Wednesday, May 17, 2017

Joe Montana is Laughing

Leonard Marshall played defensive tackle for the New York Giants for 10 years, and for the Jets and R**skins for one season each. He went to the Pro Bowl twice, he was named NFL Defensive Lineman of the Year twice, he won the Super Bowl twice (including XXV against my beloved Bills), and he almost killed Joe Montana once.



He recorded 83.5 sacks and 711 tackles. It's safe to say that he had a good career in football.

Like many retired professional athletes, Marshall began a career in business after hanging up his cleats. In particular, Marshall became the Director of Strategic Initiatives and Brand Ambassador for ED Healthcare LLC, a pharmaceutical company that specializes in the manufacture of sildenafil (the active ingredient in Viagra) to treat erectile dysfunction. To put it another way, Marshall started selling boner pills. At the price of $4.95 a pill! Through telephonic hotlines! He now lives on Prospect Avenue in Hackensack, NJ.

I know this because Marshall filed a complaint in the Superior Court of New Jersey, Essex County Division, against ED Healthcare alleging that he was fired for telling the CEO that two female employees said they were sexually harassed by one of the EVPs. According to the complaint, the CEO "explicitly stated to [Marshall] that he was terminating [Marshall] because [Marshall] had conveyed the aforesaid sexual harassment complaints to him." Apparently the EVP was particularly terrible to one woman, he allegedly "repeatedly touched her breasts, asked for pictures of her in sleep wear, put his hand up her skirt, and used sexually explicit language ...." This is bad stuff but are we surprised given that this company sells hard-ons? Maybe he was all hopped up on boner pills? Or he was just trying to act presidential?


The plot thickens: "In further retaliation for [Marshall's] protected activity, Defendants cut [Marshall] out of all financial benefits due him from sales of Sildenafil by and on behalf of ED." I bet he isn't the first guy to be cut off due to ED. Marshall also claims that he "suffered and continues to suffer career damage, economic loss, damage to his reputation and emotional distress, as well as physical pain and suffering." I guess selling boner pills didn't damage his reputation? And his 12 year stint in the NFL didn't lead to any physical pain?

In fact, his 12 year stint in the NFL did lead to physical pain as Marshall described in this interview where he advocates for legalizing marijuana. Actually that's not 100% accurate--Marshall advocated for legalizing cannabidiol, a marijuana extract sold by ... wait for it ... a company owned by the CEO of ED Healthcare! It all comes full circle (or maybe it doesn't if you've been cut off from your sildenafil supply).


I suspect that all this and more will come up in Marshall's deposition, and it won't go smoothly. I'll update you as the case firms up.

28 comments:

Whitney said...

Leonard better stock up on those doobie extracts before Jeff "Binger" Sessions brings the hammer down.

Was wondering what Zman's depth of legal knowledge on impeachment law and related matters is bwhen I read this: http://thehill.com/blogs/pundits-blog/the-administration/333764-opinion-the-comey-memo-offers-zero-proof-to-impeach

zman said...

This post is really an overly long way of saying that the complain is not particularly well-pled.

I know nothing about impeachment law but I'm very much in favor of applying it to the current President.

TR said...

Walked on to my flight to Boston, then the whole plane was forced to get off. Now delayed indefinitely. I tried to get cute and save an hour off the time for the train. Shame on me.

Dave said...

but marshall is claiming that he was chivalrous, yes? that's got to count for something . . .

Dave said...

i thought TR's post said "delayed infinitely."

TR said...

Feels like infinitely. The forced, "mid-Group 2" deboarding disrupted the fragile balance in the always packed Group 2. So the ones who lined up early had to either cut those who hadn't boarded, or head to the back and risk not having a spot to stow their carry-on. Lots of glaring and unspoken animosity. United rules.

zman said...

Infinite jest? Acela is the way to go to Boston if you're leaving from the Newark area. Just sayin.

Whitney said...


This mash-up makes me smile. Dig it.

TR said...

I did not know until today that Alexandra Daddario was in the new Baywatch. Her in a bathing suit for 90 minutes is a good thing.

zman said...

True Detective season 1 episode 2 changed my life.

rob said...

pour out a little for chris cornell, the greatest voice in rock history

Whitney said...

Wow. Didn't see that coming. What a voice. Sucks.

Whitney said...

TR's buddy leaving SNL. Onward and upward, I guess.

Whitney said...

President Trump lashed out after the naming of a special counsel: The "greatest witch hunt of a politician in American history!"

If Trump has any hope of avoiding the same fate of Richard Nixon, he needs to stop mimicking Nixon's every move in 1973/4. He's stride for stride with Tricky Dick.

rob said...

pour out some vitriol for roger ailes, also dead this day. there's a special place in hell for that bastard. a place where nobody can hear chris cornell's heavenly voice.

zman said...

Trump can't spell counsel. Or council. I'm not sure which he was going for.

I will miss Chris Cornell, one of the all-time most instantly recognizable voices with the likes of James Earl Jones and Chuck D.

Whitney said...

And Ad-Rock, Morgan Freeman, Jimmy Stewart, and Fran Drescher.

Whitney said...

Oh, and Vincent Price, the ac-tor.

Whitney said...

Cornell an apparent suicide. Sucks worse.

zman said...

And Elmer Fudd.

rob said...

some hump voted lebron 2nd-team all-nba. what kind of douchery is this?

Dave said...

i'm usually unmoved by celebrity deaths-- who cares?-- but chris cornell . . . that's sad. he was grunge when it just meant being dirty looking. i saw them with circus of power in asbury park in the late 80s . . . i couldn't hear for days afterward. that's probably the death of our generation right there.

a cheerful masterpiece over at Sentence of Dave today, though

TR said...

Blessed be the fruit

zman said...

Under his eye.

zman said...

Or was that another Alexandra Daddario reference?

TR said...

That would be "Blessed be The Cans"

Dave said...

hello gheorghies--

magic mike impersonations all night from this guy. not sure how everyone took it, but there were definitely a lot of lawbreakers up in this here house

zman said...

That's not the image I wanted to conjure up at this time of night.