The Worst Person In the World

Last Wednesday, our own tiny dictator reached out to the twitterverse to inquire about the following:

1. Feb 13@batogato ‏@batogato

   is there a worse person in the world than the guy who farts on a crowded train?

This was no doubt related to his own gastrointestinal reaction to several days of dining on work conference food, Big Gay Ice Cream, & multiple Dogfish 90 Minute Imperial IPA's on the train from New York to Washington DC. 

At the time, I was tempted to give Rob some solace by advising him to "let em' rip" because the guy who farts on a plane is much worse than the railway cheese cutter.  At least on Amtrak if you are overwhelmed by your co-passenger's flatulence you can get up and move to another car, maybe even settle into one of those comfy molded plastic seats in the cafe car - which is almost like being in a Parisian cafe, but without the smoking, haughty service, and any ambiance at all.

Anyway, after reading today's NY Daily News, I realize that I was mistaken.   Apparently, scientists are now advocating breaking wind at altitude.  Research published in the New Zealand Medical Journal states that while flying, 

"(Holding back) holds significant drawbacks for the individual, such as discomfort and even pain, bloating, dyspepsia (indigestion), pyrosis (heartburn) just to name but a few resulting abdominal symptoms."

To me, these sound like the normal symptoms of holding in farts, but who am I to argue with science?

Interestingly, the study also claims that women's farts smell worse than men's.  This finding is vehemently denied by my wife.  However, that may be due to the particular odoriferous emanations of the Marls' household.  

Finally, for those of you unaware of the pleasures of the D90MIIPA, I have included a video review, which also might be a first ballot inductee into the Stoned YouTubeing HOF. (To be fair, they may just be shitfaced)