haynesworth is in the luxury box? Not on the field? Ugh.

Geoff said...

Like I said...

Igor said...

Defense showing its nuggets tonight.

Geoff said...

Igor...its worse than that. Haynesworth's charitable foundation owns a box at FedEx. Seriously.

Igor said...

At some point, you stop taking the nitrates for chest pain and take the damn Viagra, right?

Geoff said...

What a disaster.

Igor said...

Nice 3rd and 1 playcall with a big bruising back, Richie Petitbon.

Geoff said...

Reed Doughty should just come to my home and kick me in the balls.

Igor said...

He'd misread Google Maps and end up in Vermont. And miss when he tried.

Geoff said...

Skins will be 3-3 and I believe they have the Bears next week. Playoffs still unlikely...but improving.

Igor said...

Thank God they instituted that 3-man wedge rule. Otherwise someone might hit someone. This will be a much safer game once we go with flags and stop this barbaric blocking and tackling.

Igor said...

Nice sense of urgency, smilla.

Igor said...

Really wishing Gano didn't suck so bad now, eh?

Igor said...

Not much of a hold to call back a TD, assfuck.

Igor said...

Geoff, did you step away so mayhugh could measure your inseam, so to speak?

Geoff said...

I was switching from beer to bourbon....this takes time.

Geoff said...

This seems like a bridge too far.

Igor said...

Say no more. And good call.

Geoff said...

French for "The Ron."

Igor said...

Good first play.
Good second.

Let's hope this doesn't play out like the Godfather films.

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