|Belgian Midfielder Mousa|
Mousa Dembele is a 28 year-old Belgian* central midfielder who's made 102 starts for Spurs since 2012. Prior to that, he played for Fulham, making him an instant G:TB favorite. It was during his
time at Fulham that manager Martin Jol said, "Dembele is probably the best player on the ball I have ever seen." To be fair, that kind of judgment is likely what got Jol shitcanned after failing miserably to keep the Cottagers from being relegated two years ago.
(* How many of you knew that Belgium is currently the number one team in the FIFA World Rankings? It's thought that shots on goal are part of that calculation, and the Red Devils' 68 shots against the U.S. and Tim Howard in the 2014 World Cup contributing to their position.)
Not satisfied with one Mous(s)a Dembele, Tottenham management made a bold move this week, signing forward Moussa Dembele from...Fulham. This Dembele is a 19 year-old Frenchman who's tallied 11 goals for a middling (this is a very kind description) Fulham side that's barely above the Championship relegation zone.
|French Striker Moussa|
Maybe they should reach out to Moussa Dembele, who competed in the 110-meter hurdles for Senegal in the 2012 Olympics. He's only 27 years old, and he's fast as hell. No idea if he can kick a soccer ball or not, but how can Spurs go wrong with three Moussi Dembele?
They can't, that's how.
To close this shitshow of punnery, please enjoy a little Bob Marley while I tell you that Spurs are going to finish in the top four and make it to Champions League play next year. I believe I've already told you that, but I'm too lazy to look it up.