(TR Interlude (Introlude?): No Eight is Enough Reference Can Be Made Without a Photo of Willie Aames and his hair. I've fist-fought over this belief in the past and will do so again on a moment's notice. The picks can be a "Page Down" click away. I don't care. And fantastically enough, a Willie Aames label has already been used on this blog. Good job, guys.)
It only took 7 weeks but Danimal finally did it…He beat Mark! Bad News (Hughes), Danimal is still 5 games back on the year. Is this where he REALLY makes his move?
FSU -3 at Clemson
Ummm…yeah, I don’t think so. FSU walloped Maryland last week 63-0. Is that what this line is based on? Of course it isn’t. The makers of lines, lines makers if you will, are way smarter than that. They must know something we mortals don’t to have the Seminoles favored by 3 going into the stadium otherwise known as Death Valley occupied by a Clemson team that is undefeated AND who have undeniably had a tougher road to 6-0. Clemson played poorly last week against a totally (dude) inferior BC team. So what. Who cares? Show me a team that has yet to play a bad game and I’ll show you Oregon. But that’s it. Clemson should be will be is was highly annoyed with the dis. Eff them say the Tigers and Hear us ROAR! Go Tigers!
Texas Tech -5 at WVU
Oh boy. Am I going against my pal’s wishes who implored me to “stay away from the Mounties” after beating a then top-10 ranked Oklahoma State in week 4? You bet your sweet ass I am. You know who I’m talkin’ to. There are a couple of key reasons I’m going with the TeeTees here…1) they’re the TeeTees; 2) they have 3rd best passing offense in the America, fuck yeah; 3) 14th in Scoring; 4) 15th in overall defense; and 5) the opening line on this game was TT -9.5. I feel this is a bargain I just cannot pass up people. Oh, and 6) I told you I only had a “couple” of reasons but I spewed out 5!
Show me the TEETEEES!!!!
Purdue +27 at Mich St
Betting for such a shite team is never, ever a good idea unless they’re trending upward in some shape or form. And trending upward Purdue is not. Buuuut, 27 seems a tad bit on the high side for me. Michigan State isn’t exactly a powerhouse. They scored 55 against Youngstown St & 42 against the Hoosyourdaddies? Other than that it’s been pretty ho-hum. But then I look at Purdue’s accomplishments. They are absolutely terrible. I’m embarrassed for the Irish by only beating them by 7. That my friends, is a terrible joke. I honestly came in here with intent of betting on PeeeYOU! but that says it all.
Here we go Sparty Here we go!
I'm coming off two straight losing weeks here at Gheorghe: The Blog (I broke even last week thanks to a late decision to take Boise State after I realized Utah State QB Chuckie Keeton was out for the year. Yay for degenerate gambler type knowledge!) and Danimal is starting to creep on me. I'm going to blame last week on the distraction of my Baton Rouge/New Orleans trip which may or may not have resulted in me quickly making my picks while stoned and waiting for my plane in the beautiful Melbourne airport. This week though I'm stuck at home while my wife parties in Mexico at a Jewish Wedding. That's right, two Jews getting married in Mexico. The 21st Century is awesome, y'all.
Washington State @ Oregon (-39.5)
I fucked up last week. After riding Oregon regardless of the point spread all year I got spooked by Washington's performance against Stanford and chose not to give the 14 points to the Huskies. As you all know by now, I'm dumb. As we learned from Stanford's loss to Utah, the Stanford-Washington game was more about Stanford than Washington, though the Huskies are still strong to quite strong. Anywho, I'm sorry Oregon. I'm sorry I didn't believe in you. Please take me back. I'll never hurt you and your ridiculous uniforms again. DUCKS.
(Note: A video of Tim Meadows as Ike Turner was supposed to be in this spot but NBC thinks we don't deserve that. Why do you want to hurt us, NBC?)
South Carolina (-7.5) @ Tennessee
The Volunteers have tripped me up once already this season but that was more about Georgia's offensive injuries than Tennesee being any good. South Carolina hammered Arkansas last weekend and I think they've started to find their legs after a September filled with some weird out of conference games, trumped up controversies and QB injuries. The Gamecocks are just too talented for Tennessee. South Carolina pulls away in the second half and wins by two TDs.
Arkansas @ Alabama (-29)
Despite being a CFB dynasty, it's risky laying a lot of points with Alabama. Their style of play often lends to easy wins that don't cover the massive point spreads set by Vegas. I'd imagine that is what many people think when they see this line. Not me. This is the most explosive Alabama offense that Nick Saban's ever had in Tuscaloosa and Arkansas has been exposed the past two weeks. After looking semi-competent early in the year, the Razorbacks have fallen apart against two good SEC defenses in Florida and South Carolina. Arkansas has scored 17 points combined against those two teams and they rank 113th in the nation in passing. You're not going to rush for a ton of yards against a Nick Saban coached Alabama team. Like, ever. This is going to get ugly. Roll Tide. Speaking of the Tide. Have you met Phyllis? She seems lovely.