Sunday, February 06, 2011

Super Bowl Open Thread Smorgasbord

The title. That's all I got so far. And this hot Packers fan:


This is truly a work in progress, as I am at work...and need to make some progress on the Penske file. This post will slowly evolve as I lose my mind in this cube.

11:18am. Our Super Bowl correspondent has checked in via the tweet box - she has survived the icy Dallas weather.  And speaking of the tweet box, you might want to check out this dude and this clown. Good times can be had by all.

11:29am. The search for a hot Pittsburgh fan is taking longer than I expected. This is not schtick. it shouldn't be this difficult. And since no one asked, I honestly think "Paul Revere" is my favorite Beastie Boys song of all time...

11:40am. It's apparently underboob image day...that works for me.


11:43am. Holy shit, Mike Tomlin's black? And went to William and Mary?

11:51am. A story for you all (that you have already heard me tell drunkenly a thousand times): When I was a freshman in high school I dislocated my hip, and was laid up for quite some time at home before I even got the pleasure to grab a pair of crutches and limp around school for the next six months. While bumming at home in bed, I played Super Tecmo Bowl. A lot. Finding this clip just gave me more fucked up flashbacks than Tim Robbins in Jacob's Ladder (especially the sound effects - they have a visceral effect on me):



12:09pm. Filler within filler disguised as an open thread. Someone get Christoper Nolan on the horn. "Chris. Chris. It's Marvin - your cousin, Marvin NOLAN. You know that new scifi film you're looking for? Well, check this out." What the hell is TJ talking about? "Fashion is Dumb" filler - this week's winner? Wearable Planters. I'm counting on Mark to survive his Bachelor Party weekend in Vegas so he can use this in the most *cough* creative way possible.

12:42pm. I am too lazy to go back and see what people's picks were for the game, so please just pick again in the comments. I am still waffling on my pick. Which reminds me, what's your favorite way to have hashbrowns at Waffle House? I keep it simple (as you might expect) and go "covered". Ketchup only, of course.

12:44pm. The live version of "One Of These Days" just came on Pandora. I guess working on Super Bowl Sunday really is the new Bumming Dome.

12:47pm. Hold the phone - google/Pandora is really starting to freak me out. Chuck Berry's Johnny B. Goode is playing now. Less than an hour after that "Back to the Future" joke. To quote the kids these days....WTF???

12:55pm. Prop betting - perhaps the funnest thing the Super Bowl has to offer. I took a quick screengrab of prop bets...we need to get a hold of Ace and Gary in Vegas to place an Official G:TB Prop Bet (should we look into trademarking our name? I hear it's the new vajazzling)


1:09pm. I'm definitely rooting for Green Bay, so I'll say 28-24 Packers...and a defensive player on the Pack ends up being MVP. I think my work here is done (literally and figuratively)...see everyone back here for the game:

And no, I do not care that one of these ladies has the wrong team colors. That's not what I'm focused on.

115 comments:

rob said...

pretty good start for the teej here at gheorghe: the lad mag.

Geoff said...

I'm also at work. Work sucks.

zman said...

High Plains Drifter.

T.J. said...

That reminds me, I saw True Grit last night. Loved it.

zman said...

I can't decide for whom to root. Tomlin, natch, but I'm completely not down with Roethlisberger. And the Aaron Rodgers/Greg Jennings tandem delivered my first FFL championship this year.

mayhugh said...

I'm rooting for the Pack. It's funny how the talking heads are all saying Rodgers is no longer in Favre's shadow. Whatever you think of that statement, that shadow talk gets immediately revived if Rodgers has a bad game and the Packers lose.

rob said...

really torn from a rooting interest perspective. kinda just hoping for an entertaining game. 27-21, pack.

T.J. said...

We know Shlara has the Steelers...but did we get a score prediction?

T.J. said...

Dennis, can you post our squares numbers here? Gracias.

Danimal said...

STILLERS win or lose by 1 or 2. hope hope.

Shlara said...

Just parked at the Six Flags lot. Now on a shuttle bus to Cowboy Stadium. Lovely sunny day in Dallas. They seem to think the best way to treat to roads is with sand, so the highway is a big dust bowl. Did I mention that I'm here with my mom? She's a huge Steelers fan and has been chatting with everyone in black and gold since we arrived in the city. Also have my two Vegas friends and their parents...it's like herding cats. I need a drink. No score predictions, just a win by the Steelers.

T.J. said...

Danimal in with his wager...Michael Jack? What say you? TR and Marls? The Zman?

zman said...

I seem to recall sand, not salt, used to treat snowy roads in VA. The locals feared that salt would mess up their cars. I noted that accidents are more likely to mess up cars but no one listens to me.

Shlara said...

PS. Picked up my game tix at the NFL hotel yesterday. Lots of people I probably should have recognized in the lobby and many more who wanted to be recognized. Saw some Pats fans run after Bob Kraft as he left the men's room--he kindly stokers for a photo

T.J. said...

Zman, still looks like a sandbar around here after the snow melts...

Danimal said...

feeling for you sunday workers. what up with that?

Shlara said...

Oh and the ticket market is still insane. Our friends picked up heir 300 level seats and hour ago from a broker. Paid $2500 per and the broker wanted to buy them back immediately for $3500 each.

T.J. said...

Serious question - would anyone sell them back, pocket the two grand and spend it all on booze and "other"?

I would.

Shlara said...

Two more notes:
1. I can't type on the iPhone
2. I'm wearing my Tribe hat to support Mike T

T.J. said...

We will need photos for the recap post.

rob said...

hell yeah, i would. especially if i didn't really have a rooting interest. which, conveniently, happens to be the case in the nfl right now.

see how i did that, teej?

zman said...

I'll take the Steelers. Roethlisberger will have a Ray Lewisesque transformation from accused violent felon to SB MVP. Photos of Aaron Rodgers' schlong will appear in Shlara's phone. Students in Swem will applaud Tomlin's victory for 10 seconds, and then bend back over their laptops.

rob said...

dammit. that response was to the teej's question.

also, tr - wolverhampton?

zman said...

Speaking of seeing people, for Christmas the zfather-in-law got us tickets to see Merchant of Venice and dinner at the Four Seasons. He told the box office that I have a vision problem (which is technically true, I wear glasses) so we literally had front row dead-center tickets. Al Pacino spit all over me. If he had a dip in I would have had a flashback to 1993.

But more importantly, yesterday was Hank Aaron's 77th birthday. I know this because he celebrated at the Four Seasons. Along with Willie Mays, Harry Belafonte, Bill Clinton, Clinton's army of body guards, and other people I probably should have recognized.

Shlara said...

I've never been to a SB so I'm not sure what the crowd usually looks like but I have to say that there are very few corporate types here. Most people are wearing steelers and lakers gear

T.J. said...

Go Lakers!

rob said...

they were originally from minneapolis. which is near green bay. i can see it.

rob said...

wisconsin is woodshedding the izzos

Shlara said...

Standing behind the fox broadcasters. Wearing black and gold. Can you see me?

Shlara said...

How did the iPhone change "packers" to "lakers". In line for food. Passed up a $14 bucket of popcorn for a $5 hot dog to go with my free pepsi zero

Shlara said...

I feel like TJ giving a food report. And I wish I would have taught my mom how to text before we made this trip

Igor said...

Afternoon, everybody. I am back from work like my fellow loser GTBers, and ready to down a few bowls of loudmouth soup. I think the Steelers take it, 23-21, though I will probably be rooting for the Pack since the party is at an obnoxious Steelers fan's house.

In defiance of Dave's open letter, I'm going to drink a lot tonight AND go to work bright and early tomorrow. That's right.

rob said...

igor!

Danimal said...

are ya'll in retail? foot locker? jcpenney?

Marls said...

I am in a cab heading to my usual SBS bar. I'm not sure what my numbers are yet, but the final is worth 65K. If I hit the final, the teej should gas up the G:TB jet and we can meet everybody in Vegas.

Shlara said...

Battery running low. In our seats. 40 yd line on Steelers side. 400 level. We will see every play develop

Squeaky said...

What time does the game actually start?

Lazy.

Marls said...

6:29 squeaks.

rob said...

$65k? what's the buy-in, rockefeller?

/oldguylingo

zman said...

I'm a sell all my guns, and with the cash I'm a bring you to Vegas.

Mark said...

Evening ladies. Vegas is fantastic. Tons Of Packets and Steelers fans here. I have destroyed my liver over the past two days and am about to do it all over again.

I don't have a dog in this SB fight but I do have about 20 prop bets directing various rooting interests. I also took Pittsburgh and the points last minute. Fade the public.

Mark said...

And, I didn't mean Packers fans. I was talking about the Digital Underground album, Sex Packets. It's huge out here.

Also, I doubt any of you follow ?uestlove on Twitter BUT evidently The Roots just played a show at W&M, ?uest said it was the best college show they've played in 15 years. Well done, Wrens.

T.J. said...

Declaration of Independence...long. Read by too many 'tards.

Marls said...

1,100 rob.

Steelers 9, packers 2.

Dagger

zman said...

Freaks of the Industry is my jam!

Danimal said...

looking for a heath miller touchdown early....among other things

Mark said...

Sometimes i think Zman is trying to make me gay for him.

rob said...

give us a few of your props, mark, so we know what to root for.

zman said...

I am. But Sex Packets is one of the most slept-on hiphop albums ever.

Mark said...

Heath Miller, over 38.5 receiving yards. One of my many props. I've decided that I should be called Prop Joe tonight.

zman said...

Who Got Da Props?

Mark said...

Stop Z, just stop it.

Props: OT (+750) only reason I bet it. Longest TD scored, 50.5, under. Roethlisberger/Kuhn-most rising yds (Kuhn). Driver rec: 3.5(over). Hines Ward rec: 3.5 (over). Mike Wallace, longest rec, 20.5 yds(over). Total packers w/ a rushing attempt: 4.5(over). James Starks, 47.5 rushing yds(under).

There you go. I expect you to root for me, rob.

T.J. said...

Aguilera gonna hit the over for sure...

zman said...

I don't think she got the word right. She said nothing about ramparts.

Danimal said...

rodgers completes first pass - missed that one;
td pass at some point; more than 272 yds; 23 completions or more; 35 attempts or more; rodgers 1st rush under 4.5 yds; no int's; 246-299 yds; a completion more than 35.5 yds; ben - 191-245 yds; 36.5 yd completion or more; heath miller 1st td; gb kicks off..

T.J. said...

Vomit-rod.

T.J. said...

Fuck you Big Ben.

TR said...

I guess I'm rooting for the Pack, but I want a close game more than anything. So I'll take the TD from Ward, even though he's a dirty bitch.

Danimal said...

I do a better axl than Fergie

Will I Am is Mike Tomlin

rob said...

agreed. and that td gave me the quarter in my squares pool. pales in comparison to daddy marlsbucks, mind you.

zman said...

This is an amazingly unmusical halftime performance. Why is Usher wearing MC Hammer pants?

rob said...

fergie appears to benefit from modern vocal modification technologies

zman said...

How do you collect a $65k payoff without alerting the IRS? If it's all cash, can you let me know when and where the payoff occurs so that I can mug you?

Igor said...

Guys, please back me up in this if I am right. Unbeknownst to me, the Super Bowl party I went to ended at halftime. I repeat: Ended at halftime. These people are Dave-ish faggots. Are you fucking kidding me? Please tell me if I am wrong for dropping a series of sarcastic comments and ended up at our friends' party where narcotics rule the outcome.

Marls said...

Zman- payment is made in cash. The key to tax free pay out is not depositing said lump sums. Not that I would know, but I assume a safe deposit box is the way to go.

Marls said...

Igor, that is the NY Mets of superbowl parties. You should have gone upper deck and shit in their toilet tank.

T.J. said...

Igor, good call on the narcotics party.

The other people can rot in hell.

Marls said...

Really douchie Steelers fan has just started chirping. I may need to start rooting for the Pack.

TR said...

Marls - you at Pete's?

Danimal said...

The Jones drop was as good as a turnover

Geoff said...

I'm looking forward to the part of the game where the Steelers get screwed over for having Shaun Shuisham as their kicker.

TR said...

Does Zman love Zombo as one of the few guys who are behind him alphabetically?

T.J. said...

Yeah, just keep making Pirates of the Carribean movies...

Geoff said...

The Packers have a shit-ton of white dudes on their Roster. Most white starters in the league.

TR said...

A bit late on this, but Cowboys vs Aliens? Really? With Harrison Ford? Is he mailing it in for funds for his wife's bulimia issues?

TR said...

ZOMBO!!!

T.J. said...

In five minutes this entire game has changed. Because of dropsies.

TR said...

Suisham.....just a bit outside.

Geoff said...

Shuisham! That was tits.

Danimal said...

Nice kick. If playing golf, that's OB

zman said...

I have a zoomer for Zombo.

Cowboys v. Aliens would be ok if it were tongue-in-cheek like Army of Darkness. Or if it's supposed to be a legit sci-fi flick then it needs a different name.

zman said...

Eminem pimps both brisk teas and Fiats?

T.J. said...

I want a Chrysler.

zman said...

The zwoman asks "Eminem really drives a Chrysler?"

Marls said...

Chrysler...fuck yeah. Dee-troit rock city.

Geoff said...

All of the Redskins players I follow on Twitter think the Chrysler ad was awesome. They plan to buy that new car and put a Bentley grill and hood ornament on it.

zman said...

The Redskins are all losers though.

Geoff said...

That is correct.

Danimal said...

did i see dan snyder in a commercial yesterday, speaking of losers/redskins...

Geoff said...

Was it an ad for the human personification of a shit stain?

T.J. said...

Alf is a Panthers fan?

Danimal said...

no - haynesworth was in that one.
snyder is in an nfl fan commercial.

Geoff said...

Yeah, that's surprising. Vicky from Small Wonder is a Texans fan I hear.

zman said...

I saw Snyder in an ad for The Human Centipede Part III.

Danimal said...

3 TO's and a missed FG = no shot

Geoff said...

I feel like Miguel had the idea for The Human Centipede during a frat meeting in '96.

zman said...

Jordy Nelson for MVP?

I think Alf likes the Panthers because he eats cats.

zman said...

Was he the quimby?

T.J. said...

I like my 28-24 prediction quite a bit right now...

Geoff said...

Yes, and Carles was the head.

From what I hear, Igor likes his lady friends to keep their crotchal region like Brett Keisel's beard.

Danimal said...

stillers, like nkotb....hangin tough

T.J. said...

OT, can we hope?

zman said...

Diddy AND Draper in the Benz ad?

Danimal said...

we can hope but stillers might not need it...don't want to count on your man suisham to get it into ot

Marls said...

Come on Ben. Just like sticking it in an unwilling coed.

Marls said...

Or not.

rob said...

anyone else pick the packers by 6? no, just me?

and my wife won the final square. big night for the team.

zman said...

The Camaro makes it all worthwhile.

Shlara said...

Battery running low. In our seats. 40 yd line on Steelers side. 400 level. We will see every play develop

Shlara said...

Bad cell reception in the stadium. Rough loss. Some random notes since I couldn't text during the game: lots of real fans from both teams which was really cool; two d-bag Texas dudes sitting next to u were there just to see the half time show; tomlin going for two on that TD was awesome and our side went nuts; that big screen in the stadium is unreal---like you are in your living room; during a TO they showed a clips of the Bills playof game where Steve Chrisite kicked a FG to win; NFL has a major failure with the merch stands--not enough and not organized; no maps of fan fest or concourse; parking lot exit is worse than a Skins game. Still had an awesome time. Still glad I went. Still love my Steelers. Now sitting at Denny's waiting for my grand slam breakfast. The End

Dave said...

wow igor-- even the teacher party lasted until after the game (although i was getting pretty sleepy b/c of second helping of turkey chili).

more importantly, which view is more titillating-- under boob or cleavage?

T.J. said...

All boob is good boob.

So sayeth the Teej.

Danimal said...

loser of money last night, but not nearly as bad as i thought thanks to a few of those prop bets.

a coworker here split a 9k square. bastard

how's igor today, and why was the douchey party even on the agenda last night?

Dave said...

douchey party was on the agenda so that he could complain about the people's lameness, of course.

Danimal said...

you twitterers out there...omgfacts has a good one today..."The Golden Douche"
omgfactssex actually, retweeted by the former