...I knew Andy MacPhail was gone, I knew the Tribune Co. is traditionally know for being thrifty, and yet who so far has been the biggest spender in the annually overhyped Hot Stove season? The Chicago Cubs, that's who. It's almost like GM Jim Hendry HAS to spend this money...
$1,500,000 for SP Wade Miller
$1,750,000 for RP Kerry Wood
$5,250,000 for C Henry Blanco
$13,000,000 for 2B/SS/3B/OF Mark DeRosa
$75,000,000 for 3B Aramis Ramirez
$136,000,000 for LF Alfonso Soriano
That's $232,500,000 right there. I couldn't quite figure it out. Was Hendry really behind this tremendous cash outlay? Was the Tribune Co. finally going to sell the Cubs, meaning the penny pinching was over? Finally, it came to me...there is only one man truly capable of blowing that much cash that fast. I give you the REAL man behind the Chicago Cubs offseason:
$1,500,000 for SP Wade Miller
$1,750,000 for RP Kerry Wood
$5,250,000 for C Henry Blanco
$13,000,000 for 2B/SS/3B/OF Mark DeRosa
$75,000,000 for 3B Aramis Ramirez
$136,000,000 for LF Alfonso Soriano
That's $232,500,000 right there. I couldn't quite figure it out. Was Hendry really behind this tremendous cash outlay? Was the Tribune Co. finally going to sell the Cubs, meaning the penny pinching was over? Finally, it came to me...there is only one man truly capable of blowing that much cash that fast. I give you the REAL man behind the Chicago Cubs offseason:
"Gentlemen, do you think I'm a lowlife?"
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28 comments:
Tomax and Xamot wouldn't have got caught:
DeKALB, Ill. -- Wisconsin cornerback Jack Ikegwuonu and his twin brother, who plays for Northern Illinois, are accused of breaking into an off-campus apartment and trying to steal an Xbox game console, authorities said Thursday.
Is UConn the youngest team in the country? It's all freshman and sophomores for Calhoun (their 1 junior and 1 senior have manged to "play" 2combined minutes the entire year).
Probably, but UNC isn't far behind.
nor is ohio state
teej - nice job on the brewster's millions. i'm expecting a deadspin cite.
Only if Will appreciates some rock solid 80's cheese...
As to college hoops teams, I have always bought into the "veteran squads go farther in March" theory, though I was very happy with what Melo and Gerry did for 'Cuse in 2003.
the fab five say hi
I'm sorry, what did they win? Oh right, absolutely nothing.
In fact, Ray Jackson was my toll booth collector on the NJ Turnpike.
Jake Peavy for Manny Ramirez? Discuss.
The Wiz are going to need Mr. Arenas to step it up...
In Washington's five wins, Gilbert Arenas averaged 35.8 points and 6.8 assists while shooting 53.7 percent from the field and 55.3 percent from three-point range.
In the nine losses, Arenas averaged 20.4 points and 6.3 assists, shooting 29.9 percent from the field and 28.8 percent from three-point range.
Those stats aren't awful, except perhaps for the overall FG%. The man needs some help on the court. Who's going to give it to him, YOU, Lieutenant Weindoyle?
I just went to SportGuy's latest and it opened:
"You couldn't even call the Eastern Conference an apocalypse -- it's more like a poopocalypse."
I stopped there. TJ's dumbest quips are better than that.
It sure as hell won't be DeShawn Stevenson.
Or Antonio Daniels or Jarvis Hayes or, stop me anytime now...
Since Whitney didn't read Sports Guy, I'm calling out TJ for lifting his Jimmy King line and applying it to Ray Jackson.
Also, if Ray Jackson was your toll booth collector (Seriously, get EZ pass already you curmudgeon) then that would infer that Ray can count, add and subtract. Those assumptions are doubtful, at best.
my bad. i assumed making it to the championship game constituted 'going farther in march'. consider me suitably chastened.
i'm spitting in your burger on tuesday.
Rob, I want a liter of Cola.
Mark, guilty as charged, but I have been doing Ray Jackson "insert menial job" jokes for a while now.
There is a nice rip job of Scoop Jackson going on over at Deadspin/YAY Sports. Apparently, Scoop has a bad case of Cowherditis.
air force beat wake by 36. i know wake sucks, but holy shit.
Fear the Princeton offense
oh, and unless jake peavy comes with a side order of scott linebrink and heaping helping of brian giles, you can color me uninterested.
I've always colored you yellow, and outside the lines. Looks like Brewster's Millions references do not get you into the Blogdome...
I added the D.C. Sports Bog to the links...it's good for a daily read.
I would pay serious money to be in a meeting with Gilbert Arenas...what do you think, 13 second attention span (I'm not much better)? Rousing games of paper football? Pencil toss into ceiling tiles?
Busy Man
Posted by Gilbert Arenas on November 29 2006, 4:45 p.m. ET
I was in meetings all day. One was just giving me creative ideas of how to branch myself out. There were different concepts. We don’t want to give out the buzz now, so I’m going to hold off on that.
Old Dominion University has beaten three teams this year that run a version of the Princeton offense. Not world-beaters, they, but someone might want to take a page from the Big Blue if they're facing it.
Nevada, 7-0 after beating Cal last night. That's two wins over Pac-10 teams...
Florida lost to FSU last night.
Is there a single Gator who cares right now? Probably not.
I was wondering the same thing...however, it's been said before and I'll say it again, I love having Sunday night college hoops back on as an alternative to suck-ass games such as Jacksonville/Miami.
Yeah, the Sunday night college hoops game is always a welcome diversion. The end of Va.Tech-GW was pretty exciting too. Good thing, since I was stuck watching Tampa-Pitt and/or Miami-Jacksonville. Ugh.
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