Thursday, May 28, 2020

Corona Files: Strange Bedfellows

We've been way out in front of the slow-motion crumbling of the edifice of collegiate athletics since at least last Thursday. Today, we go down a few levels, plumbing the depths of both the NCAA ladder and our readership's patience. Our OBX correspondent will try below to convince you that the Christopher Newport Captains will soon participate in the same league as the University of California Santa Cruz Banana Slugs. I've also asked him to feel free to send my some of that good, good Corolla kush. For medicinal purposes, obviously - still working my way back from these herniated discs.

I’ll try to keep this brief, since it involves small college athletics in my little corner of the world, and you are a diverse and widespread group that likely doesn’t give a blue fig about small college athletics or the school in question. On its face, however, this item pins the bizarre-o-meter.

Christopher Newport University, located in Newport News, Va., successfully competes in Division III athletics as a member of the Capital Athletic Conference. The CAC is a small, regional collection of schools – until Tuesday. The league announced that it will add six schools for the coming year: two in California, one each in Michigan, Wisconsin, New York and Massachusetts.

At a time when colleges are shuttering programs and whacking expenses amid a pandemic, a Division III conference that stretches from Virginia and Maryland to the upper Midwest to California appears batshit crazy.

As usual, there’s more to it. The move is an administrative necessity to preserve NCAA guidelines for  members to earn conference championships and NCAA championship bids. The CAC has been shedding schools for the past couple of years, and will do so again after 2021. If membership falls below a certain number of schools, conferences lose automatic NCAA bids for their champions. Earning NCAA berths becomes far more difficult as an independent or at-large entry in Division III, which has more than 440 colleges nationally and whose tournament fields typically are smaller than in Division I.

Now, logically you still might wonder why Christopher Newport couldn’t simply align with more geographically compatible mates in Virginia, the Land of 1,000 Tuitions. The problem is that nearly all of the Division III schools in Virginia are small and private. Indeed, 80 percent of the nation’s Division III schools are private. Many regional leagues view CNU, with its public status, enrollment of almost 5,000 students, and D3 upper-tier athletic facilities as philosophically incompatible with their schools. They want no part of admitting a school whose standards and emphasis they think, accurately or not, do not match their own and would make them a perennial contender in darn near every sport.

So Christopher Newport had to get creative. There will be no traditional conference regular season schedules, for obvious reasons – distance and cost. CNU will likely play nearby conference schools Mary Washington and Salisbury (Md.) multiple times during the season. There will be limited conference tournaments in most sports, at pre-determined sites. Absent traditional round-robin scheduling, tournament seeding often will be done by computer. Scheduling will be a challenge, because CNU will have to wangle more non-conference opponents who are in the midst of their conference seasons.

It ain’t perfect, but it preserves the athletic department’s competitive aims. And on the plus side, CNU is now in a league with UC Santa Cruz. Can’t be all bad with the Banana Slugs.

40 comments:

Marls said...

One of the schools, Pine Manor, is being absorbed by BC at the end of next year. As for the other schools:

“Mills is a women-only school in Oakland and competes in just cross country, rowing, soccer, swimming, tennis and volleyball. Mount Mary is a women-only school in Milwaukee. Pratt is a provisional member of NCAA Division III. Of the six schools, only Finlandia and UC Santa Cruz offer men's and women's sports and will be members of the conference in 2021-22.”

The additions appear the the the airmen Cecil and O’Malley of DIII athletics.

zman said...

Because they killed Santiago?

rob said...

because they killed the sports programs at the university of chile santiago

Marls said...

Where in the world is Chile Santiago?

rob said...

that sequel would've been more successful but for the scandal

zman said...

He's with Chili Davis.

rob said...

she might be a she

TR said...

Mount Mary. Nice.

TR said...

When I had training exercises for Army ROTC, we did them jointly with Christopher Newport College (pre-expansion to university). Their cadets were mostly husbands/dads in their mid 20’s who were former enlisted soldiers. Not a lot in common b/w them and 19 y/o me.

Marls said...

Nice job killing the mediocre comedy flow, Clara. Jerk.

rob said...

during my single inglorious semester in rotc, we did an exercise where our ragtag band of college dipshits stormed a beach that was protected by a detachment of marines from one of the local installations. we picked them up in our bus on the way to the exercise site. they were very impressed by our erudition and military acumen.

Whitney said...

Clara used "colour" -- is she British, Canadian, or pompous?

Whitney said...

Did a little googlin on clarabenet90. First return was this.

https://riyria.blogspot.com/2020/01/multi-author-winter-fantasy-sale.html

And man, do the comments there take a hard left turn! I can't tell if the implication is that Clara is a hussy or not.

rootsminer said...

Wow. Those comments do take quite a turn. I wonder if people ever end up in the comments section here by chance, and what their interpretation would be. The 'still dicking bimbos' comment thread was a doozy, as I recall.

Squeaky said...

Pine Manor is referred to as Pine Mattress up here, or was back in the 90's. Surprised Wellesley College isn't on this list.

Marls said...

Based on those comments, maybe Jimmy V was talking about herpes.

Whitney said...

Yeahhh, Squeaky. Pine Manor seems like a fine place for those folks who are sdb.

Whitney said...

Here's the thread Rootsy mentioned.

https://gheorghe77.blogspot.com/2016/09/whitneys-back.html

Whitney said...

For any of you who enjoyed the Norfolk music venue The Boathouse before its demise in 2003, a new article just came out about it.

https://veermag.com/2020/05/tbt-remembering-norfolks-boathouse-music-venue/?fbclid=IwAR1a3gBsWuLoUjF4YQJr3sq3sOnzY6hJrJqG-ULPm2YbWrTczfxrrzaAvT0

rob said...

that thread is goddamn genius. when we write gheorghe: the book, that'll be a chapter.

rob said...

that ramones show was awesome

zman said...

I saw Black Sheep, James, and the Soup Dragons at the Boathouse. It was a good venue.

rob said...

i saw the bodeans, connells (several times), hoodoo gurus, new potato caboose, waxing poetics, and probably a couple of others there.

rob said...

and the violent femmes filmed one of their videos there.

rob said...

actually, the femmes recorded an entire show there: https://www.discogs.com/Violent-Femmes-Permanent-Record-Live-Otherwise/release/729937

TR said...

Nice multi-family beach day w/ Ian and his crew today. Good to see a familiar face, even if it’s from a distance.

rob said...

the mayor of minneapolis is a 2004 graduate of the college of william and mary. he’s impressive. and i wouldn’t want his job right now.

Whitney said...

Hey to Ian

mr kq said...

Saw the Femmes open for The Pogues at Wolftrap in ‘89. Was there with the rugger crew. ‘‘Twas a night.

rootsminer said...

I saw Widespread Panic at the Boathouse with Brady, Brad Branscome and a a buddy of mine who came up from Hampden Sydney for the show. We jumped the gun on some fungus treats, which started coming on as we were rolling through a tunnel in Brad's mustang while listening to Elvis. A weird trip.

zman said...

Was that Troy or did he go to Georgia Tech? Troy and Brad Branscome would be an interesting hangout.

rootsminer said...

Troy went to Ga Tech. He lived in Richmond for awhile after he graduated, so I got to witness him have that "I'm not in college anymore, but wish I were" experience in Williamsburg. He was also my wingman to pick my brother up from the York County jail at 6 am the day before my graduation. We laughed our asses off when we saw him sitting in the little holding cell with his uneaten, unappetizing breakfast in front of him.

Whitney said...

It’s “Jeter Weekend” on the MLB Channel. I’m sure rob will be eagerly tuning in.

zman said...

I heard that every weekend is Jeter Weekend at rob's house.

rob said...

dropkick murphys playing fenway live on youtube right now. gonna watch that on repeat instead of captain intangibles.

Whitney said...

Isn't Springsteen playing with them?

Mark said...

Just rewatched USA-Spain 2008 Gold Medal game. That was high level basketball.

Mark said...

Also, meant to mention these two nuggets last night.

I played against Christopher Newport multiple times when I was at Chowan. Also played against Newport News Apprentice.

Went to one show at The Boathouse during this time as well. Tool. Fucking epic.

TR said...

Tool at Boathouse = wow.

Taxi Driver just started on AXS. May keep me up later than I wanted.

Whitney said...

https://www.npr.org/sections/allsongs/2020/05/29/864470936/stream-over-100-shows-from-the-9-30-club

100 Shows from the 9:30 Club in DC between 2005 and 2017 streamed (audio) from NPR.

I didn’t see the 2008 Wilco show here, but I saw them twice in New Orleans and once with Squeaker in a pool in Brooklyn that same year. Apex.