The Twelve Days of Gheorghemas: Day Eleven

On the Eleventh Day of Gheorghemas, Big Gheorghe gave to me

Eleven Months of Dipshits

Ten (plus) Buffalo wins
Nine Joyous Moments
Eight Hot (or Lukewarm) Takes

Seven Books For Reading

Six Footie Jerseys

Five musicians from San Antonio known as the Sir Douglas Quintet

A four-part Japanese life strategy (as told by our man in the OBX)

Three 80's Baseball Sports Looks

Too Many Entries,

and a Cameo That Will Go Down in History

As we sat together at dinner on Christmas Day, my wife asked each of us what positive things happened to us during this annus horribilis. I said something about getting to spend so much more time at home with family, which has been a true blessing - one of the silver linings this year for me is the literally thousands of hours spent at home that would have normally been spent in an office or commuting. Had I been more aware at the time, I would've also noted that the pandemic has been good for business, G:TB division.

We're nearing 260 posts for 2020, which marks our highest output since 2015, back when we were young and fit. The total number of posts will wind up nearly 70 more than 2019. And our posts had much more diversity than in years past, at least according to the eye test. 2020 marked Whitney's most productive year, and TR's too. OBX Dave lit the lamp (that's what we call it when someone posts) far more often in this, his rookie year, than while he was merely guest-posting. Old Dave, less so, but he was trying to teach while wearing PPE and working from a steampunk standing desk setup. If nothing else, COVID-19 has helped us all understand our true priorities. Those being, obviously, postcount. 

But this annual post is a celebration of quality rather than quantity. We had a bit of both this year. And so, as Bugs and Daffy used to sing, on with the show, this is it.

January

Came out firing in the first month of the year, by...posting Day 11 of Gheorghemas 2019. That shoulda been a harbinger. Also foreshadowing, fully 10 of the month's 22 posts featured music prominently. I'm not going to look it up (because lazy), but it certainly feels to me like music played an even more significant role here in 2020. And I'm very okay with that.

The first real post of 2020 was TR's celebration of his Amazon account turning 22 years old. Doozy.

Whitney closed the books on 2019 with Day 12. Who needs a Gregorian calendar when you've got a Gheorghian one?

Zman rolled out his Shazam! search history.

Mark was (very) briefly pretty closely connected to a Division I hoops coach, and I got to drop Brett Blizzard into a post.

And when the wombat comes, you should embrace him, for he is a noble motherfucker.

This filler post by Whitney featured one of my favorite videos of the year - kids in sundresses and Vans performing Fugazi's 'Waiting Room'.

Squirrel died too soon.

In another bit of foreshadowing, new resident of the masthead Dave Fairbank closed the month with an insider's view of decline of local news.

February

We dropped 21 posts in the last normal month of 2020. We were so innocent then. Ten more music posts, too. 

Mercifully for us and for our readers (which, I guess, is redundant), we pulled back on our overtly political posts this year. But the first post of February was a pretty fucking bleak essay on the Impeachment of our asshole President*. As I've said before and will again, Trump is a symptom. The disease is the corroded, wayward core of the Republican party.

Fatts Russell meets a third of Small, Cox, and Peters.

Fairbank's Comrade Teel moved on from the Southside, and Whitney was there to chronicle it. In a manner of speaking. Also gave us an excuse to post our favorite photo of OBX Dave.

Shosholoza.

Teej found an Atari hotel. Pretty on-brand.

2020's first Wrenball post found me caught between emotions. The rest of the year nearly fully vindicated me. #hugemistake

The year's first WCSAGD, in which Zman called Mark the Gheorghie "the only Gheorghie who could plausibly be a character in a Fast and Furious movie".

Whitney managed to work the Beastie Boys and Clint Eastwood into a lengthy musing about Michael Bloomberg's suitability as a potential Trump-beater/country-savior. I know what you're thinking, and you're correct.

The Teej is moving up in the world.

Zman said this in a post about the Democratic Presidential candidates: 

"Ultimately I really truly believe that Trump will lose in November no matter his opponent. Despite all my foregoing snark, I think that voters will be highly motivated in PA, WI, OH, and MI (which appear to be the only states that matter because they are the only ones that could go either way) and I have to imagine that they are picking up what the Democrats are putting down, namely lots of free stuff, income equality, a return to sanity and normalcy, etc. Trump ran on populism but it isn't clear to me that these four states are any better off than they were in 2016, and Bloomberg and Steyer will hopefully dip deeply into their fortunes to get the vote out. So keep your chins up!" 

We should probably listen to Z more often.

Whit exhorted us all early in the year to post more content, and he did his part. This musing on Mazzy Star's only hit was dope.

March

Twenty-three posts in March, and damn near every one worth a re-read. The beginning of the pandemic in the U.S. brought out both comedy and impressively thoughtful work (though only five posts about music). You guys should write a book.

Z has written a lot of glorious posts featuring charts and gifs. This exposition of the Curve of Drunkenness might be his magnum opus.

Nathan Knight is the GOAT.

Whitney tried his hand at zjurisprudence.

And bid a fond adieu to The Trellis, where I asked my wife to marry me.

Though we'd been talking about it in the comments, our first real mention of the pandemic came in this post, which featured Turkish soccer and U.S. Reed. Because Gheorghe.

Our next post was the first of our semi-recurring feature that petered out eventually, Corona Files. OBX Dave gave us the view from the beach, pandemic version.

TR kicked off the Official GTB Post-Apocalypse Soundtrack.

Speaking of soundtracks, zman created one based on the 'neck.

Since we couldn't have an NCAA Tournament, we asked OBX Dave to write about it. Decent consolation prize.

Danimal's WCSAGD is flat-out gorgeous. Like Danimal.

My daughter made her G:TB posting debut. Proud of that kid.

Here's what all of our beards and several of our dogs looked like early in the time of the Corona. Marls looks like a deejay at a second-rate EDM festival. For the record, I still haven't gone back to being clean-shaven.

April

Music returned with a vengeance in April, the topic of 55% of the month's 20 posts. Soothes the savage beasts, or something.

The prolific Dave gave us a piece about his work on a story about Joe Paterno. Before, y'know.

The Teej's birthday Zoom call was wonderfully weird and epic. With bonus Kato Kaelin.

Rootsy had a close shave, in more ways than one.

I bought an Austrian soccer team. As one does.

Whitney embarked on an ambitious documentary film (watching) project.

He also wrote a meta-review and an album review all rolled into one.

I amused myself with my own words more than once during this trip back in time. For instance: "When they write the history of Gheorghe: The Blog, I hope they spell my name right. I also hope they describe us as a mix of Sports Illustrated, High Times, and The State. Also, Cat Fancy. Can't forget about Cat Fancy.

There was Zoom music. Still is, actually.

May

May, as you'll see, was fucking weird, man. We posted about our crazy hair and mustachery. The Teej briefly lost his mind and became the Vincent Van Gogh of pie-charting. Whitney took the ball and did some research about the history of filler here. We wrote a lot about the future of college sports. And not much at all about music - only two posts this month.

TR kicked off the insanity with his resemblance to the not-very-lamented former coach of the Detroit Lions, Matt Patricia.

Les Coole released new music.

In a two-part series, I displayed my Heat Miser-esque hairstyle and then documented my daughter's taming of that mess.

Fairbank told a tale of streaking.

Z penned a beautiful and moving remembrance of his grandmother, who passed this month.

TR's pragmatic pandemic-purchases did not resemble my more spree-based spur-of-the-moment consumerism.

Teejay created a vivid graphic depicting Bonnie Tyler's Hero Requirements. It might be the Gheorghiest/Teejiest thing ever made.

Spurred by the Teej's half-assed effort at meta-filler, Whitney researched the first usage of filler as a tag on G:TB (in February 2008), then compiled a list of every single type of filler we've ever used. 145 of 'em, as of May.

Fairbank and I both had thoughts about the future of intercollegiate athletics post-pandemic. We should update our pieces post-George Floyd after watched college kids start to test their considerable collective leverage.

We took a look at the 230+ posts we had in Draft form. Some gems in there. It so inspired TR that he wrote the same post in November.

June

June was a somber month, among the most such months in G:TB's long and less-than-distinguished run. The killing of George Floyd in late May loomed large here, as we grappled with the black community's pain and the long legacy of white supremacy that's so central to it. We managed our lowest output of the year with only 18 posts, seven of which were at least tangentially about race in America.

The first day of the month saw the first post that was a mix of angry and bemused at the fuckers that perpetuate the gross inequalities in our society.

My kids are full-on ACAB. I think I know better. It's been a hard and ongoing conversation.

Shlara's first non-guestie post was a lesson.

Whitney and OBX Dave teamed up on a series about late, lamented dive bars.

Langston Hughes made what is likely his first appearance here.

The Triumphant Return of the Ghoogles.

Closed out a strange, sad month with our first celebration of Negro League baseball.

July

Strong month for Whitney, in what was a strong year by our post player. (Get it?) The month was anchored by a most unusual and definitely welcome OBFT, which we chronicled in pictures. The crowd was smaller and grayer than usual, but the effort was undeniable.

We kicked the month off with our first Gheorghasbord of the year.

"Don't Take Your Foot Off the Gas". Life lessons from Whitney.

Here's the aforementioned OBFT in visual form.

Rest in Power, John Lewis.

TR's kid is a good man.

A story of connections, youth, sadness, crowdsourcing, and humanity.

R.I.P. Dave Fairbank.

The Teej opened the Vhault. And there were cereal mascots within.

My daughter left the nest. And I had feelings about it.

August

After a string of relatively low-energy months, postcountally speaking, we began to ramp it up in August, mustering 22 mostly forgettable but entertaining in the moment efforts.

We started with the definitive ranking of the top five logos in American sports. As predicted, Minnesota United got the dub.

There's a bigger point to TR's mini-essay about slaughtering lethargic flies, but I can't quite connect the dots.

Oskar Blues made a mustard beer. For the love of all that's holy, that needs to stop.

Whit got wistful about his little girl. Been there, appreciate that.

Cooley.

Buck O'Neil, Gheorghie as fuck.

Whit has found him a home.

Zman had ideas about COVID-19. They were interesting, but they didn't age all that well. 

SVP, homecoming, and Trouble Funk.

September

We cranked it up to 25 posts in September, and if I say it was an eclectic month, I'd be doing a disservice to eccentric. Three compelling think pieces from OBX Dave, Whitney's 50th birthday, and extended run of silly homemade 'art', and a month-closing run of music-based filler.

The month got off to a rocking start as we released new singles by both Les Coole and Greasetruck. The former was set to autoplay, and thus annoying as fuck every time I opened G:TB. No offense, Les.

A post about the WNBA logo led to a series of posts that culminated in the long-awaited design of Gheorghe: The Logo. Which in turn became Gheorghe: The Blog: The T-Shirt, thanks to Rootsy.

Civil War generals as Muppets, a definitive thread.

"A cornerstone of newspapering is being able to humanize the day’s activities."

Our Ombhudsman Could Kick Your Ombudsman's Ass.

COVID came way too close to home for the G:TB family.

TR and I posted videos of our dogs doing dog things. Big year for canines at G:TB.

First guestie from King Juan Carlos, who taught us how to make a Negroni.

When historians stumble upon G:TB, the juxtaposition of this piece on income inequality by OBX Dave with funk filler, Negroni recipes and dog videos will lead to some interesting conclusions about our time.

Smells Like Van Spirit.

October

Strong, strong month for TR, and in general for all of us. 25 more posts in the year's tenth month, marking our highest two-month output since February/March 2015. You kids have been putting in the work.

Z kicked us off with Rootsy's WCSAGD, which is bitchin'.

Road Warrior Animal passed, and with him a bit of TR's youth.

"When a parrot tells you to 'fuck off' it amuses people very highly. It's brought a big smile to a really hard year."

More about TR's youth, a chapter on Dave Winfield.

And here he is again with a story about how Van Halen made him realize he liked girls.

WCSAGD and real life collide.

Whit finished The Wire. Finally.

Saved by the Bell, back.

My baby kidlet communicated with me. In her own way.

Original Dave posted for the one of the very few times in 2020, a doozy of a scary poem.

November

We slowed it down in November, probably because we were so flabbergasted that Fairbank finally figured out how to post by himself. 20 posts in total, grappling with electoral anxiety in the beginning of the month and the reality that this fucking pandemic ain't going anywhere by the end.

More zShazams!

A beautiful post by Danimal connecting death, life, and cats.

Election Day anxiety open thread.

G:TB on the John Fetterman for President bandwagon early. Remember where you heard it first.

Supertankers of Guano, an Exploration of America.

Garden variety Gheorghasbord, all-time headline: Great Tits in Crisis.

Dave Fairbank finally posted without training wheels. Big day.

Hand of God, in the hands of God.

And the final Wrenball of the year, in which we're skeptical of...lots of things.

It's a tradition in this space that I wax philosophical about how this weird little electronic meeting place carries with it real meaning. That it's a recurring bit makes it no less true, especially this year. We've been at this for 17 years now, and I daresay we've all got enough going on in our lives that we wouldn't do it if it didn't bring us joy and camaraderie and community. And so I thank you, Gheorghies, for your time and creativity and humor and insight. You're the best, you magnificent bastards.