A batboy who took a dare to chug a gallon of milk has been suspended six games by the Marlins.The batboy drank the milk in the alotted time frame (an hour), but couldn't hold it down. Brad Penny, the instigator in this dare is not happy with the suspension, and has a good point. ''It's kind of ridiculous that you get a 10-game suspension for steroids and a six-game suspension for milk,'' Penny said.
In a related story, Jeff Weaver vomited on himself after failing the Saltine Challenge. He is also an admitted psychopath. But, we love him. Wouldn't it be fun to spend some quality time in the Dodger clubhouse - not a very boring place to be. Between, Milton Bradley's general insanity, Jeff Kent's racial slurs, Jeff Weaver's imaginary friends, and the batboy performing circus tricks I can't imagine a more stimulating environment.
Wednesday, August 24, 2005
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
32 comments:
And don't forget the whole Derek Lowe/Fox News lady affair.
Forex this pal.
Why does this keep happening to you?
I blame Dennis.
Thanks for clearing up what the site is about. You're a real pro. Now go fuck yourself. Thanks!
Dennis, you have a fantastic site. Keep it up.
But while I'm here, I thought maybe you'd be interested in a 1982 Buick LeSabre. She runs like a charm, purrs like a kitten, some might say. Automatic transmission, A/C, and just a toddler at 126,00 miles. You'll be driving this car to your grandkids' graduation with the life left in this magnificent vehicle. Stylish faux-Corinthian-pleather interior, a glove compartment big enough to hold an infant, and a trunk you could live out of if it came down to it. Newish brake pads, whitewalls, and a stunning, formerly state-of-the-art AM/8-track stereo with three 8-tracks thrown in just because you have a great blog (REO Speedwagon's "You Can Tune a Piano But You Can't Tunafish, "The Best of Burt Bacharach," and "It's a Muppet World After All"). You're a big guy? Not a problem in the Bu, baby. Stretch those big stilts out as you drive like the stylin', profilin' champ of the world that you are. Headroom? You betcha. You can wear that smooth Fedora inside that car, you betcha. Back seat room? Let's just say you could deliver the good wood to not one but two of them lovely fiancees of yours in the back at one time with spare room to have a cheerleader watch and videotape the whole thing, and chances are good to great it's already happened back there if you don't believe me. Just because you're a cool guy, and because you've got a great blog, I can make you a one-time offer of sixteen-five, throwing in not one set of seat beads but two, as well as -- I hesitate to do this, but your blog is so funny . . . okay, what the hell, a like-new set of wiper blades and one plastic drink holder for your coffee, seltzer, or you-know-what (wink wink). Dennis, my man, let's talk. What do I have to do to put you behind the wheel, chum?
Come on by and have a look, and keep writing that funny stuff!
Your New Ride
Keep throwing out a line and eventually you'll catch something, I was once told.
i think the more you allow this the more it will happen...
perhaps having any comment on your blog is better than nothing?
The blogosphere is out of control. This is what happens when you mix tar with kryptonite.
btw, Dennis is the second worst Stratego player of all-time. I captured his flag w/ a scout last night. I wouldn't be surprised if next time he puts his flag on the front line.
Geoff still holds the title of "Worst strategy game player ever".
And here I was thinking the Internet was filled with nerds. Huh.
whitney, we were drinking while playing. does that make it ok for you?
George is getting very upset.
C'mon Irene.
By the way, a source close to the Angry Man softball team has been quoted today as saying the team has "a stunningly weak lineup tonight" and that it's possibly "the worst 10-man team we've ever had." This should be fun.
I was in on the same e-mail thread, and I have to agree. We're missing most (not all) of the best hitters and fielders from the summer lineup, we'll have multiple guys who don't normally play with us, we lost the heart and soul manager/3B to Ohio, and Joe Corcoran may pitch. It's like our sergeant told us before one trip into the jungle: "Men -- fifty of you are leaving on a mission. Twenty-five of you ain't coming back."
And yeah, MJ, if you were drinking, it's cool. My bad - I should have assumed.
Worst strategy game player ever? Yep, sure, why not. When I was down in Hilton Head I lost 7 straight games of Memory down at the Alzheimer's ward.
Anyone know where I can get some info on bladder cancer...preferably in blog form?
I usually play co-ed softball in the congressional league down on the mall where there are no bases, no real field and there hasn't been an errorless inning in league play since Sam Rayburn was Speaker. Let's play two!
Did anyone visit Mary Morgan's site? It's about a state of being called Normism, and everyone is a follower of Norm, and it's religious but not, and it's heaven on earth via Norm. My problem was that nowhere on the site could I find any funny quotes about beer.
Geoff, we have you penciled in at first base. Good glove man, likes to be near the dugout where the beer is. Does that seem about right?
Oh man, wait until I uncork my first throw from third in about 5 years...
I can play a cromulent first--smooth draw, nutty finish, enough height to get the high and the low. It's where I feel most comfortable. And my ability to hit slap singles has significantly imporved once I came to grips with my warning track power.
And I don't take the field until I'm at least two beers deep. Oh, and sometimes I smoke at first...
Are we short a guy--the guy who sits in the cube outside my office is an extremely strong player...
Johnny Grant was once chastised by the ump for smoking while playing third base. Some bullshit from the league, typical oppression from The Man.
My power faded to the warning track variety some time ago, so we're counting on Jerry to provide the long balls (ngs, as they say). Like Dr. David Banner, he does this best and most frequently when perturbed by the other team.
We should have the full 10 if everyone who said "IN" shows. Oh, and the beer of choice is Natty Light, mostly because I bring it and it's cheap.
I usually tried to limit my parliament breaks to the innings where the female part of the line up was due up.
Oh, and should I bring some water, bananas and an IV drip for Swint?
I love Natty Light--it's my family label...and by family I mean me, TJ and Ryan Park...who locked me in his room and watched me drink a fifth of vodka while he played Castlevania one Tuesday.
My favorite discovery of the day--referring to Marcus Vick as "Ron New Mexico." That is all.
Speaking of drinking, I had an interview at 1850 M Street today. That was odd.
Will you be bartending, bouncing or DJ'ing?
Virginia Tech Coach Frank Beamer signed a 7 year contract that pays him $2 mil/season. His goiter, which doubles as the special teams coach, will make 500K.
Post a Comment