Friday, May 25, 2018

Sream and Roor Will Smoke You

Martin Birzle (as in, fo' shirzle my Birzle) is an award-winning designer and manufacturer of smokers' products. Mr. Birzle owns Roor International BV, which is headquartered in Germany, and he sells his high-quality borosilicate hand-blown jointed-glass water pipes under the Roor trademark.


The Roor mark is the subject of three registrations with the US Patent and Trademark Office. To put it more plainly, Birzle sells fancy glass bongs--so fancy that they have trademarks associated with them. Don't laugh! Roor bongs start at $300 each. Roor sales in the United states alone have been in excess of $5,000,000 for the last three years. That's a lot of green.


I know all of this because Roor and its licensed US distributor, Sream, Inc., sued Arzumanara Corporation in the US District Court for the Southern District of Florida for trademark infringement, asserting that Arzumanara sells knock-off Roor bongs. Fugazis if you will.

It turns out that Arzumanara does business as "Food Zone 619" which, according to Yelp, appears to be a bodega in Homestead, FL (about 15-20 miles outside of Miami). Remarkably, this isn't the first time Sream and Roor took legal action to enforce the Roor marks. It appears that Sream filed 313 complaints (313!?!) in the past two to three years, mostly against what appear to be mom-and-pop food stores or gas stations that sell cheap glass bongs under the counter.

Their complaints are filed almost exclusively in C.D. Cal. (which covers LA), S.D. Fla. (Miami), S.D.N.Y. (Manhattan), E.D.N.Y. (Brooklyn Queens Staten and LI), and E.D. La. (New Orleans). They seem to focus on places where pot is plentiful.


None of this makes a ton of sense to me. How do you walk into federal court and assert trademark protection over a product used to commit a federal crime?

via GIPHY


Apparently they don't walk into court too often, instead they settle. And that's likely a great way to make money. Even if they only get $10,000 per settlement, that's over $3 million for 313 cases. Once their attorney takes his contingent fee cut they're left with at least $2 million.

So if you're selling bootleg Roor bongs in the back of your bodega, stop now! Or else Birzle will put a hurtin' on you! I'm looking at you Mark.

17 comments:

rob said...

this is a sublime intersection of gheorghie interests

Whitney said...

Zman, people could smoke tobacco out of those bongs. They don't, but they could.

Whitney said...

Everybody getting an early jump on Memorial Weekend?

Whitney said...

Our fratre Kevin Reynolds was this US Congressman's chief of staff:

https://www.politico.com/story/2018/05/25/tom-garrett-staff-servants-608665

No wonder he left this role to be a professional wrestling manager.

Marls said...

OMG, interns doing menial tasks!?! Maybe they went over the line but sending interns to pick up laundry does not seem that out of line.

Whitney said...

Interns/goats

Dave said...

rock star footage of dave up at sentence of dave!

Mark said...

Daytona by Pusha T is only 7 tracks and true to form for Pusha it’s just him rapping about selling coke but it’s fantastic. Like really, really great. Kanye’s beats are great and Pusha is in rare form. I highly recommend.

zman said...

Who doesn't love coke rhymes?

zman said...

I bet he made Weenie play tinkle.

Mark said...

I finally got around to reading the actual content of this post. I know plenty of gas stations that have probably settled these suits. Pipes and bongs are popular items at shady gas stations in Florida. I’ve never purchased one at these establishments. A man has to have standards.

As for Homestead, most of you have heard of it even if you don’t realize it. It’s the area (and former AFB) that was absolutely destroyed by Hurricane Andrew. And I very much mean destroyed.

mr kq said...

Got interviewed on the street outside my work by Fox5 DC yesterday. Topic was growing hemp and weed and legalization. Mentioned I thought it should be legal even though I don't really smoke anymore. Seemed to go over well with my 17 and 19 year old. Posted it on all their stories and whatnot.

Whitney said...

I know many of the gheorgies don’t know Mr. KQ personally, but you may know him better by his handle in the 1970’s: Cheech.

TR said...

Would be a lot cooler if Mr KQ referred to it as grass.

I love old fashioned pot references.

Mark said...

Much of it is the current culture of sports we exist in but LeBron is (somehow) still under appreciated. You could put him in 3 different spots in your all time starting 5 and he’d fit. Nobody like him.

Mark said...

If we’re talking old school pot references, I’ll go with Reefer.

Unknown said...

Smadav 2019 also able to clean the virus that is already infecting your computer and fix registry altered by the virus. Other Antivirus usually not done cleaning the registry so that the computer has not returned to normal after cleaning the antivirus. Many supporting tools are included in Smadav as a weapon to do the cleaning of the virus.