On the third day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me:
Six splurges for Christmas
Five Good News Stories, courtesy of Shlara
Two beers with Marcus Aerelius, an OBX Dave Joint, and
Two(?) dudes bested by Kazansky
Yeah, I know I did something like this last year. Whatever, I'm a material girl and I like to splurge.
1. A Wrensilva record console
My grandmother had this big piece of wooden furniture in her living room. It had a radio and a turntable and cabinet to hold records. The record player could even flip the record when it got to the end. I think she threw it out when she sold her house. At the time it seemed useless but right now I'd like to have it.
I'm not alone in this regard and Wrensilva has the answer. They sell hand-made wooden record consoles in three different sizes with modern accoutrements like Sonos and Bluetooth. They are expensive and obsolete but oddly I want one (but I'm too cheap and don't have a place to put it). Seems like a nice splurge for you vinyl fans out there.
2. A mechanical watch
I've said it before and I'll say it again: everyone should have a mechanical watch. I understand why you might love the functionality of your AppleWatch or your G-Shock, or the ease of your quartz timepiece, but interacting with a little machine that keeps track of time through gears and a spring is just a great experience. You can find good ones at any price point too. zfamily vacationed in Switzerland this summer and while the distaff members went to an art museum to see a Picasso/El Greco dual exhibit, zson and I staggered around Basel, eating street meat and ducking into stores. We found a Patek Phillipe dealer but it was closed (probably for the best if you've met zson) but next to it was an Oris dealer. They gave us free water, iced tea, chocolates and ice cream (zson ate deeply from the ice cream fridge) and let us look at their wares. Their best offering, in my humble view, is the Divers Sixty-Five with the gray ombre dial and light blue markers. Yes, it would be cooler if it was the Divers Sixty-Nine. Yes, Tiffany blue dials are way too trendy right now. Yes, $2,400 is a lot to spend on a watch. Whatever, go try one on you'll see what I mean.
Maybe you already followed my advice and bought a mechanical watch. Is it a GMT? You need that extra hour hand to track a second time zone! You're a ramblin' man! Pimpin' all over the world! Magnum had one for Pete's sake! You need a Zodiac Super Sea Wolf "Pan Am" World Time GMT. Then you can not only tell time in two places at once, you can say "I don't like that Pan Am coffee ..." when people ask about your watch.
3. Some pants from Duck Head
I know you remember Duck Head, purveyor of chinos in the south in the 1980s and 1990s. They're back, or at least someone bought the trademark and stuck it on some chinos. And they're good chinos! Not so slim that you look like you're wearing your girlfriend's pants, and not so baggy that you look like a slob. zwoman got me some shirts and a jacket too. You won't be disappointed.
4. A Meater
Meater is not the name of an app for casual sex, although it should be. It's a wifi and Bluetooth enabled leave-in meat thermometer. You stick it in your meat, then set it to a temperature on your phone. It will tell your phone when your meat is ready.
5. A Donald Trump NFT
I'm kidding when I say you should buy DJ Trump's NFT's. I'm not kidding about their existence, I'm kidding about buying them because (1) they're sold out and (2) he's a piece of shit. They exist! I will find the time to make a full post out of this, but for now I'll just say that being Trump is a license to print money--he sold all 45,000 of his NFTs at $99 a pop. That's almost $4.5 million. For NFT's like this, featuring Trump chipping out of a sand trap with a salami in his pants:
Mr. KQ was obliquely mentioned in an ur-WCSaGD post entitled "WWzD/Automotive Alphabet Aerobics: T is for Triumph, Alternatively Titled: WWzD, Mr. KQ Edition." I know he has an emotional connection to TR6s but I didn't get into that at all. However, this post partially birthed WCSaGD.
You are an awesome person if you're getting Mr. KQ a TR6 for Gheorghemas. But if you want my advice, I'd consider something else for him.
I met Mr. KQ at Gheorghefest. His hi-fi setup is legendary. He's a little bit older and a lot cooler than me, although the latter is a low bar. And speaking of bars, Mr. KQ knows beers. He knows smooth jams to rock the party and the ladies, so he needs something that can hold a party or an intimate encounter. And cargo room is useful in his line of work.
You should get Mr. KQ a 1977 Dodge Tradesman B200 finished in yellow over a beige and brown interior, powered by a 360 cubic inch V8 paired with a three-speed automatic transmission, with a body kit with a rear spoiler and front lip spoiler, a sunroof, side pipes, oval-shaped windows, swivel captains chairs, button-tufted and quilted vinyl interior panels, a bed platform, LED lighting, a refrigerator, a flat-panel TV, an aftermarket sound system, a mirrored bar, and wine bottle storage.
Posts
12 comments:
"Have I ever gotten a WCSaGD more right?"
i would submit that the answer is no. that is a phenommmmmmmmenal call.
Strong Uncle Rico vibes with that ride.
You forgot to mention that the van has a CB Radio.
I'm wearing Duck Head chinos as I read this. Nice work!
I'd LOVE that record console but not for that price tag. Yipes.
The Meater, though... that could work nicely for my budget.
I don't wear watches but my meat thermometer is on its way out. Might need to splurge on the Meater.
I've got my eye on that meat rod as well. I have a bluetooth setup that doesn't have quite enough reach for my liking.
entertaining post but i disagree with all your gift ideas. i don't need any of that shit. i also disagree with the first line of the post.
You dispute the notion that Zman’s grandmother had a big piece of wooden furniture in her living room?
on the third day of gheorghemas? one two five? that's three sir.
Who are three people who have never been in my kitchen.
this is the most arithmophobic of all gheorghemases
8th grade. Playing pickup hoops at night at middle school outdoor court under the lights. Chain hoops. Up rolls a converted van just like above. Skynyrd blastin. Some vagrant from the other side of the tracks in McLean. We work his boys in 3 on 3, but still get invited in to drink some Miller High Lifes and hit the tokemaster. Good times. Great post. Cheers.
Post a Comment