Friday, November 18, 2022

How Fucking Dare They

First, they came with their pedophilia nonsense, and we said nothing, because we don't play much ping pong. Then they said we were Satanic, and we said nothing, because they were fucking morons led by morons like Mike Flynn. Then they went after the Jews and the LBGTQ community, and we said nothing, because, again, morons.

But now the con has come into our neighborhood, and we will not stand for it.

I am, of course, referring to the batshit cabal of easily-conned conspiracy sheep being guided by shameless grifters and faux-Christian true "believers" known as QAnon. For a long time, I've mostly pitied them, though I do save a special disdain for prominent people like Flynn, Marjorie Taylor Greene, Lara Logan and That Fucking Guy who absolutely know better but fan the flames out of self-interest in political and personal gain.

Pity has turned to rage. These motherfuckers ruin everything.

A little backstory is in order. Back when G:TB was but a glimmer in my eye, several of us published a few issues of Gheorghe: The Magazine on the nascent interwebs. The content itself is lost to time, though I recall an article about my cat, and maybe a short story, in addition to some sports stuff. Dipshittery, in other words.

G:TM was inspired, at least in name, by the short-lived but influential George, published by the late John F. Kennedy, Jr. in the mid-90s. And now the QAnon freaks have come for its nhamesake.

Recall, if you will, that of the manifold tenets held to be true by the Qfolk is that John F. Kennedy Jr. faked his own death in 1999 and is waiting patiently to return to team up with Donald Trump to smite the liberal pedophile cabal. It stands to follow, then, that he'll bring with him his late, lamented magazine as the tribune of the people.

Gene Ho is a former professional photographer, failed candidate for mayor of Myrtle Beach, and Trump acolyte (and by association and fact, a grifter). He's also the "editor in chief" of a revived George. Setting aside the fact that it's not clear whether he owns the intellectual property associated with the brand, and setting even further to the back the ocean-sized gap between George 1.0's blend of liberally whimsical, societally elite political bent and the new version's mix of conspiracy theories and whackadoodle logic, [I have no idea where I was going with this sentence, but I'm reading Salman Rushdie's Midnight's Children so I'm borrowing from the author's use of interregnum to talk to the reader while I find my way back to the point...] it's just pathetic from a purely aesthetic perspective.

I mean, look at this dreck:


As compared to the original:


Ho kept the font, replaced real writers and topics with QAnonsense, and hit the circuit. Late last month, he hawked his shit (for real - there's merch) at disgraced former general Flynn's ReAwaken America tour stops. Mother Jones was all over it.

I've instructed our crack in-house counsel team to draft a sternly-worded letter to Mr. Ho insisting that he cease and desist using the idea of a person's name as the title of an internet magazine/blog. I've also told our lawyers to make sure they insert certain code words designed to inflame the passions of the QAdorks, so that we can send them down another rabbit warren. I'm expecting a draft by the close of business, and I'll share it upon receipt.

Until then, stay vigilant, assembled Gheorghies. We must fight grifting loons with all the dipshittery at our disposal.

6 comments:

rootsminer said...

I'm glad Rob could come up with words about this, because I have none.

zman said...

The trademark for George the magazine is no longer active because it's no longer used in commerce (the magazine is kaput). There is an application for GEORGE MAGAZINE from 9/22/21 but it hasn't been allowed to register yet. GHEORGHE is available if anyone wants to file for it. I'm not sure "dipshittery" has a code in the Trademark Classification System but we can find a way to make it work.

Whitney said...

Is this the first instance of the word at GTB?

https://gheorghe77.blogspot.com/2009/11/salute.html?m=0

Marls said...

Chester Moistmuffins!

rob said...

tribe football! tribe men’s hoops! tribe swimming! sorry, mark.

Whitney said...

Gamecocks! Let’s go!