Wednesday, November 18, 2015

This Town Needs an Enema

I confess that the events last weekend in Paris and the resulting race to the bottom by American political and media voices (lest I be accused of partisanship, I'm looking at you, too, Chuck Schumer) have left me in a funk. Frankly, we've managed to look cowardly, xenophobic, and just plain cruel all at once.

As a response to my dismay, I found myself seeking moments of bliss to counteract the darkness. Fortunately, I'm surrounded by idiots with a penchant for joyous dipshittery. One, in particular.

Thanks, man. You're the best.




46 comments:

TR said...

Apparently, Anthony Bourdain has been quoted as saying Guy Fieri is the resultant product if Ed Hardy f*cked a juggalo. I find this sentence very amusing.

T.J. said...

I applaud this laziest of fucking lazy filler

T.J. said...

I'm wearing the emoji socks right now

rob said...

the emoji socks are my favorite.

but this post required me to execute three separate snips and write a paragraph, all while traveling on a train. so i'll thank you to keep your lazy slurs to yourself.

Mark said...

Following up on TR's Denzel Valentine comment from the last post. While that is a tremendous name and Valentine is probably my favorite player in CBB this year (in what seems like his 8th year of eligibility), he doesn't even have the best name on his own team.

That distinction belongs to Lourawls "Tum Tum" Nairn. I'm not sure why you'd give a nickname to somebody who's first name is Lourawls but a nickname like "Tum Tum" certainly doesn't hurt the overall appeal.

zman said...

I'm a huge, hyooooodge, fan of Billy Ray Valentine.

Shlara said...

I just came across a location set of The Americans. Trying not to totally geek out. Haven't seen Philip or Elizabeth yet, but I think they must be here somewhere b/c there's a gaggle of paparazzi here too

Danimal said...

Awesome. I heart Elizabeth.

TR said...

A 20 y/o Keri Russell starred in a movie called Eight Days a Week. It is terrible movie, but she is smokin' hot in it, and plays a much sluttier character than that sweater-wearing Felicity. I'm a fan. I need to dig into The Americans at some point.

TR said...

And yeah, Lourawls is the best first name in the history of ever.

rob said...

ted cruz literally told obama, 'say it to my face' today in the wake of the president's remarks about the gop's quaking response to the paris attacks. this campaign has gone beyond parody.

Geoff said...

I can still laugh at Trump's idiocy--it has some lingering, waning charms. Can't say then same for (Cruz or Carson for that matter). The amount of damage done to the Republic on a daily basis is pretty stunning.

Geoff said...

Also, this Jeb Bush as Peyton, Bush 43 as Eli and GHWB as Archie piece is pretty perfect.

http://thefederalist.com/2015/11/18/jeb-bush-is-peyton-manning-george-w-is-eli-manning/

rob said...

cruz is a deeply dangerous motherfucker. there appear to be no lengths to which he won't go in pursuit of power, which is a terrifying thing if he actually gets it.

Geoff said...

He won't get it. But he'll probably fuck up the senate for another few decades.

rob said...

that federalist piece is excellent

Dave said...

i have a "in a funk" post due up tomorrow. mediocre minds think alike!

TR said...

Nick Bockwinkel died!? Bummer.

Squeaky said...

The Flutie story is crazy sad.

rootsminer said...

Our mayor here in Roanoke is getting some attention for his 'inartful' statement. If you knew the level of the guy's idiocy you wouldn't be surprised. I guess he's trying to establish his refugee hatin' bona fides to run for higher office. I don't think city mayors have too much influence in that area.

On a lighter note, I was going to head down to Rocky Mount Friday to see Cracker, but just got offered two free tix to see Jason Isbell without the 35 minute drive.

Mark said...

I've gotten to know Flutie just a bit the last few years since he moved back and became a semi regular attendee to our pickup basketball run. He's an impossibly nice guy and very close to his parents.

That is some sad shit that happened today.

Whitney said...

RE: Flutie, it is indeed sad for Doug and his kin but tremendously beautiful and poetic. I don't believe in all that much that defies traditional, tangible logic, but I wholly believe in people dying of a broken heart. I have seen it too many times to give it any other name. It's bittersweet and romantic.

Clarence said...

Bourdain has repeatedly had it out for Guy Fieri, which makes him very unappealing to me. When he had the Black Keys on his show he goaded them into mocking Guy. Made me have a little disdain for them, even. Popular haute couture with condescending disdain for popular working class cheez is not palatable to me. Stop being a prick and put your own self out there on the line a little bit with some vulnerability. You are giving tall guys a bad rep, you 6'4" little prick.

TR said...

Jeez, good job trampling on Whitney's poetic comments, Clarence.

rob said...

clarence is kind of a dick, if we're being honest

rob said...

i was in times square earlier today. wish i'd known i was supposed to be terrified.

zman said...

Isbell kicks ass. If no one yells "Play 'Outfit'!" he might actually play "Oufit". So don't yell "Outfit!"

rootsminer said...

Got it Z. I'll just be the high-larious guy asking for "Free Bird"!

rob said...

tribe plays something called washington adventist tonight. i assume their school song is 'christmas in washington'. which will please the teej greatly.

this is a tuneup for saturday's road trip to dayton, where the tribe's early momentum will get a great test.

Mark said...

The wife and I discussed the Bourdain-Fieri thing a couple days ago and our thoughts were similar to Clarence's. It's fine he doesn't like Fieri or his brand. It's fine to state that. Bourdain's insistence on constantly harping on it and going out of his way to bring it up comes off as petty and small on his part. Simply said, it's just not a good look.

TR said...

Where's Dave's post? He said he would post something. What a lazy bastard...

Clarence said...

Ask yourself this: who's more Gheorghey, Anthony Bourdain or Guy Fieri? Guy the Guido in a landslide. I'm not a foodie, I'd rather watch Triple D than No Reservations any day of the week, and I enjoy the places I've been that have been featured in its episodes. (Although, honestly, Tortuga's missed the boat featuring Pork Antonio and Jerk Chicken when the fish tacos or burrito or even Coco Loco would be far more apropos.)

Chefs and their ilk have been arrogant pricks since food was first cooked on something besides an open fire, I suppose, but I'll take the clown prince of greasy spoon grub over the haughty purveyor of proper potables.

rob said...

i completely agree. with tr. where the hell is dave?

Clarence said...

Where the Hell is Dave (aka Bill)?

Mark said...

I think you can make a good case Bourdain is pretty Gheorghey too. He likes to get fucked up in a number of different ways, is a huge music fan and has shown that he doesn't take himself too seriously many times on his various travel channel programs.

I just think repeatedly going out of his way to hammer Fieri is pointless and, frankly, easy. He's not exactly on an island in the culinary world with his open disdain for Guy.

zman said...

Action Bronson does a good Fieri impression.

Where's Waldo? Where-I the hell-I am I?

Marls said...

Hey Dave!

rob said...

dave's a killer.

we're awfully focused on the bourdain/fieri contretemps up in here. no judgment.

Whitney said...

It's easier to deal with than the real world

Marls said...

ISIS are are bunch of terrorists. ISIS wants to attack Times Square. Fieri has a restaurant in Times Square. That means terrorists want to attack Guy Fieri. Bourdain keeps attacking Fieri. Anthony Bourdain must be a member of ISIS.

Danimal said...

That couldn't be more obvious.

Mark said...

Guy Fieri and Anthony Bourdain agree that tonight's Jaguars uniforms are TRASH.

Dave said...

posted my "in a funk" post on SoD . . . sorry for the mix up. probably should have been on G:TB, considering the length, with a cross-promotional link. my bad. i'm over it-- and zman's comment has pushed me towards the correct answer on the scooter question.

rob said...

looks like the tribe was looking ahead a bit this evening. let washington adventist get within 8 at the 12:00 mark before running them out of the gym and winning by 25. hunter seacat(!) was perfect from the field, and stuffed the stat sheet with a single rebound, assist, steal, block, and foul. hunter seacat!

TR said...

So, um, Johnny O'Bryant of the Milwaukee Bucks does not look like you might guess somebody with that name would.

And Varejao's wispy Movember stache is splendiferous.

Dave said...

some gheorghies--