Wednesday, July 07, 2010

My Favorite Team's Likely Small Forward This Year Looks Like a Serial Killer. Sweet.

Barring a miracle on ESPN tomorrow night, it appears my Knicks will be shut out of the Big Three free agents in the market. I'll save the argument that Bosh should not be lumped in with Wade and Bron Bron for another day. But this news means that the Knicks are increasingly likely to add some overpaid turds to their roster in a half-baked effort to win fans over and convince them that these pieces were worth tanking the last two years and giving away Jordan Hill so the Rockets would take Jared Jeffries' gankly corpse with him. The names being thrown around include Raymond Felton, Luke Ridnour and Jason Williams (the white-trash one, not the murderer or the bad motorcycle rider). And Mike Miller. The same Mike Miller who, like Danilo Galinari, plays small forward, doesn't rebound and lives behind the arc. The same Mike Miller who wears his hair like a woman. Like one specific abused prostitute turned murderer, to be exact. Ugh.

27 comments:

T.J. said...

That. Is. Awesome.

d-train said...

none of guys or gals are actually russian spys are ya?

Marls said...

Igor and Comrade Truck are. They have been trying to kill Squirrel & Moose (The Teej) for years.

Greg said...

They're not booing the Teej. They're saying "Moose".

d-train said...

and knuckle

Squeaky said...

Hate the Vuvuzela?

Will it Blend?
http://tbz.me/yV4hi

zman said...

http://awkwardfamilypetphotos.com/

rob said...

planning to drink a beer in a bit. will announce my beverage choice live here at 2:00. tune in for all the details.

rob said...

stewart scott's involved in the lebron shitshow tomorrow? of fucking course he is.

T.J. said...

Spell his name right please.

rob said...

fuck that

Mark said...

Easy Rob, Stu's got his (good) eye on you...

TR said...

A co-worker just told me that Jarred Dudley just tweeted that his sources say Bron Bron is coming to New York. I don't know if his source is Amare (I know I'm missing a ' in the name somewhere, but I'm too lazy to look it up to see where it goes).

I find this uncertainty a bit uncomfortable. And the immediate raising of my hopes will make any other news all that much more tragic.

I think it's unlikely LBJ would go to a Boys and Girls Club in Connecticut to announce he's staying in Cleveland. But the Stu Scott factor changes everything.

rob said...

after heavy negotiations, my team of advisors and i have selected stone pale ale as our beer of choice. i know that the people from sam adams summer ale are disappointed, but i had to do what was best for me and my family.

Clarence said...

Hello??? We're waiting, Rob. We've been here since 2:00 to find out what you're drinking. Come on!

Squeaky said...

Wow that was a let down. The first half and the beer selection.

d-train said...

it's disappointing on so many levels - to be somewhat expected though. for example - 2:00??? he's in cape cod...on vacation...and he doesn't start drinking until 2:00??? and then when he does finally start drinking, he's drinking a pale ale? i'm irritated thinking about it. oh if i were only on vacation in some high falutin wasp enclave in the middle of summer...i'd be pissed drunk right now. he just doesn't appreciate anything. sad. very sad.

T.J. said...

How's the Pale Ale, Stiffler?

rob said...

i was waiting to see what happened to the other beers. after the last dogfish head 60 minute went down last night, the choice became clear.

rob said...

d-train, as a man of the people, you'll no doubt be disappointed to learn that dave and i will be attending a cocktail party in the tony confines of chatham this evening. we'll almost certainly make fun of the unwashed middle classes.

d-train said...

as in new jersey? are you guys workin valet?

rob said...

msg shares are up 7% on 5x volume based on the lebron-knicks rumor. smart money or short opportunity?

Clarence said...

If we had the time, a full-blown parody of Rob's beer press conference would have been a nice post. But we don't.

rob said...

rhombus fail

Marls said...

Ochostinko is tweeting that Lebron is going to the Knicks. This is just stupid.

Shlara said...

I like Mike Miller. He was the one of the VERY few bright spots in the Wizards season last year.

Shlara said...

Wait, Bron is broadcasting his big decision from Greenwich, CT? Not Bristol? or Akron? Really??