Tuesday, September 23, 2025

Family Truckster!

Some lunatic genius in Alberta, Canada took a 1989 Ford LTD Crown Victoria Wagon and turned it into a Family Truckster.


Predictably, it's up for auction at BringaTrailer and it closes today.  I have no idea what the right number is for this monstrosity beauty but I will not be surprised if FoGTB DB wins it.

via GIPHY

A few other choice auctions that are within reach and end today include a 1990 300ZX Twin Turbo for Mark, a 1974 Fiat Jolly for our man at the beach, a very cheap and very shady 2014 Jaguar F-Type right here in NJ for rob, a 2004 VW R32 for rob's kid, a Laguna Blue (!!) 2001 BMW M Roadster in Acton, MA that Squeaky needs to buy right now (even the dreaded spot welds in the trunk look good), an Assuan Brown 1982 Volkswagen Westfalia with striped (not Boogie Woogie, sigh) fabric seats for rootsy, a Yellow Mist 1965 Mercury Comet Caliente Convertible for Whit, a remarkably crisp 1973 TR6 for Mr. KQ, and a 1972 350SL for Marls.

Monday, September 22, 2025

More Beast Food, alternatively titled "Trump has more housecleaning to do"

The Eastern District of Virginia is a district within the federal court system with courthouses in Alexandria, Newport News, Norfolk, and Richmond.  DJ Trump nominated Erik Siebert to be the US attorney for the Eastern District in May of 2025.  Shortly thereafter, Siebert launched an investigation into New York Attorney General Letitia James--you may remember her from the fraud case against Trump that resulted in a $450 million verdict--but he was unable to find any wrongdoing.  Naturally, Trump pressured Siebert to press charges against her anyway.  Trump opined that "It looks to me like she is very guilty of something, but I really don't know."  That's the leader of the free world, by the way.

Shortly thereafter, Trump decided to fire him but Siebert withdrew his nomination before he could be fired.  When explaining why he wanted to fire Siebert, Trump said "When I saw that he got approved by those two men, I said, pull it, because he can't be any good.  When I learned that they voted for him, I said, I don't really want him."  So it had nothing to do with Letitia James.

"Those two men" are Senators Tim Kaine and Mark Warner.  I know this because Trump later bleated on Truth Social "Today I withdrew the Nomination of Erik Siebert as U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia, when I was informed that he received the UNUSUALLY STRONG support of the two absolutely terrible, sleazebag Democrat Senators, from the Great State of Virginia. Next time let him go in as a Democrat, not a Republican."

This makes sense to me.  But this also means Trump has a lot of housecleaning to do because Kaine and Warner voted for a bunch of other people Trump nominated.  Like Marco Rubio, Doug Burgum, Scott Bessent, John Ratcliffe, and Sean Duffy (really?).  He better get to work replacing those untrustworthy RINOS!  Unless, of course, he really wanted to fire Siebert because Siebert wouldn't press charges against James.  But Trump couldn't really be that corrupt and pettycould he?

via GIPHY

Friday, September 19, 2025

Feeding The Beast

American society continues a headlong march toward a performative nadir where nothing occurs that’s so terrible that it can’t be made worse. Tragic as the killing of conservative activist Charlie Kirk was, it prompted an even more dispiriting response: excessive praise and punishment among the commentariat; elevation of a documented shit-stirring influencer to martyr status; further crankiness and middle fingers between right and left. 

Facts and truth took hits in the immediate aftermath of Kirk’s assassination, as you knew they would, because reporting takes time, and ideology abhors a vacuum. Kirk supporters wanted to push a narrative of who and what the shooter must represent before he was apprehended or even identified. Once it became clear that the alleged killer didn’t quite fit the desired profile, it required more work and massaging, which continues apace. 

In the days since Kirk’s death, he’s been hailed by conservatives as a patriot, a visionary, a champion of free speech, a good Christian, a role model. President Trump called him “a great guy from top to bottom” and referred to him as “even Legendary.” Sen. Ted Cruz tweeted an illustration of Kirk being hugged by Jesus. FBI director Kash Patel ended a press briefing on the investigation with, “Rest now, brother. We have the watch and I’ll see you in Valhalla,” a peculiar bit of macho, military-tinged posturing, given that neither of them served in the armed forces. Vice President J.D. Vance provided Air Force Two to transport Kirk’s family after his death and hosted Kirk’s podcast. 

Meanwhile, critics have been equally quick to condemn Kirk for his views on numerous topics such as civil rights, immigration, gun violence and affirmative action. Dozens of people have been suspended or fired from jobs for insensitive remarks and social media posts that offered no sympathy for his passing and even celebrated his death, though in some cases people were reprimanded or terminated for merely highlighting Kirk’s statements and the period in which we live. [We commend to your attention this typically spot-on piece from Ta-Nehisi Coates on Kirk.]

For instance, veteran MSNBC political commentator Matthew Dowd, a man who has worked with both Republicans and Democrats, was asked about the current political climate. He responded that Kirk “has been one of the most divisive, especially divisive younger figures in this, who is constantly sort of pushing this sort of hate speech or sort of aimed at certain groups. … Hateful thoughts lead to hateful words” which then “lead to hateful actions. … I think that’s the environment we are in. You can’t stop with these sort of awful thoughts you have and then saying these awful words and not expect awful actions to take place.” MSNBC dropped him like a hot rock, even after he attempted to clarify his remarks and apologized for the tone. 

Delta, United Airlines and American Airlines sanctioned pilots who they said posted inappropriate comments about Kirk’s death. Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy said they should be fired. A Secret Service agent was placed on administrative leave and his security clearance revoked after he posted: “If you are Mourning this guy … delete me. He spewed hate and racism on his show.” Defense Secretary (or War Secretary, if you prefer) Pete Hegseth instructed staff to identify service members and those associated with the Pentagon who have mocked or condoned the killing online. A Wisconsin teacher posted that she disagreed with Kirk’s stance that gun deaths are worth it for the Second Amendment. The local Congressman threatened to revoke all Federal funding for the town unless the situation was “rectified” immediately. Teachers in Virginia and Texas risk having their certifications pulled for “inappropriate” remarks about Kirk’s death, though it’s unclear what qualifies. ABC's parent company shelved Jimmy Kimmel's late-night talk show indefinitely after right-wing critics took issue with his remarks and the FCC threatened action. 

This smarmy knob
Kimmel didn't criticize Kirk himself, but said in a monologue, “We hit some new lows over the weekend with the MAGA gang desperately trying to characterize this kid who murdered Charlie Kirk as anything other than one of them, and doing everything they can to score political points from it.” FCC chair Brendan Carr, a Trump appointee, said on a podcast, "... We can do this the easy way or the hard way. These companies can find ways to change conduct and take action, frankly, on Kimmel, or there’s going to be additional work for the FCC ahead.” 

Look, teachers and those with public platforms should be judicious, if not steer clear, when discussing hot-button topics. Private employers absolutely have the right to sanction or fire employees if their actions or social media presence are an affront to either the boss or the business. But this present Kirkification feels more like a loyalty test or a check on who gets to say what, disguised as a call for civility and respectful discourse. 

The Disruptor-in-Chief continues to bang the drum that the “radical left” is responsible for the violence and what he called “the terrorism that we’re seeing in our country today.” He conveniently omits the shooting and killing of Minnesota Democratic legislators in June or the home attack against former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s husband, plus the fact that neither Thomas Crooks, the 20-year-old who attempted to assassinate him in July, or Tyler Robinson, Kirk’s alleged killer, fall short of any standard of supposedly radicalized leftists. Trump and Vance have vowed to go after liberal and left-leaning institutions that they say promote and fund violence, with Kirk’s death as cover. 

As to the calls for civility and respectful discourse, I’m old enough to remember a certain African-American occupant of the White House and his family were frequently subject to vile and racist rhetoric, often dressed up as simple political opposition. Adversaries cloaked themselves in Gadsden flags and seized on Jefferson’s quote: “The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants.” (never mind that the quote is often taken out of context and employed to the user’s convenience) In other words, violence toward *my* stated goal is justified, but violence toward *your* goal is unacceptable. Substitute “words and actions” for “violence” in the previous sentence, and that pretty much describes our politics, if not our society. Magical time to be alive, ain’t it?

Wednesday, September 17, 2025

Gheorghasbord: Spanning the Globe

In which I chronicle various oddities in an increasingly futile effort to block out the immensely insane fuckery loosed upon the land.

Did you know that Phil Hartman was an accomplished album cover designer? Neither did I. Freelance arts writer Conor Herbert recently wrote a detailed piece examining Hartman's pre-fame, indeed pre-comedy work as a graphic designer. Hartman designed more than 40 covers, including this one from Poco.

In news of an entirely different sort, connected to Hartman only via Canada, here's a headline you might enjoy:

It was 9:00 am in Prince George, British Columbia on Friday, September 8, and the Royal Canadian Mounted Police were in no mood for shenanigans. When they got word of a grown-ass man driving down the road in a pink Barbie Jeep, they swung into action.

“While it might seem to some to be an inefficient use of police time to pull over a driver in a toy car, the risk the driver was creating to other motorists on the road who were forced to go around him, coupled with the risk to himself as other drivers are not in the habit of looking for toy cars on the busy road, was enough to warrant police attention.”

Dudley Do-Right, on the case.

And finally, a brief and entirely inadequate appreciation of the end of an era. Last week, Ray Hudson announced his retirement from broadcasting, ending more than 50 years in soccer as a player, coach, and one of the all-time greats in the booth. We celebrated him at least once, which isn't nearly enough for one of the singular voices in the sport.

If you've got a few minutes, give this compilation of Hudson's calls a listen. It'll perk you right up. Magisterial!

Monday, September 15, 2025

Serving the Public...Drinks

One week ago today, our ongoing investigation into odd food shit led us to ISCO Spirits' Pizza Vodka. I suggested that the next of us to visit Providence, RI should pick up a bottle or three for sampling purposes.

A few hours after that post dropped, our man Marls texted me a picture of a receipt - that lunatic went out and ordered a bottle. And so our investigation began. 

I had a nice block of Parmesan cheese in my fridge, and went to the market and purchased a jar of pepperoncini. Marls commenced to making tomato water - tastes like summer. My wife bought new glassware - any excuse to buy stuff. All we needed was an occasion. Turns out we'd already made plans to have dinner because FOG:TB Cricket was in town, and the stars aligned Friday evening.

We tried two of the recipes from ISCO's website: the Caprese Martini, and the Italian Stallion shot. Here's Marls pouring the former:

The Caprese Martini includes the aforementioned tomato water and a couple of dashes of balsamic vinegar. Which gave us an excellent excuse to break out the vinegar my wife and I bought at Poggio ai Laghi, a winery in Monteriggiano, Italy we visited in December. It's spectacular. 

I digress.

Marls garnished the martinis with some seasoned mozzarella balls and served us. The verdict: a darn tasty savory sip, with notes of oregano and a bit of a briny flavor. Even a non-vodka fan like me enjoyed it.


We finished our pre-dinner tasting with a shot. The Italian Stallion is simple. It's a shot of pizza vodka. The accoutrements make the drink. Start by loading your hand with grated Parm, in the manner of salt for a tequila shot. Make sure you've got a pepperoncini close at hand. Eat the cheese, down the shot, eat the pepperoncini. It's a pretty cool combination - the spicy little pepper makes it.

So in the final analysis, this particular Food is Dumb episode ends with a nod to the purveyor. Well done, ISCO - we'll see you again.

Friday, September 12, 2025

Carolina Blew?

We are likely months, if not years, from conclusions about the University of North Carolina’s L’Affaire Belichick. Certainly, there’s plenty to discuss already, but early results have done little except confirm the football program’s nondescript status within the sport’s hierarchy, albeit now with a much larger spotlight. 

Such is the case when a school with a modest football history goes off script and pays exorbitant sums to hire one of the sport’s most accomplished coaches, a guy with six Super Bowl rings who is also 73 years old and had never coached a minute in college. Oh, and with an attractive, opportunistic, sensitive-to-scrutiny girlfriend almost 50 years his junior in tow. 

But hype is hype, and in a quest for football relevance, several UNC Big Checkbooks circumvented the regular hiring process and went back-channel to recruit Coach Hoodie, with the promise of big money and full control of the program. Their throw-weight prevailed, and the administration signed off. Wholesale staff and roster makeover ensued and enthusiasm within the fan base spiked, accompanied by national curiosity about how it all would play out. 

The Tar Heels’ opener, a 48-14 nationally televised home dump trucking by TCU, exposed them as miles away from their stated goal of championships and illustrated that it doesn’t matter who’s wearing the Big Headset if players are lacking or don’t perform. Last weekend’s 20-3 win against Charlotte, a meh American Athletic Conference program, provided little evidence of progress. Upcoming games against FCS Richmond and Central Florida, a middlin’ Big 12 opponent (hard to keep up with who’s where these days, ain’t it?) in its own reset won’t reveal much. 

UNC’s next “test” comes Oct. 4 versus Clemson in its ACC opener. Meanwhile, former NFL scout and now snoop and take-haver John Middlekauf first reported last week that Belichick banned New England Patriots scouts. Belichick confirmed the report and responded that since he’s banned from the Pats’ facility, they’re banned from UNC’s facility. 

It’s a remarkably pissy move aimed at owner Bob Kraft, particularly considering that the Patriots are coached by one of his former players, Mike Vrabel. Subsequent reporting by ESPN and others reveal that other NFL team scouts are only permitted to watch limited practice time and that NFL personnel may talk only to the Tar Heels’ pro liaison and will have “zero access” to Belichick and his assistants. It’s an interesting tack for a program and staff trying to attract talent by touting their NFL bonafides and ability to prepare players for the pros. 

Belichick’s college and UNC pivot have also revived discussion in some corners about where he resides in the coaching pantheon. It seems ridiculous to question the chops of a guy with a fistful of rings and the second-most wins in NFL history. But he was sub-.500 in Cleveland in his first head coaching stint and sub-.500 in New England after Tom Brady departed. 

The Belichick-Brady pairing and its role in the Patriots dynasty was a chicken-and-egg question for a long time. The Patriots’ and Belichick’s 29-38 record in the four years after Brady decamped for Tampa and won a Super Bowl may have tilted the discussion in the quarterback’s favor, especially as it pertains to their latter years in Foxboro. 

Speaking of poor general managers, Chapel
Hill ties, and money
I think it’s beyond dispute that Belichick is a great coach who was a poor general manager and offensive unit assembler, which led to substandard records and Kraft cutting the cord in 2023. His desire for full control likely figured into the rest of the league taking a pass when a guy who’s getting a bust in Canton became available. In Belichick’s year away, he got a whiff of the college coaching and campus experience through his son, Steve, and his compadres and enjoyed it greatly. And then several guys with Chapel Hill ties and money and grand ideas of UNC football’s potential reach dovetailed with an unemployed Big Whistle convinced he still has tread on the tires, and here we are. 

He could have kept a foot in the game on a smaller stage, and probably earned handsome side money, as a consultant and clinician. But the opportunity to run a show and receive eight figures annually to do so scratched an itch. At this point, it's probably fair to ask: So, where are you going with this, Sparky? It’s a valid question and I’m not sure I have a good answer. 

I guess the larger point is that for all the analysis and opinions and snark that every game and move and press conference remark prompt, for all the skepticism about novice Chapel Bill in a wildly unsettled college landscape, we’re nowhere near a reasonable judgment and may not be for several years. The Belichick Experiment could succeed; it could flame out spectacularly or fizzle meekly (my money is on the latter). The man’s body of work invites a level of attention that far exceeds the pace of the work itself and the task at hand, which is unsatisfying in an impatient society that frequently demands immediate returns. The risk and financial outlay certainly merit accountability and some measures of improvement along the way – for both Belichick and those who instigated his arrival – but it’s not necessarily wise to permit the audience to dictate terms.

Wednesday, September 10, 2025

I am fit as a goddam fiddle, alternatively titled "The Streak Redux"

Almost four years ago I touted my Peloton purchase in a Gheorghemas post.  I have continued to use it regularly and although I haven't been able to drop my weight significantly below 169 pounds (and really, why would I want to) I am fit as a goddam fiddle.  I routinely crank out rides of 11-13 kJ per minute (Danimal scoffs at that) and work up a mighty sweat but cool down in about five minutes.  When I'm not doing rides I'm lifting weights or doing yoga.  Not heavy weights or good yoga, but I'm trying (I hate lifting weights).  If I'm away from home I'll do a run on the hotel treadmill or even outside (!) on the street.  I have convinced myself that this shit is fun, worthwhile, and too expensive to collect dust in the basement.

So thorough is this self-inflicted Jedi mind trick that yesterday I completed my 365th day in a row of doing at least one Peloton activity.  A streak, if you will.  rob's wife streaked with me.  She also participated in the ride I took to make the streak one year long. 

Some of you will remember my last streak which ran sometime during the spring semester of 1996 when I went after Buck's house record for most consecutive nights out.  This was a streak of an entirely different tone and tenor than my current health kick.  Eventually I broke the record, and when I saw Buck I told him so.  He replied "I don't remember setting a record like that" which means his streak destroyed his memory or he was full of shit when he told an impressionable freshman about his drinking exploits.

Unlike my streak of 1996, I feel no pressure with this one.  In fact I feel good!  I'm not keeping it alive just to say I did, I'm enjoying myself.  I'm sure this streak will come to an end but it won't be a relief when it does.

Monday, September 08, 2025

Food Back On Its Bullshit?

I don't know why this topic has taken up so much of my blog-related mental space of late, but the universe really seems to be tilting gustatorily at the moment. This one's a doozy.

Rhode Island-based ISCO Spirits has an inventive portfolio and a sustainable mission. As the distiller says on its website, "Our spirits are fiercely unique, land-and-ocean-inspired and handcrafted." Their Seaflow Ocean Gin is made with local seaweed and oysters in addition to the juniper you might expect. They offer an everything bagel aquavit, for chrissakes.

Those tempting tipples have nothing on their newest limited release. Friends, I give you ISCO Pizza Vodka. It's made with 100% organic wheat, tomatoes, pizza spices, and fresh, gooey mozzarella cheese. Bloomberg spirits columnist Kara Newman tasted it, and came away impressed, saying "It didn’t disappoint: The clear liquid has a big, tomato-y scent and oregano-forward flavor and a mouthwatering, garlicky exhale. (Seriously; keep a breath mint in your back pocket.) Put all together, it really does taste uncannily like a saucy slice."

The good folks at ISCO, who I now want to hang out with, offer some cocktail ideas for what they claim is the world's first pizza vodka. Again from their website, "From Italian Stallion Shots (like a tequila shot with all Italian ingredients), to Pizza Luges, to upscale savory Caprese martinis and clarified Hawaiian Milk Punches, Pizza Vodka can be dressed. up or down just like the versatile food on which it is based. Perfect for dive bars to Michelin stars and everything in between!"

Indeed, the Italian Stallion sounds delicious: Pour 1 oz. of Pizza Vodka into a shot glass, wet your hand as you might for salt in a tequila shot, shake shredded Parmesan cheese on your hand, lick the cheese, drink the shot, chase with a pepperoncini. I'm not a vodka fan, but that might change things for me.

Whoever gets to Providence next, grab a couple bottles. At $30, they're a bargain. Salud!

Friday, September 05, 2025

Breaking Music News

In a series of posts on Bluesky last night, R.E.M. frontman Michael Stipe ended decades of speculation by revealing the lyrics to 'It's the End of the World as We Know It (and I Feel Fine)'. Over to you, Mike:

Ok its ‘feed it off an aux, speak, grunt no strength, the ladder start to clatter with fear fight down height, wire in a fire representing seven games, a government for hire and a combat site’.

— Michael Stipe (@michaelstipe.bsky.social) September 5, 2025 at 12:13 AM

The entire thread is a hoot, including this reveal about 'Chronic Town', 'Murmur', and 'Reckoning':

Any other lyrics— don’t even try chronic town murmur or reckoning btw— just form vowels and syllables, and mean it

— Michael Stipe (@michaelstipe.bsky.social) September 3, 2025 at 9:55 AM

It's the end of the mystery as we know it. And I feel fine.


Wednesday, September 03, 2025

Food is...Getting Smarter?

In which we both appreciate a blessed snack combination and an authentic American personality.

Mike Golic Junior faced at least mild criticism early in his career owing to his Nepo Baby path to prominence at ESPN. His father is beloved by many as a happy go lucky fat defensive lineman turned svelte radio and television personality. Junior unquestionably benefited from his dad's notoriety as one half of the legendary Mike & Mike morning show, making some of his first public appearances on the program.

But if Junior was all nepo, he'd have faded away over time. Instead, he's become a unique and talented voice, capable of breaking down offensive line play (he played at Notre Dame before being waived by the Pittsburgh Steelers in camp) and Taylor Swift lyrics with equal authority. He can do professional color commentary on a college football game and poke fun of himself with aplomb. He's made a point of supporting female broadcasters like Jessica Smetana and Chiney Ogwumike. He says shit like this, "There are always two different ways to go about everything - you're either so talented that people can't deny it, or you're willing to come in, work, and be a great teammate. I always thought, let me make sure I leave everyone I work with as best as I can." 

And more directly relevant to this post, he's an unabashed lover of food, especially gooey, greasy, snacky stuff. 

Recently, he dropped this review:

I think he'd be fun at a G:TB summit.