Thursday, June 06, 2013

I bet rob could've lived here for 4 more years

Tiny Dictator demanded some filler while he is attending a middle school graduation for one of his daughters (non-parent question: is there a graduation after EVERY grade in middle school?). He left this rather interesting link in drafts, and since I am a lazy second banana, we're just going to run with it.

Apparently some "artists" in providence, RI not only built a secret apartment in a mall, but lived there for the last four years.
The apartment had no running water (they used mall bathrooms), but it did include “a sectional sofa and love seat, coffee and breakfast tables, chairs, lamps, rugs, paintings, a hutch filled with china, a waffle iron, TV and Sony Playstation 2,” according to the Boston Globe.
I think this is supposed to be what the "secret" apartment looked like. Hard to say, given the Zapruder-esque quality of this image.

Pretty cool, I guess. I mean, it's not the real-life visualization of Geico's "Tiny House" that I have been wanting for years, but this'll do.

Also, Providence Paul Blart, your detective skills are an insult to Lenny Briscoe.

55 comments:

zman said...

They should get Tom Hanks to star in a movie based on this story.

T.J. said...

I'm sure the NSA knew of this place before the mall.

Danimal said...

have been meaning to ask about the graduations...attended my first two nights ago, a pre-K grad ceremony, held at 7pm (ok unless you have 2 other young'ns) that lasted 90 min. wedding. tango. foxtrot. when did this shit start? what year? clarence? i think it's ridiculous. told my wife that's the last one we go to.

also - if you haven't read the wright thompson's latest piece in grantland, do so. especially for you soccer peeps.

T.J. said...

also be sure to read Drew Magary's GQ piece on the Kid Rock Cruise

it. is. phenomenal.

TR said...

I caught shit from the wife for bailing on my son's Pre-K graduation, held at the convenient time of 10:30 AM on a Tuesday in a town where most dads commute to NYC for work.

She bought him balloons that said "Congrats, Grad!" He promptly bit a hole in it to suck in helium so he could make his voice sound funny. His Dad taught him that trick.

My town has a K-3 school, a 4th-5th school, a middle school and a high school. Plenty of time left to pretend I care. I don't think I need to start escrowing cash for his therapy for me missing that "ceremony".

Danimal said...

i 2nd the kid rock cruise article. oh my. there should be a gtb cruise. it could take place on the staten island ferry. or one of those dc dinner cruise ships. ya know, until readership gets up to a few hundred.

T.J. said...

GHEORGHEFEST 2: CRUISE CONTROL

T.J. said...

rob, Trombone Shorty played on the Kid Rock cruise. thought you'd like to know.

rob said...

this 'graduation' shit is a scam. and since my 11 year-old is constitutionally incapable of sitting still and not making faces at every single word said by a speaker, her front-row positioning was especially enjoyable. at one point, she flashed gang signs to a kid across the room. good times.

rob said...

van buren boys, i assume.

zman said...

Gang signs in Leesburg. Who knew?

T.J. said...

MS-13, z

Danimal said...

did your 11-year old have a pre-K grad ceremony? i want answers!

rob said...

probably, but i certainly wasn't there. both girls definitely had kindergarten 'graduations'.

T.J. said...

The Nuggets just let George Karl go? WTF is happening in Denver?

Mark said...

I second both article recommendations. Italians might actually be worse than rednecks.

Fuck all this graduation shit. You didn't flunk out if preschool, grade school or middle school? Yay for you. You're not amongst the dumbest 1% of kids in the country.

I do enjoy how much of a G Rob's daughter is though.

Danimal said...

nuggets personnel high on cannabis, fire karl, laugh, and convey they were just joshin

Mark said...

Nuggets already lost their GM this off season too. A young GM widely regarded as one the league's best. Nice little summer they're having in Denver.

By the way, I'd be cool if this rain could give it a rest for a while. No? Oh, okay. That's cool too.

zman said...

Is it ok to talk on your cell phone on the toilet in the men's room at work? Because some guy was having a loud, protracted conversation (with his wife I think) whilst on the throne and it weirded me out.

TR said...

Hardest thing about talking while dropping a deuce is masking splashing sounds and masking exertion noises while speaking.

I say you should be allowed to chat, although public cell phone etiquette should be adhered to. You stick with that, and everything else is cream cheese.

Danimal said...

not a proponent of using the cell phone in a public bathroom to talk to anyone other than buddies, ya know, other people who would only find it amusing that you were doing so. i see/hear guys in airport stalls and even standing at the urinal conducting actual business with toilets flushing every half a second. it's odd to me. but that's just me.

rob said...

man, wright thompson.

Geoff said...

I feel strongly that the stall deuce phone call is not ok. I was on a conference call recently where one of my colleagues had the audacity to flush during a call with about 6 people. It was a loud, unmistakable flush.

I do, however, often continue a call during a trip to the urinal.

T.J. said...

Drebin:

http://cli.ps/HYfm

Danimal said...

Am curious to find out from our female readers if their gender ever does such a thing.

Danimal said...

Stay classy Geoff's colleague. Seems like a potentially a poor career choice.

Shlara said...

No, Zman, It is NOT ok to talk on your cell phone from the bathroom at work. It's also not ok to talk on your phone in a public bathroom. Not OK at home either.

Bottom line = phones of any kind are NOT kosher in bathrooms of any kind.

rootsminer said...

Man, that Kid Rock cruise sounds like an epic goatfuck.

Geoff said...

So if I can't take the phone in the shitter, when am I supposed to play Words with Friends?

Marls said...

So if I'm not Jewish does that mean I can chat in the throne room?

Marls said...

Turds With Friends?

Danimal said...

bm's with bff's

KQ said...

Of course we don't talk on phones in the bathroom. We're too pretty and classy for that. I've heard tell of texting in the potty but I have no comment on that.

Danimal said...

layin' cable w/comrades

Danimal said...

data download w/danimal

T.J. said...

Texts with TP?

Marls said...

Crappin with the Crew

Marls said...

Poopin with peeps.

Mark said...

Shittiest rhombus ever.

Marls said...

Shombus?

Marls said...

Suck a dick bronbon.

Dave said...

hi gheorghies! (weak but i made it out after suffering through a four hour retirement dinner)

rob said...

what did brobron do, mark? obviously, that game ended way after my bedtime.

Mark said...

That was Marls. I hold no ill will for The Bron. He did drop a triple double that included 18 boards. Good thing he hit the glass like that because Chris 'Like a Bosh' is a pussy.

Mark said...

Speaking of hitting the glass, Florida Gov. Rick Scott signed the anti bong bill yesterday. No more glass, plastic or ceramic bongs available for sale in Florida after July 1. Stock up now kids!

rob said...

sorry, mark. all you bald white guys look the same to me

Danimal said...

we have sun here in fla today, that is unless you're a frequent bong buyer. 'tis glorious. sorry for you n.e.'rs...



zman said...

Speaking of bathroom etiquette ... am I weird for using those paper ass gaskets when I use the shitter at work? Going rawdog on a public seat gives me the heebeejeebees. I had a conversation about this with some former colleagues and they think I'm a wimp.

rob said...

you're a wimp. your asshair is a better shield than any tissue.

T.J. said...

science

rob said...

yasiel puig, y'all

Dave said...

zman, you've been in the bathroom after me at tortuga's, and they don't stock those paper seat covers -- and you're still fairly healthy.

zman said...

The Djoker took Rafa to a 5th set. And I am at work. Dagger.

Mark said...

I'm sitting in a drs office that's showing the French Open on a 40 in HDTV. May just sit here in the lobby until this is over. It's that good. And you're a wimp, Z.

T.J. said...

Special Edition of The Ghoogles has just been posted