Thursday, March 23, 2006

You don't know when to keep your mouth shut, do you, Saxxy Boy?

Maybe it's just me, but the state of Florida always seems to have stupid shit happening...

TALLAHASSEE, Fla. -- The state Corrections Department put a former minor league baseball player on the payroll in a no-show job so that he could help prison guards win a softball tournament, investigators say.

The ringer, Mark Guerra, 34, agreed to repay $1,400 and complete 50 hours of community service, state Attorney General Charlie Crist said Wednesday.

Guerra was charged with accepting paychecks for work never done at a prison library. Investigators said he accepted the money to play on the winning team in a tournament held last May by Corrections Secretary Jim Crosby.

Crosby was fired by Gov. Jeb Bush last month.

"It is disturbing that a state agency would place so much importance on a team sport that it would stoop to committing crimes," Crist said.


Apparently, Corrections Secretary Jim Crosby "hired" Guerra to "work" in the prison library after Brooks Hatlen was paroled. Guess it didn't really work out for either guy.

I did a little digging on Mr. Guerra. He was drafted by the Mets in the 40th Round in 1994, making him the 1,100th pick overall (1 spot ahead of David Robinson...no not that David Robinson). He played in the minor league for 10 years and NEVER HAD A HIT. The guy was a pitcher, 59-67 W-L record with a career ERA of 3.69. If you were going to bring in a softball ringer, don't you think a hitter might've been a better option? This seems to be piss poor recruitment by Commissioner Crosby if you ask me.

Well, Mr. Burns had done it,
The power plant had won it,
With Roger Clemens clucking all the while.
Mike Scoscia's tragic illness made us smile,
While Wade Boggs lay unconscious on the barroom tile.
We're talking softball,
From Maine to San Diego.
We're talking softball,
Mattingly and Canseco.
Ken Griffey's grotesquely swollen jaw,
Steve Sax and his run-in with the law,
We're talking Ho-mer,Ozzie, and the Straw!

22 comments:

T.J. said...

"Now, before I post the starting line-up, I want to assure those of you whose names are not on the list...that I'm very disappointed in you."

Geoff said...

Now THAT is a J post.

T.J. said...

"J" is our newest freelance addition here at GTB. He will be phasing Dennis out after Duke's loss to LSU tonight puts Dennis in the clink.

Geoff said...

Damn. I meant TJ. But J will do. Half effort...half name. James posted that one. Soon Thomas will follow up with a cartoon picture, an obscure but slightly selacious sports-related story, and 18 words of commentary.

T.J. said...

Another satisfied customer...

Geoff said...

TJ Fan Club Member #6971, right here.

rob said...

effort-related slags are always better when the words are spelled correctly.

signed,

tj's wife

T.J. said...

robbie, while you're over here, any thoughts on Mason?

Geoff said...

Rod,

I hat yu.

Jeff

rob said...

i think mason/wichita is a coin-flip, and i think the winner is gonna get lambasted by uconn.

jim larranaga's a really good coach, and i don't see mason coming out overconfident because of their earlier win over wsu, or cocky because of their newfound celebrity.

bonus pick - odu will beat michigan in the nit semis, and get whaled by louisville in the final.

jeph is a dink.

Geoff said...

Is that a racial slur? Please advise.

rob said...

yes, lambasted is a racial slur. i'm rabidly anti-wheatshocker.

Geoff said...

Thought so. I contacted the appropriate EEOC official.

Michael Jack said...

I'll take your action on ODU, Rob. name your bet.

rob said...

how many points am i getting?

T.J. said...

Yep, Florida really sucks (sorry Mark)...

Homeowners in an Orange County, Fla., neighborhood claim their community has been overrun by rats big enough to pick fights with small dogs, according to a Local 6 News report.

Residents in the Conway Acres neighborhood in Orange County said the rats are scurrying around their neighborhood 24 hours a day.

Michael Jack said...

the lines haven't come out for that game just yet. but I'll give you the line.

T.J. said...

After fighting through the early rounds, my boys delivered last night - LSU, UCLA and TX give me a solid 3 of 4 on the right side of the bracket. If the Big East represents today I am in solid shape.

By the way, how awesome were those games last night? And Dennis, before you blow a fuse, you might want to ask Coach K why he's running Iso plays for Josh McRoberts with the game on the line.

T.J. said...

That would be left side of the bracket...

rob said...

man, i missed duke's exit by one round. freaking gw.

T.J. said...

Switching topics for a sec, Alfonso Soriano looked like me in the OF yesterday. He needs some tutoring and fast.

T.J. said...

Have fun with this:

http://snakesonaplane.ning.com/index.php