(Consider this a parallel theme to Rob Lasso. A much cruder and less insightful parallel)
It has been an eventful youth baseball week in my house, so I want to share some highlights. Most folks here know that I coach my younger son's 11U travel baseball team. I love it for many reasons. I love baseball. I enjoy working with good kids. I enjoy the time with my kid. And I enjoy the competition. We have a very strong squad this year, so it's been a blast. We are 10-3 in all competitions. I have been setting things up to give them more competition, and they've risen to the challenge. All good stuff, and will be a genuine bummer to leave this squad when we move.
My younger guy is a complicated kid. He has some natural gifts (coordination, quickness, intensity), but some deficits (size, strength, empathy). We had a couple games this weekend that tested his ability to deal with his strengths and weaknesses. He dealt with the issues in his own way. I'm not sure I love how my kid reacted to the pressure, but I'm not sure I hate it.
He had a rec game on Saturday against a team that was short two players. That team "borrowed" two of our players each inning to have 9 in the field. It's a common league move. My kid played CF against his own team one inning. One of his good friends smoked a liner in the gap. My kid slowly made his way to the ball and then made a feeble throw back in. His friend got a triple. It's what a poor rec player would have done. The other team's coach had a breakdown as a result. He started screaming and yelling about my kid's slow response. He stopped the game and demanded that the guest fielders leave. He said "I don't want them. I'll play with seven."
He ordered the guest fielders off the field, an unprecedented move in rec baseball. As this happened, he started yelling at the ump to disallow a run b/c the guest fielder (my son) didn't give 100%. The ump disagreed and an argument ensued, exactly as my kid started running in from CF. While that lunatic coach was yelling, my kid jogged by him and gave him a thumbs-up from a few feet away, in a sarcastic "you're really cool, asshole" kinda way.
The coach did not like that. I was not there for the game, and I am not sure if I like that move or not. But I am not sure I hate it. I teach my kids to respect authority figures, but asshole rec coaches for other teams are not authority figures. My kid's move apparently irked other kids on that team, who told my kid they would peg him the next time they played. So my kid asked me about charging the mound. I told him not to, b/c I would handle it if he got plunked. Is my kid a dickhead for doing this stuff? Possibly, but we have no fucks to give b/c we are leaving town in two months. Rec baseball!!!
Second story is different, but the same. My travel team played on Sunday. The opposition was generally a nice group, but they had one bad habit that their coaches did not address. Whenever we threw a ball to a base, their whole dugout would yell "BALL BALL BALL BALL BALL" over and over to let their baserunner know our fielder still had the ball, to avoid the hidden ball trick. They did it excessively every time and it was a uniquely annoying experience to hear it.
We only had 9 kids for this game, so my kid played 3B the whole game. The other team was trying to steal a lot, so my kid fielded many throws on steal attempts and also got many pick-off throws his way.
Every time he got a throw and held the ball, the other dugout would start yelling. His response was to drop his mitt and do a second swipe tag on the kid's helmet. Not in a "I'm gonna concuss you" kinda way, but in a "just as a reminder, I'm giving you this shot to the head b/c your dugout is annoying" kinda way. He perfectly rode the line of not tagging too hard to warrant a warning from the ump, but annoying the fuck out of the other team. It was great.
My kid confirmed after the game that the other dugout was annoying, so he consistently gave a mild/medium plunk to the baserunner's head as a way to deal with it. I was fine with it. Annoying opponents suck. Do what you can do.
So maybe my kid is an 11 y/o version of AJ Pierzynski. Or Claude Lemieux. Or Bruce Bowen. Either way, I love him playing with an edge. I wouldn't love anything more, but he hasn't pushed it that far. Yet.
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25 comments:
Being familiar half of his direct genetic lineage, I’m sure he’ll never be the type to take it too far.
TR never took anything over the line.
On zman's Official Scale of Dickishness, which goes from Roger Federer to Kanye West, I rank this story around "Ron Artest pulls Paul Pierce's pants down." Annoying but harmless.
and over-serious dickhead adults deserve a mild bit of disrespect from time to time
I got called a dick this morning for insisting that my son get a final paper to at least a completed draft before going to recreate at his school's lake day this afternoon. He has the dynamite combination of reading disability, attention issues, and anxiety. Couple that with an unwillingness to accept help from parents, and it's not a great situation.
he should meet my 17 year-old. they’d bond quickly over their belief that their parents are useless.
All of this could've been avoided if the guy just showed up with 9 kids like he was expected to do.
That seems like a great situation to simply say, “Hey Fuckface, show up with 9 players and it wouldn’t be a problem.”
On a side note, who puts the loned player in center or ss? Clownshow
Anytime you get to call someone Fuckface is a great situation indeed.
Marls asks a very good question. Park him in RF. Duh. With several good buddies that are bball dads and coaches, the stories are plentiful. A new one every wkd. Keep 'em comin!
Fuckface is nice, but I’m partial to dickhead, a word I loved in both Lethal Weapon 2 and Eastbound and Down. When Kenny Powers said to his girlfriend “honey, I love you, but sometimes you’re a real dickhead,” I died laughing.
I have a million baseball stories. And no fucks to give, now that I know I’m leaving town in 2 mos. Will be fun!
TR's team played my son's rec team last night. Tim's team ran up the score early, in no small part due to my son's weak pitching. The last two innings, we clawed our way back With two outs in the bottom of the last inning, my son was was the winning run at bat. He's a good, reliable hitter so I was excited to see if he could drive some runs in and keep the game alive.
Then the not-so-fast kid at second base decides to steal. The ump calls him out. It could have gone either way. Game over.
I'm not a big baseball fan and I don't usually get worked up at games, but I was really annoyed. I wanted to shout, "That's bullshit, blue! Give the kids a chance to win". Instead I went home and drank two manhattans on an empty stomach.
did tr's son clock the kid in the head with the ball to add insult to injury? sounds like something he'd do.
My younger kid is the dickhead. My older one doesn’t have that edge.
And some more context on that game. There were 2 outs and 2 on and the team was down by 3, w/ the top of the lineup batting. The 3B coach gave the steal signal to two tiny, bad players on 1st/2nd. Stealing 3rd on the big field is no easy feat. And when you’re down 3, you should do nothing to put the game in doubt. Horrendous call by that coach to take the bat out of the tying run’s hand. And generally speaking, rec coaches that use signals are tools (though that guy is actually nice guy), even in the playoffs.
My younger son is the easy one so far. He unfortunately gets into the middle of his brothers parental drama, since he answers our calls. Perhaps he'll learn to avoid us someday.
anyone know anything about umphrey's mcgee? they're playing at red rocks while we're out in colorado next month and i'd love to see a show there.
Rob, don't know a lot about UM. Jam band-ish. Mix in a lot of different styles. Most of their discs are decently reviewed, but they're generally better regarded live than in studio, because of energy and interplay among musicians. Here's a cut from a Red Rocks show, coincidentally:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9B1vJpOn1so
sports don't build character, they reveal it. my younger son-- who is first singles on the high school team-- just lost to a fucking moonball pusher in the states. match is 2-2 and i had to leave. too much stress watching the poor third singles kid battle in the third set. this entire team was trained to be pushers-- they just lob the ball back up the middle every shot. it's annoying but can drive you crazy and actually works as a strategy (although it is roundly despised). i couldn't watch any longer. this team also did quick underhanded second serves. absurd. but they might win. i'll keep you posted.
I’ve seen Umphrey’s McGee twice. They’re fun. I was introduced to them by my friend Lew (https://gheorghe77.blogspot.com/2020/10/worlds-colliding.html), who called them the jam band not for pussies.
okay - that's a pretty decent recommendation. can i borrow lew's badweirdass car?
He bought two when he sold that one, gonna sell one of them. Maybe to you.
MSG- packed and raucous at the current moment. I’m not mad.
jazz court/uni combo is cool
Feliz cumpleanos to Juan Carlos.
Umphrey’s has a classic jam band sound/feel, but I find their sound to be generally accessible, as opposed to Moe, who I don’t really care for at all.
Glory is a fun tune: https://youtu.be/6b_jsx3ZHD4 Not sure if that was the link OBX Dave sent.
In other jam band news. I am on the cusp of leveraging a work trip to Napa into seeing a Panic show out there in late August. Winner winner chicken dinner.
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