GheorgheStarter

If you've paid close attention here over the past ten years or so, or if you've ever listened to me and Whitney yammer on over a few drinks, you're aware that one of our mutual life goals is to stumble upon a stupid amount of money and buy a compound for our homies and their loved ones. We'd while away our time in pursuit of pointless yet life-affirming joys.

Gheorghe: The Compound

At various times, we've decided we'd locate the compound on Cape Cod, or in Williamsburg, or on the Outer Banks. We're not generally picky, though it does seem that we've got a bit of an East Coast bias.

We were wrong, as it turns out. Our search is over. For the location of the compound, anyway. The money part is still a bit elusive. And that's where you come in.

On May 12, Cal Ripken's Reisterstown, MD estate goes up for auction, to be sold to the highest bidder. The kicker, in the sense that it matters to us, is that there's no reserve. Says so in big bold letters on the auction house's website.

The 25-acre property features a 21,900 square foot home with six bedrooms, 10 full baths, and five half-baths, a media room, an eight-car garage, and a pool with poolhouse. Way more importantly to this audience, it also features Cal's legendary 7,000 square foot gym, with a full basketball court, batting cages, enough fitness equipment to keep us all in fine fettle, and a 300-gallon steel tub from Baltimore's old Memorial Stadium for post-workout soaks. There's also a regulation baseball field, hydroponic heating (don't know what that is), and scenic pond.



Cal originally listed the place for $12.5 million, then dropped it to $9.7m before pulling it off the market. My sources tell me the winning bid will come in somewhere around $6 million large.

I submit to you that such a figure is in our wheelhouse, my friends, especially if we can figure out how to generate some income from the compound. Start hammering out the business plan. I'll make an appointment with the broker, but we're gonna need to figure out which of us looks the most like he/she might be worth enough money to seem legit when we go on the property tour.

And start pulling together your loose change. Our dream has never been closer to reality.