THE GOODThe Detroit Tigers - Do you realize these guys are now 27 games over .500? They lead baseball with 52 wins already...three years ago they won a TOTAL of 43 games. They're the best road team in the majors. They havethe best ERA in the AL by over half a run. The Tigers staff has a league-leading 9 shutouts already. The Tigers?? Fucking incredible. They have a chain-smoking curmudgeon for a manager, a 1B who looks partially retarded, three OFs who could be the exact same guy as far as I'm concerned, a gay catcher and a rookie in the bullpen who throws 100 mph (with ease). How can you not root for these guys?
The New York Mets - I can't point out the best story in the AL without tipping my cap to the best team in the NL (by far). There is not much more I can write that Jerry or Whit haven't touched on so far this year, but let me just say that watching Jose Reyes run the bases almost seems like a once in a generation thing. He moves with Speedy Gonzalez ease around the bases, and it doesn't hurt that the kid's hitting .500 over the last two weeks. I am also ecstatic that someone, finally, is pummeling the Braves into submission in the NL East. The '94 Expos tip their caps to the '06 Mets.
The Kansas City Royals(?) - Yep, it's time I cut them some slack. When you suck this bad (I mean, Doug Mientkiewicz occasionally hits clean up for these guys) and can still win 6 out of 7 and 8 out of 11, I will stop referring to you as the Kansas City Poop. Plus, their dismantling of the Pirates last week means that despite the Royals still having the worst record in baseball (24-50), the Pirates (26-51) are actually a worse team. Get over it Pittsburgh - you at least have the All Star game this year. You don't give up 31 runs to the Royals over 3 games and pretend to be better than KC.
THE BAD
The Pittsburgh Pirates - I think we just covered these donkeys. Second worst team ERA in the NL and highest batting average against. I could've easily told you that as I've had not one, not two, but three Pittsburgh starters on my NL-only fantasy team (Ian Snell, Oliver Perez, Paul Maholm). Is there any doubt why I am in dead last, 40 points behind the league leader? The only thing Pittsburgh has going for it is Jason Bay, and with their luck, he'll get knocked unconscious by a foul ball during BP one of these days.
The St. Louis Cardinals pitching staff - Wow, for a team ten games above .500, this is one terrible collection of arms (can they really be the 2nd best team in the NL?). The Cards have lost 7 straight games and have been outscored 65-28 during that span. Jason Marquis, way to single-handedly destroy my fantasy teams ERA and WHIP in your last two starts (of course he joins the Pittsburgh triumvirate mentioned above, making this the worst rotation in the history of fantasy baseball). Mark Mulder at least gets a breather by going on the DL. Their closer, Jason Isringhausen, is contractually obligated to walk two hitters every appearance. I mean, Sidney Ponson is still making starts for St. Louis...Sidney Ponson.
Jay Mariotti, Ozzie Guillen, Barry Bonds, John Rocker - I don't like even mentioning these clowns...can we get them off the damn sports pages please? Go take a long walk off a short pier fellas. No one gives a shit.
AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST...DANNY UGGLA
He of course would be the Florida Marlins rookie 2B and a huge favorite of TJ/Dennis/Jerry. Sure, maybe we only liked him at first because of the funny name (well, at least I did), but now we love him because the kid's damn good. He's a tad banged up right now, but should have his .313 avg (good for 9th best in the NL) back in the lineup any day now. Danny leads all NL 2B in batting average, slugging percentage and OPS. He's second in HRs and RBI. Pretty damn impressive for a 26 year old rookie who toiled in the minors for the last 5 years, if you ask me. Of course, the general public doesn't have a clue who he is (the fact he plays in front of 7,000 a night can't help), given he can't even crack the top 5 in All-Star voting. Why don't we try to help the guy out and get him to Pittsburgh for the big game...vote early and vote often people.
Posts
5 comments:
And yes, David Ortiz certainly should be in the good column...but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Why anyone ever pitches to that guy with the game on the line is beyond me.
here's a true test of the power of gheorghe. if we can get uggla into the all-star game, we can do anything.
Not gonna happen. Cabrera and maybe Dontrelle will wedge him out, unfortunately for Gheorghe.
Get well soon Peter Gammons.
The Cardinals aren't even close to being the NL's second best team (records be damned). I've maintained that they would miss the playoffs since I saw So Taguchi, Larry Bigbie and Sidney Ponson in the starting lineup during a late March spring game.
It shouldn't be a surprise really. The offense has gone steadily down hill over the last three years and now the starting staff is actually worse than the piss poor bullpen that Tony and Walt have cobbled together. That sound you hear is the Cards' window closing.
Post a Comment