"Nick Lachey or Ashley Judd?"

Nick Lachey or Ashley Judd?...Nick Lachey or Ashley Judd?...A look behind the curtain of the thought process that has the Future Mrs. Simspon 12-4 after Day One, whereas yours truly went a pedestrian 9-7. Thank god UW-Milwaukee gave me something to hang my hat on. By the way, I think she chose Ashley Judd.

That's about as funny as Sinbad. Not the comedian, he's hilarious. The sailor. But then again he was never meant to be funny...I forgot to give my Final Four picks yesterday - Okie St, Ga Tech, UNC, and Syracuse. I would hope if that did happen I could win some money.

You know those Germans; if you don't join the party, they come get you...No one can tell me they watched Adam Morrison last night and didn't immediately think Dirk Nowitzki.

I require a window seat and an in-flight Happy Meal and no pickles. God help you if I find pickles...You know what, I don't want the lime in the coconut OR the lime in my Coke - I don't want the damn lime period.

Forecast for tomorrow; A few sprinkles of genius with a chance of doom...I think CSI's next case should be examining the corpse of LSU.

I'm glad I'm not taking your stupid tour! I'm a Coors man anyway. Silver bullet!...You put me, Dennis, the Wheelhouse guys, and even Swint, on the floor at the same time and I guarantee we run a better offense than UCLA.

Wow, that guy must've been wasted 24 hours a day, huh?...Whitney, let us know your alive.

Now let's go to Greg The Weather Mime...Jerry, you excited for the Plaxico Era in NY?

Yes, I rather like this God fellow. He's very theatrical, you know, a pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence. Gotta get me some of that...How the hell is Robert Blake innocent?

Hey, Lois, the lost my job smells great. Hey, Meg, could you pass me the fired my ass for negligence?...Coming to work at 6:30am sucks donkey balls, but I must admit it was made much easier by my co-workers' blasting of Britney's Greatest Hits on the way in.