Monday, October 01, 2012

United We Stand

Gentlemen of the household of Gheorghe, I call on you to stand and be counted.

Cancer, as we know, sucks. Fuck Cancer, as a matter of fact. There are a number of excellent charitable organizations raising funds in support of cancer prevention efforts, but none of them combine noble aims with Gheorghian dipshittery quite so well as does the Movember movement. TR first brought Movember to our attention all the way back in 2008, and in typical G:TB fashion, we ignored it. I submit that this must change.

In a nutshell, Movember seeks to raise funds for cancer awareness, research, and survivorship support through the growth of lip hair (male, preferably, but to each her own - and check out this great Reddit story on the topic). Mo Bros (that's a painfully awful name, for sure, but I'm grudgingly willing to overlook it in the name of charity) begin November 1 clean-shaven, then spend the rest of the month growing the most spectacular facial topiaries possible. They raise money by engaging sponsors for their 'stachinations.

I propose to you, men of G:TB, that we initiate our own Movember chapter and join 1.9 million men worldwide in telling cancer to eat a bag of dicks. Discuss below, and if you're interested, I'll take care of the logistics.

Fuck cancer. And fuck shaving.

21 comments:

Danimal said...

ryder cup hangover. observations from having watched now on the dvr and having now had time to 2nd guess decisions
-not playing keegan and phil on sat, the 2 hottest players in the world = epic fail
-not starting your top 3-4 hottest players in yesterday's singles to put the proverbial foot on throat = retarded
-dl III saying to someone - "we didn't think it would matter what order we put them out in" = my concern w/dl III being cap't going back 2 years...nice guy/no killer instinct
-furyk/stricken/woods 1-9-1 NINE TIMES.....NINE TIMES???....NINE TIMES...
-i don't see us ever beating the euros. it certainly won't happen at gleneagles
-the euro's reaction to finding out molinari made tiger putt and subsequently missing = fucked up but can't blame them - just wish the t.v. wouldn't have caught it
-is furyk still standing over that putt?
-i hope tiger doesn't automatically qualify for next year's team and our capt has the cajones not to pick him.

Danimal said...

next year as in '14

Geoff said...

I think DL3 did a perfectly competent job, and I thought the order he sent out was well contemplated. If you can't win 5 matches out of twelve, you don't deserve to win.

That said, you knew Ollie had to send his four best our first...I think reversing Davis order would have made some sense...sending out the hot players at the end.

But again, we lost 8 matches outright. That's not bad leadership--that's choking.

rob said...

in other news, i'm happy that the red sox' suckitude is making things difficult for the yankees

Geoff said...

In more positive news, RG3 is 4th in the NFL in passer rating, third in yards per attempt and 2nd in completion percentage after 4 weeks. The Redskins lead the NFC in touchdowns and have the third ranked offense in the NFL. Apparently the QB positions matters when it comes to offensive production.

zman said...

Unless you play the Jets, in which case you can score 34 points even if your QB throws for a meager 143 yards.

Jerry said...

Sitting Keegan Saturday afternoon was bad news. Maybe Phil needed the break, but that seems kind of crazy to me - they were closing guys out early and didn't have to grind under pressure.

The Tiger thing really complicates matters for the captain. If he can only play with Stricker, that is (and was) a huge problem. I don't have a problem with Tiger playing on Saturday, but if you can't pair him with a guy like Bradley, then it's a problem. Maybe this is just narrative and not fact, but Tiger isn't anywhere near good enough right now to get the "11 + 1" treatment.

Stricker and Furyk turned out to be bad picks. There was a good ole boys component to their selection and the old "experience" factor. Guess what, Furyk's experience is getting his ass handed to him in the Ryder Cup. He was never making those putts down the stretch. I doubt anybody had confidence they were going in. And Stricker was just toxic out there.

And rookies can do OK. Bradley and Dufner were 2 of our best. Simpson was good. Only Snedeker was a disappointment out of the rookies. Plus Fowler and Mahan aren't rookies anyway.

Tiger has to get up on Molinari in that match. I know it didn't matter in the end on points, but having a 3 or 4 up on the board might have changed some things.

And how about some on course communication about 18? Several Americans played the ball way past the pin and they all read about 8 feet too much break into the putt from the back of the green.

Credit to Poulter and Rose for playing out of their ass on key holes, but the rest of it was the US choking on it. I can't believe we gave that one away.

Geoff said...

You raise a good point about on course communication--in past Ryder's, captains on both sides were all over the course, getting in guys ears and sharing info. While I wasn't on the ground, there were many remarks made about Davis not really being a presence on the course. Having laid back guys like DL3 and Freddie may not be wise...which surprises no one.

Jerry said...

Yeah, I don't know if they did it, but just saying, "Hey, 18 is playing a little shorter than it looks and if you hit it to the back of the green, don't hit your putt 10 feet left" might have made a difference.

I don't know if it was really playing short or guys were just jacked up, but most of them looked like they thought they hit good shots and really the just gave themselves difficult 2-putts.

Danimal said...

real quick & dirty math...euro's beat us by 15 shots: -31 to -16
3 guys of the 24 shot over par - woods, stricker and molinari; 2 guys shot even par - kaymer and kuchar. obviously some of these matches ended prior to 18 holes being completed.
okay, i'm done with the '12 ryder cup.

Geoff said...

The fact that only the US guys were hitting it long tells you that either a) they were all really jacked up (unlikely) or b) the Euros were communicating about how that hole was playing and the Americans weren't.

Jerry said...

On the positive side, Dufner, Zach Johnson, and Bradley came out of this thing looking great (ngs). When things were going against us, Dufner and Zach really sacked up - there was serious pressure on their matches and they got the job done.

Bradley wasn't really tested in that way, but he was tremendous in the fiery front-runner role.

Danimal said...

true dat...hopefully they'll be relevant in 2 years.

TR said...

That's not even my best stache photo on this site.

I am quite intrigued by Movember. I have a work trip and a high school reunion mid-month, but I may persevere. And I think the essence of the event is HAVING a stache all month, not growing one. A month is too short to grow a good one. So I recommend a few weeks of a beard or goatee leading in.

TR said...

Thank you, Clay Buchholz. Go Rays!

mayhugh said...

I became a Dufner fan during this past week. Never really liked him - too understated, too South-Carolina looking, no personality. But really enjoyed his steady iron play and putting. He withstood a fairly strong run and recovered from a couple of bad knee-knockers mid-way through the round.

I would love to see Bradley paired up with Dufner or Johnson, just for the dichotomy. I wanted to enjoy Bradley more but his pre-shot routine, for someone that doesn't watch golf all the time, was a lot to endure.

I want to feel bad for Stricker and Furyk but can't. They were overmatched all week but it's not like there was no precedent for that.


Shlara said...

NATITUDE!

zman said...

Black Rebel Motorcycle Club has, improbably, become the most frequently used band for TV ads. Based solely on my TV viewing of course.

zman said...

Those were two odd back to back INT.

Mark said...

So many turnovers. Are either of these teams even any good?

Shlara said...

They've run out of champagne and beer in the Nats clubhouse so they are now pouring juice on each other's heads.

I love it!