Thursday, December 05, 2013

The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day 2

On the second day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me...

Two names
A fat guy in a jer-sey


I knocked zwoman up again.



Yesterday we learned that we're having a girl. In honor of Gheorghemas' second day, I ask you, dear readers, to submit two names (first and middle) for zdaughter. I will christen zdaughter with the best submission (note that this is 100% not going to happen given that zwoman reserves the right to use her executive zveto in this matter).

Factors that will be considered include flourish, flow, flippancy, originality, monogram potential, alliteration, allusion, Ghostfaciacity, Buffalo Billsiness, dopeness, anything involving a Joan Harris gif, and of course Gheorgheness, as well as anything else that strikes my fancy upon review.

Please use the following format:

[first name] [middle name] zdaughter

For example, Xaviera Yasmeen zdaughter.

It's bad enough that my child will bear whatever moniker you clowns come up with, there's no need to drag her real last name into this lest someday she reenacts Marlo's "my name is my name" speech when she hears that her name was on the internet.



I look forward to your comments. Have fun, but remember ... this is my little girl you're talking about here.



Merry Gheorghemas!!

60 comments:

T.J. said...

Orenthalia Jane Zsurname

T.J. said...

And congrats, zfamily.

TR said...

Zelda Rezvan Zoltan

(Only fair to give a shout-out to the biological father. No offense.)

Danimal said...

Za Za Zlastname



rob said...

jacqueline urbont zdaughter

rob said...

ferguson delamielleure zdaughter. she'll go by zfergie.

Danimal said...

"danielaz" ought to be in there too somewhere.

also - congrats on the sex man! that's awwwwwwwwwsome!

T.J. said...

that Sopranos clip is fantastic

rootsminer said...

Bonita Applebum Zdaughter

Congrats on the coming attraction!

Geoff said...

Gabrielle Imogene Zdaughter. GIZ

zman said...

These are all quite good but Teedge is the leader right now.

I just got off a call where someone barked at me "I don't know who the hell you are, sir!" and it took all my strength to avoid launching into "My name is my name!"

T.J. said...

"WIPE THAT FACE OFF YOUR FACE"
- The DLC

Marls said...

Sicne you named your son after my first cat, I think you should name ZDaughter after my current cat.

Shea ZDaughter

rob said...

single name - reich zdaughter. she will marry kiko alonzo, and her initials at that point will be rza.

Mark said...

Kemba Shabazz Zdaughter, duh.

Mark said...

Rob's sources on FSU leaving for Charlotte were off. Noles aren't leaving today. Winston will participate in a presser in Tallahassee at 7 pm today.

So, he's not being charged. Nobody holds a presser to talk about being charged with a felony, right?

Greg said...

La Duderina Znomdeguerre'

rob said...

to be fair, my sources are far from unimpeachable.

rob said...

i'm hunkering down for chili dogs and beers at the vienna inn this evening with various fogtb, including buck, elmo, fubsy, and hoopie. (as it turns out, we're all actually muppets.)

join us, if you like. we'll be there beginning at 6:00.

Mark said...

Chili dogs are near or at the top of my most overrated foods list. Come fight me.

rob said...

i'm there for the camaraderie. i can take or leave the chili dogs.

Shlara said...

mazel Zman!

and I decided to watch that Sopranos clip while eating lunch....very bad idea

Mark said...

2nd entry: Daenerys Targaryen Zdaughter.

Jessica said...

Congrats!!

Zoey
Zenith
Zena
Zaria

But, really Hermione Katniss.

TR said...

In news that should surprise nobody, I absolutely love chili dogs. In the summers after my freshman and sophomore years in college (when we couldn't regularly get into bars underage), some hometown friends and I would often drive around the beach under the influence of something, and then make a stop at 7-Eleven for diarrhea dogs. Essentially, we'd get the footlong and see who could put more ridiculous toppings. Chili, cheese sauce, onions, jalapenos, ketchup, mustard, crumbled chocodile bits, etc. Those meals contributed to my generally svelte physique during those years.

What I don't love are those hot dogs that came out in the 1980's that had chili in the middle. That shit was just gross.

Geoff said...

I'm in a meeting where we are spending an hour discussing an actual cracker factory...and I have a million jokes and no one to tell them to.

Dave said...

congrats zman!

ezra george zdaughter

i always get confused about the gender of george eliot and ezra pound (not that this will help matters).

T.J. said...

geoff, that sounds like the greatest meeting ever

T.J. said...

"crumbled chocodile bits"

that's impressive

Geoff said...

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kirk-Van-Houten-Big-Wheel-down-at-the-Cracker-Factory/187802244621020

rob said...

ezra *gheorghe*, dave, you fucking idiot.

zman said...

Daenerys Targaryen and Katniss will be strong contenders with zwoman.

zman said...

What type of crackers does the factory make? Nothing too newfangled and progressive like Combos I hope. Something conservative and tradtional like Wheat Thins or Tricuits, crackers with traditional values and family-friendly ingredients.

Geoff said...

We have not discussed the type of cracker. Focused on how to build it/find trained workers to construct. Determined to work "big wheel down at the cracker factory" into the discussion.

Jessica said...

I legit like some of the Game of Thrones character names...Arya, Sansa...but naming your girl that means you know as a character they will be killed off at some point.

zman said...

Then I assume the cracker factory is in Iraq?

I honestly don't see Daenerys getting killed anytime soon. She has dragons fer fuck's sake.

Jessica said...

Also, please, please pick a name from here. You will be my 2nd friend letting social media name their baby. Other one was a public FB vote/fight of Michael vs. Luke. Luke won.

rob said...

so the hashtag #fsucleatchaser will be entering the lexicon

rob said...

also, i heartily endorse the teej's position that certain people should have their tweeting privileges revoked in the wake of the winston announcement. nbc sports radio, for example.

rob said...

nice meter in the gheorghemas day two lyric, z. woulda thought that a rap aficionado could knock that shit out of the park.

zman said...

How about "two baby names" instead? I hoped Dave would propose a name in iambic pentameter but then I remembered that he hates plays (even though he teaches Shakespeare for a living).

Dave said...

iambic names are rare, most names are trochaic.

samantha zebra zwoman?

and i do hate plays. i like it much better when they make the shakespeare plays into movies with tanks and special effects, like richard III.

zman said...

Looks like I missed a few comments. When did Marls get another cat and why did he name it after a dump in Queens (as opposed to, say, Freshkills)? Reich is quite strong. Kemba Shabazz is a no-brainer but I won't be able to sneak it past zwoman.

rob said...

i would like ron burgundy to go the fuck away

Mark said...

Rob, TR and Zman have all exclaimed their distaste for Ron Burgundy is the second go round. Way to take a stand fellas. Definitely nobody else on the Internet taking your stance.

mr kq said...

There once was a man named McNamiter,
With a tool of prodigious diameter,
But it wasn't the size,
That opened girls eyes, 'Twas his beat iambic pentameter.

rob said...

jags! texans! what's the opposite of an exclamation point?

zman said...

I haven't seen Anchorman but it's clear that Ron Burgundy is supposed to be a buffoon, and I'm not interested in buying a car because a buffoon suggests that I do so. It's like using Mr. Magoo to sell glasses or Buck to sell prophylactics.

Greg said...

Iambic Pentameter is for pussies!!! Dactylic Hexameter is the way forward. Go Spondees!!!

Mark said...

Anchorman is funny. Just waaaaay overdone at this point. I saw the first in the theater. Ill wait on this one.

zman said...

zwoman got a goldfish for zson. He named it Firetruck. He will have no input on zdaughter's name.

Danimal said...

you can't re-make The Sound of Music! c'mon man.

on anchorman - it's funny, to me anyway. Will Ferrell is a funny man, and so is ron burgundy, to me anyway. if the twitterverse wasn't constantly bemoaning the over exposure, i wouldn't consider it as over exposure. and after considering it, i don't. dodge Durango commercials and espn interview clips - 2 total, are what I've seen. there's obviously a lot more out there b/c people are riled up. it's funny. i find it funny. give me MORE ron burgundy!

Danimal said...

i did read a quick one that the movie moguls didn't want to make anchorman 2 and that will and a couple of others fought a little extra for it. this campaign was probably a trade. ironic that it could have the opposite effect.

rootsminer said...

My wife got invited by a nice wholesome neighbor lady to get together for Carrie Underwood's Sound of Music, but she thought they were just going to be listening to a CD. She was less than thrilled when I told her what she has in store for the evening.

On another note Z, she was named by her three year old brother, so maybe Zson will come up with a good suggestion before Zsister arrives.

Shlara said...

Um....Amsterdam is getting creative...

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/12/05/world/europe/amsterdam-has-a-deal-for-alcoholics-work-paid-in-beer.html?pagewanted=1&nl=todaysheadlines&emc=edit_th_20131205

Mark said...

Zson is a far more creative name giver than my stepdaughter was at that age. Or even up until a couple of years ago.

I've thought more about the Zdaughter name. I say you pick something that allows for a nickname like Bronsolino or Action.

Mark said...

My daughter's name isn't very nickname friendly but luckily she has a little patch of white hair in the back of her head so I call her Sheed.

zman said...

I ran this post by zwoman and Daenerys is a serious contender for a middle name. I might have to wield my zveto on that.

Mark said...

That name is fresh. Damn you.

Dave said...

hey gheorghies!

hey gheorghies zdaughter.