Wednesday, July 20, 2005

"...but it's a dry heat."

Yep, even though it's 113 fucking degrees out, I'm not gonna worry about it, cause it's a "dry" 113 degrees (that phrase might actually top my chart of Worst Ever, if it weren't for "At the end of the day..."). HOWEVAH, the dry heat will not bother me, as I will not leave the hotel for 72 hours (unless being shepherded by Hot Action's Hef into a limo), spending countless hours at the Sports Book (Do they have one? Will I have to tunnel, much like Emi Sok, to freedom?), staring at people playing craps, and sitting in front of seizure-causing slot machines. Vegas baby, Vegas.

Did anybody else love that TV miniseries "V" when they were a kid? Marc Singer was the rebel leader I think. It was followed by the shortlived, but aptly titled, "V" TV show, starring Freddy Krueger and Jester. Good times.

I think the Orioles bullpen coach created the cult/religion Scientology.

In other baseball news, the Yankees are looking to replace poor, decrepit Bernie Williams in CF with...Tike Redman or Endy Chavez. Wow, if those are the options, leave Bernie's corpse out there for the rest of the season.

36 comments:

Geoff said...

Would it have been so hard to give a little background, maybe explaining why and when you are going to Vegas, in order to make this a somewhat "sane" and intelligible post? It would have the distinction of being the first in some time.

I knew you were in trouble when I checked Drudge this morning--no salacious stories for you to cut and paste--it was sure to be a lean day at Gheorghe.

T.J. said...

Good morning Burr...didn't feel like reading about the Mets this morning?

Geoff said...

I enjoyed reading about the Mets. There was a beginning, a middle, and end--even a thesis. It was like an educated adult wrote it and put at least a minimal level of thought into it. Fascinating.

T.J. said...

Why - Our buddy Jamie's bachelor party
When - Tomorrow (returning Sunday)

Chandy, Swint will email you the hotel and his room number later so you can take a puddle-jumper from Cali to the Strip.

T.J. said...

Burr's sad he can't be there.

Jerry said...

Remember in 3rd grade when you had to write a creative story and they gave you those big pieces of paper that were blank at the top (for pictures) and had really wide-ruled lines at the bottom (for writing)?

I'm imagining TJ drafting out this post on one of those.

T.J. said...

You boys know what you're getting when you come here. It's the LITE-BRITE of blogs. Stop your complaining.

Geoff said...

It's just that (when sober) you aren't stupid, so far as I can tell...so I just find it rather vexing that you writings come off like the incoherent babblings of a homeless man.

Jerry said...

I'm not complaining. I'm just making fun of you. It's what I do.

Maybe we should start a fictional blog under psuedonyms and make fun of you through them....

T.J. said...

It's a gift...who wants to have a sexy party?

Geoff said...

Yeah.

Geoff said...

Ah, that's better. A non-sensical mention of a 20 year old network miniseries and a non-sequitor about an unknown pitching coach. Hello Pulitzer.

T.J. said...

I'll try harder for you next time lil' buddy.

Geoff said...

Not for me, TJ. For you...try for you. I promise, if you put just a little effort into it, you will be the one that reaps the rewards of knowing you produced something of value.

Now help me throw this giant ball of oil out the window.

Whitney said...

Hey, we don't need you guys making fun of TJ for his Gheorghe work.

That job is taken.

Jerry said...

I'm trying to take all your jobs....blog-related, of course. I don't think I could handle the drinking that seems to come with your real job.

Geoff said...

It's funny--Whitney made that identical joke a few months back...when he was writing as "Baily Wick."

Look here:

www.forumforem.blogspot.com

Second post down...

What an odd coincidence.

Jerry said...

I've known Geoff for a while, and I'm pretty sure that I've never seen him this relentless about anything ever.

Geoff said...

And when I am finally proven right...oh man...that's gonna be sweet.

And I was pretty relentless about proving that TJ spray-painted the outside of my fratroom door junior year. I conducted an exhaustive investigation. And, as I am sure I will be this time, in the end I was vindicated.

Dennis said...

What's all this Vegas talk? That sounds like a lot of fun. Is there any room on that limo for poor ol' Dennis. The endless days of repression can wear on a guy, you know. No fun at all - work, work, work. And I sure do love that Wayne Newton. Incidentally, I have a customer who's name is Wayne Newton. Kills me everytime. In fact, I have a whole barrell of them that make me laugh for one reason or another - the Government truly is a silly group. For entertainment, I really enjoy sitting in meetings and coming up with the sports likenesses of all the people in the room. It's good times, try it sometime. Makes recounting the event more interesting too - I mean I once had a meeting with Chris Chandler, Jim Edmonds, Melvin Mora, Tom Glavine, and Mr. Sandman from Mike Tyson's punchout.

T.J. said...

Oh man, that was fun, watching you figure that one out...especially since Sisler was in on it...very good times.

rob said...

Doesn't Burr have a Supreme Court nomination to manage? Or at least a Rove investigation to obfuscate?

Geoff said...

Since we've had three cases go to the Supremes in the last 5 years and have lost them by a combined vote of 27-0, we really have nothing to gain here. When you can't even get Scalia on your side, you know your fucked.

Actually I'm about to be quite busy making sure that the flow of "undocumented" workers does not abate, as it would be disastrous for our industry.

Geoff said...

And for the record, the Rove stuff is the same crap as usual. It's this month's BS--see Halliburton, etc.

"Hi. We're the Democrats. We hate Bush."

"That's BS. This is just the liberal media's agenda revealing itself again."

And so on...

Whitney said...

Nice work. Of course, to give credit properly, Matt Groening used it first in a little-known show called The Simpsons. We're actually all three the same guy.

And unfortunately, Burr is right. About the Democrats simply hating Bush without always having a point. Annoying. Took their cue from the Re-Re's (Republicans, NOT retards) in the Clinton years. I can't recall if everything was this acrimonious back in the GHWBush years. I was in college, drinking my mind away and plotting this website fraud (and my animated sitcom).

Geoff said...

Clearly--ClintonCausesCancer.com was a very popular spot in the mid 90s.

And I hate when people root for their political party like it's a sports team. It does, however, serve as a handy intelligence test.

Jerry said...

Klinton vs. Kancer Kharity Klassic?

T.J. said...

Adios Scotty...
James Doohan, the burly chief engineer of the Starship Enterprise in the original "Star Trek" TV series and motion pictures who responded to the command "Beam me up, Scotty," died early Wednesday. He was 85.

Jerry said...

Snotty beamed me last night. It was wonderful.

Jane D. said...

Am I supposed to come to Vegas this weekend?

*****

Oh and Scotty was my favorite.

Geoff said...

The plot thickens...

Dennis said...

Chandypants, I think you have no choice but to go to Vegas this weekend. There'll be an inexplicable force pulling you in - just like one of Scotty's tractor beams. Oh, and you'll probably want to bring one or two of your little friends too . . .

Jane D. said...

Sadly - I am the only of my friends who is unattached...and most of my married friends are not swingers.

I am it boys. And I am pretty sure I am staying home this weekend and starting in on the wine Swint sent me.

Dennis said...

Thanks Swint. No, really, thanks for sending that wine.

rob said...

Swint shared some of his Ripple?

Jane D. said...

It's part of the contract.