Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Cards for Hilarity

Barring some sort of unforeseen inheritance event or lottery fortune, I consider it highly unlikely that I'll ever have fuck you money. I'm okay with this. I'm making a concerted effort to cut back on my 'fuck you' output.

Hantoot, Temkin
If I did somehow fall into that kind of cash, though, I'd really like to believe that I'd use it like Max Temkin and Ben Hantoot are using theirs*.

Hantoot and Temkin are the co-creators of Cards Against Humanity, the very adult-focused 'party game for horrible people'. Each year, they spring for an oddball holiday marketing stunt. Three years ago, for example, they bought an island off the coast of Maine, named it 'Hawaii 2', and gave customers license to visit.

For the 2017 festive season, they've upped the ante, politically, if not financially.

The company has launched a website entitled 'Cards Against Humanity Saves America', which opens with the words, "It’s 2017, and the government is being run by a toilet. We have no choice: Cards Against Humanity is going to save America." And that's just the beginning.

The coup de grace is a bit of cheeky real estate maneuvering targeting the Developer-in-Chief. As the company explains, "Donald Trump is a preposterous golem who is afraid of Mexicans. He is so afraid that he wants to build a twenty-billion dollar wall that everyone knows will accomplish nothing. So we’ve purchased a plot of vacant land on the border and retained a law firm specializing in eminent domain to make it as time-consuming and expensive as possible for the wall to get built."

They know they won't succeed in blocking the wall, but they choose the path of pain in the ass. I think we can all relate to and admire that instinct.

God Bless you, Messrs. Hantoot and Temkin. May your sick senses of humor and willingness to jam a stick in the Man's eye never wane.

* I knew Cards Against Humanity was popular, but I had no idea they were banking fuck you money. Good for those fucking whackdoodles.

35 comments:

Whitney said...

Awesome. My first foray into CAH was a handful of years ago when I ambled into IGORS one Tuesday night after midnight. I guess that makes it Wednesday morning. The entire night was one of the most insane nights I have had in NOLA, which is saying something. Someday when I have FU$ I'll print a recap here.

Danimal said...

Hantoot could pass for Rob kin.

Danimal said...

Correction, it's Temkin. Temkin could pass for Rob kin.

Whitney said...

We used to call him Robkin but he preferred that we refer to him as The Squirrel.

rob said...

all short people with glasses look alike to you, huh, danimal? that's racist.

rob said...

tribe wins! tribe wins!

Mark said...

Robert Covington signing a 4 year/$62M contract is a cool story. And he deserves it.

rob said...

i have seen the future, and its name is joel embiid

rob said...

got a new idea for a buddy movie. teenage girl and teenage boy are dating. they're going to see felly in the big city with a bunch of friends. their fathers take the group to the venue, then hang out for the evening having beers while the kids go to the show. antics ensue.

i'll be acting out the live version of this tomorrow night while my daughter, her boyfriend, and several of their friends go to the show. i'll let you know how it goes - it's kind of a test drive for being in-laws.

Whitney said...

Felly? I'm getting very out of touch. I know the band Belly. And Nelly. Though I'm old enough to remember Telly and Pele.

rob said...

felly is a young (18/19 y/o) rapper from socal who looks like jeff spicoli and raps about weed, among other things. here's one of his tracks:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEpoiSK7Hhg

TR said...

Whit - I’m pretty sure he means Fela Kuti.

rob said...

i'd pay a lot of money to see fela kuti. since it would mean he was resurrected.

zman said...

That's Lazarus. Mr. KQ's buddy from middle school.

zman said...

Is anyone else excited to bet against a rookie QB making his first start on the road under the influence of three hours of jetlag with a starting receiver who joined the team two weeks ago? So Billsy.

TR said...

Blue Falcon likes GE shares here under $18.50. Hold your breath and pull the trigger at a 5+ year low. Take your 2.6% yield and wait for the inevitable climb.

Mark said...

Envious was sublime last night. The 46 & 15 are the headliners if that performance for sure, but his passing out of the high post is pretty damn remarkable as well.

I’m heading to Savannah for a wedding/long weekend but stopping off in danimal’s good for the night.

T.J. said...

I think Mark just accidentally created a fantastic nickname for Embiid.

Whitney said...

Wish I had some dough to invest, Blue Falcon. But noted.

Squeaky said...

I'm investing in tickets for next years' OBFT. Got to be a greater return on my investment.

This podcast with J Tweedy about depression and addiction is pretty sobering: https://www.apmpodcasts.org/thwod/2017/11/jeff-tweedy-didnt-want-to-take-his-doctor-on-tour-because-the-doctor-was-terrible/

mr kq said...

Go heavy on the Bolts, my lock of the week. Enjoying a nice double ipa at The Veil Brewery in Richmond. Bomb Diggety. Cans to go up next.

Danimal said...

Mark - where you staying?
I'll meet you for a beer pal - please advise.

TR said...

Tribe soccer first round tourney match at home against Columbia kicks off at 7 PM. There will be tens of interested fans there.

Squeaky said...

Columbia coach looks like a younger Dave.

TR said...

Tribe-Columbia tied at 1 in double OT. Barnburner at Albert-Daly Field!

Squeaky said...

Tribe 1 - Columbia 2 -- 2OT. One and done.

TR said...

I really am the mush. 2-1 Columbia. Goal happened a minute after I typed this Fuuuucccckkkk.

TR said...

2-1 loss. I suck. Fire Chris Norris.

TR said...

Jaylen Brown is gonna be an All Star. That's my hot take.

TR said...

Kyrie has 9 pts and 5 assts through 44 mins, yet Celts are tied with GSW.

Whitney said...

Tribe Athletics having a tough year - even when they have good seasons.

rob said...

marcus smart is a motherfucker. in a good way. this game is fun.

zman said...

So, Al Franken? I did not see that coming.

Whitney said...

I didn't either. I do like that the woman has accepted his apology. She's not out for blood, she just needed to say what she said.

Mark said...

A local high school (Cocoa) is playing in a state semifinal game tonight. This is their 11th straight year in a state semifinal game. It’s a relatively small school in a poor city. The football program is top notch and gets a ton of these kids off to
college and away from Cocoa. Kids who would have no chance of this happening otherwise. I don’t root for high schools other than mine often but I always root for Cocoa Football.