Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Uff Da

Barring some unforeseen act of the Baseball Gods, Adam Dunn will trudge into the offseason as the owner of the single worst offensive season in the history of modern baseball.  Big Donkey inked a four-year, $56 million contract with the White Sox on the strength of seven consecutive seasons of more than 38 homers.

Suffice it to say that he won't reach that number this year.  Dunn had never slugged lower than .454 entering 2011, carrying a better-than .500 mark into the season.  His worst OBP in his 10 previous major league seasons was .354.  In 2011, he's dropped an inexplicable .161/.292/.285(!) in 113 games, recording the worst Wins Above Replacement (WAR) measurement of the 443 players with more than 100 plate appearances.

And it says here that while Dunn was clearly the league's worst player, he wasn't its most disappointing.

The Twins ponied up $184 million over eight years to keep local hero and all-around good guy Joe Mauer at home.  Very quietly, the uff das have been mounting, as Mauer will finish the season having played 82 games, hitting 3 homers and driving in 30.  His slash lines of .287/.360/.368 are decent enough for a catcher, but only if that catcher's name is Jarrod Saltalamacchia (whose .759 OPS tops Mauer's for the bargain 2011 price of $750,000).  Mauer's 1.7 WAR ranks him just below the exceedingly average (and heretofore unknown to me) Ryan Hanigan.

The fine people of the Twin Cities are far too nice to say this out loud, but I'd bet dollars to lutefisk-flavored donuts that they're worried that Mauer will never regain the form he displayed in 2009.  And nobody writes that kind of ending to this story.     

22 comments:

Marls said...

Rob: May I please direct you to Bobby Bonilla's 1999 NYM campaign.

http://tinyurl.com/BonillaSucks

.160/.277/.303
4 HR
$5.9M that season

The only reason he does not have the AB's is because he was so bad he was benched.

THe kicker is that the craptastic team the Whit and I root for is still paying this guy 1.25M for each of the next 25 YEARS!!!!

T.J. said...

I will laugh my ass off if Matt Weiters somehow turns out better than Joe Mauer.

TR said...

Thanks for the spotlight on Mauer, my 2nd round fantasy pick (#17 overall). He has helped lead my squad to a vicious dogfight for the 6th overall position in a league of 10 teams.

Thanks also go to Alex Rios, Brad Lidge and Kendry Morales for key supporting roles contributing to my team's performance.

zman said...

I took mauer in the third. He came up huge for my 12th place team (out of 14).

T.J. said...

zman, your boy Zoltan Mesko may be injured/released by the Patriots...

rob said...

why would the patriots injure their punter?

T.J. said...

I thought the Grammar Police Academy had a height requirement?

zman said...

The Bills lead the league in scoring. They are the 1999 Rams all over again.

T.J. said...

I'm on pro-football-reference.com right now...and the Fitzparick '11/Warner '99 seasons could end up being verrrry comparable.

TR said...

Can we at least get to October before we anoint Fitzie?

zman said...

Fitz is the tits. Get on the bandwagon before it runs out of gas against the Pats*.

T.J. said...

TR, now why would we do that?

Signed,
Overreaction Jackson

Whitney said...

Avett Brothers tonight. Wilco Sunday night. Good week.

Anyone in DC going to the Wilco show?

T.J. said...

What is a "wilco"?

Squeaky said...

TJ, this might help answer what a 'wilco' is.

Wilco performing 'Wilco (The Song)'

http://youtu.be/fxe1ZP5fjLg

Geoff said...

TJ, I believe it is an old, old wooden ship.

Whitney said...

Some words with specialized meanings are used in radio communication throughout the English-speaking world, and in international radio communication, where English is the lingua franca.

Affirm — Yes
Negative — No
Reading you Five / Loud and clear — I understand what you say 5x5.
Over — I have finished talking and I am listening for your reply. Short for "Over to you."
Out — I have finished talking to you and do not expect a reply.
Roger — I understand what you just said.
Copy — I heard what you just said.
Wilco — Will comply (after receiving new directions).

Jerry said...

I think it's about time to find the next Wilco.

Danimal said...

Affirm. Roger. Copy. Out.

T.J. said...

TV-related filler coming within the hour...

T.J. said...

New post up...

Mack said...

Is really amazing how much money sports produce, without telling about the laundry of money... a friend in pharmacy escrow knows everything about baseball and also some theories about the corruption in sports.