Monday, August 06, 2012

Seven Minutes of Terror

From the mind of Marls:

With all due respect to our Olympians, this week’s most impressive performance by the United States may be taking place over 36 million miles away. By the time you read this we will have either taken a huge step forward in an effort to advance our understanding of the cosmos or we will have crashed $2.5 billion worth of space junk into Mars.

While I understand that G:TB’s staff usually limits their science discussions to Rob’s musings on the Large Hadron Collider, I thought that audacity of NASA’s Curiosity Lander deserved a post of its own.

Back in November of last year, NASA launched the Mars Science Laboratory spacecraft with the intent of landing a golf cart sized Curiosity lander on Mars. The size of this latest Mars lander created some enormous challenges with regard to landing it safely on the planet surface. Namely, how the hell do you stop the f’ing thing? At about 1:25 EDT on August 6th, the spacecraft traveling at 13,000 miles per hour starts its decent into the Martian atmosphere and begins what NASA rather theatrically calls “7 Minutes of Terror”. I thought that might be hyperbole until I watched this video.



For those of you too lazy to watch the video, essentially it details (using some groovy movie trailer music) the six stages required to land this sucker, including a heat shield, supersonic parachute, rockets, and a “skycrane”. All of this will be done without assist from mission control, which gets information from the craft on a 14 minute delay meaning the lander’s fate will be sealed 7 minutes before anybody could do anything about it.

The scientists in the video seem really sure that this is going to work. I have to admit, I’m not nearly as confident in the ability for this seemingly MacGyverized plan. That being said, good luck smart chicks and dudes, make us all proud. Just please don’t wear lime green high-tops and a diamond encrusted grill to the presser.

48 comments:

Marls said...

Don't bet against NASA. The trafic light in front of my apartment has been broken for 2 days, but somehow a governmental agency pulled this thing off.

That is unless you belive the conspiracy theorists who will tell you that this whole thing is being filmed on a set in Culver City, CA in an effort to distract Americans form the fact that BO was not born in the US. Sadly, I can see Trump et al. claiming this.

zman said...

That's funny, I thought a "from the mind of Marls" piece would read "metsmetsmetsmets booze metsmetsmets hauntthehouse metsmetsmets."

Marls said...

ZMan, you forgot "PUSC"

mayhugh said...

I have confidence that the golf cart will land safely on Mars, only to tip over after traveling less than 50 feet.

Marls said...

Thankfully, they gave this thing 6 wheels instead of using the Caddyshack era 3 wheel EZ-GO design as originally planned.

zman said...

So long as it doesn't land on Marls.

Squeaky said...

I thought the 'Seven minutes of terror' included deep knee bends, some doctoring and pink floyd.

Danimal said...

7 minutes of terror reminds my wife of our third child's conception.

rob said...

braggart

rob said...

my daughter just drank a large mountain dew and ate a giant piece of chocolate cake. this afternoon ought to be interesting.

Squeaky said...

Awesome, Rob. Can't wait for the second installment of G:TB Parenting Chronicles.

Also the Mars Reconnaissance Orbiter got a snap shot of the landing. They are really trying to push this 'real' landing.

http://goo.gl/r1YGf

Marls said...

Daddy's great.... He gives us chocolate cake....

Marls said...

Rapinoe!!

rob said...

i feel about megan rapinoe like shlara does jay wright, danny ferry, adam scott or one of her various other boy toys.

rob said...

this us/canada women's game is absurd.

Marls said...

Unfortunately for you Rob, last month Megan announced officially that she likes the ladies. However, her twin sister might still be available.

Marls said...

So close to two hat tricks in the same game. Fun stuff.

Wambach!!!

Marls said...

Somewhere, Brandi Chastain is laughing.

T.J. said...

did we just lose to f'ing Canada?

Danimal said...

are you serious clarke?

hope solo, meet karma.

(saw zero min of game but assuming she was the starting gtender)

Marls said...

Headed to overtime. The us defense has looked terrible. Solo defended Buehler on twitter last week and just had to save her ass on the field.

rob said...

you're a damn liar, marls.

Marls said...

Sorry Rob. It was apparently in the July issue of Out magazine. I guess your subscription ran out?

rob said...

hope solo seems like more sizzle than steak, no?

rob said...

well that's a pisser, marls.

but alex morgan isn't.

Marls said...

America....F Yeah!!

T.J. said...

Alan Thicke is gonna be bummed.

rob said...

w&m women's soccer picked to win the caa. 'cause i know you were wondering.

rob said...

kyle whelliston runs the @swifterhigher twitter feed. think i can get him to ban me?

Danimal said...

Tom Hammond, perhaps the best gig in his business--the Olympics and Notre Dame football.

Squeaky said...

So I know the olympics are going on right now, among other things and your thinking why would I want to click another stupid Squeaky link but if you use google, apple, amazon or anything 'cloud' based read this article, it could prevent you from a world of hurt.

http://goo.gl/4Oujv

Now back to your regularly scheduled programming.

Mark said...

I think best gig in the business is a little strong.

TR said...

When did Picabo Street turn 55 years old? Even Paul Hogan thinks she's wrinkly.

Clarence said...

Ah, Picabo Street, otherwise known as Times Square in TR's world.

Dave said...

east brunswick alumni heather o'reilly provided the winning assist in the usa/ canada game.

rob said...

it's timely news like this that keeps our pagecount numbers high

Jerry said...

I'm pretty sure I refereed one of her games when she was a kid.

Clarence said...

Dave, did you coach her?

zman said...

I'm allegedly on vacation but I've had to work Sunday, Monday, and today. Can someone explain how to take vacation and stay on vacation for the duration of the vacation?

rob said...

stony brook and albany joining the caa for football. be still my heart.

T.J. said...

Wait...what? SUNY Albany is now in the CAA? Road trip to sm-Albany, boys?

Dave said...

zman . . . teach! i'm like school in the summertime, no class.

TR said...

Are you all enjoying the sappy Al Trautwig doing the gymnastics? Dude is a mega-douche sycophant for fat Jimmy Dolan and the Knicks.

TR said...

Not gonna lie. Romanian gymnast Catalina Ponor is the sexiest gymnast I've seen in a while. And she's 24, so I'm not a pervert. Well, I am, but not for that reason.

Shlara said...

Zman--for your vacation, go to a place that has crappy internet and cell phone service

TR--Trautwig is driving me nuts tonight. Tim and Elsie aren't much better either.

Squeaky said...

Sharla, Zman was at our casa Saturday, Sunday and Monday. So shitty cell coverage was definitely in play. Maybe I should have not given him the wireless password. But he is a glutton for punishment.

Danimal said...

http://tinyurl.com/c7yg6qd

some filler for ya...heard about his yesterday but never had a chance to watch it. what the feck?

i think a triple lindy would have salvaged a medal for him

T.J. said...

New, non-Feck filler is up.